FICLET: "Appreciating the Health Professions"
SERIES: Nr. 14 of the Boring!Orli series. Back to nr. 13.

Author: Lobelia; [email protected]
Pairing: Orlando Bloom / original character.
Warning: Het? Femslash? Difficult to say...
A/N: This one's all for Lazulus.

-----

Orli opened his eyes. Here is what he saw:

A pair of white gauze curtains, blowing in a breeze.

A ray of sunshine slanting its way onto a polished pvc floor.

A high ceiling, four walls, a monitor, a catheter, an electrocardiographometer, a winch, a wench, a bench with stench.

The wench was a Royal Nurse. A starched white cap perched atop her copper hair which was pulled back in a severe chignon. Her eyes were rimmed by the tortoiseshell frame of stern spectacles. She padded about the pvc floor in flat, rubber-soled shoes, making little suction sounds as she walked. She moved with the efficiency of a shopping trolley and the precision of the laser beam guns in Devil Aliens from Doom, a computer game Dom liked to play.

Orli's gaze was glued to the wench's bottom.

As she bent, the nurse's pale-blue standard-issue cotton dress stretched across her generously broad behind.

Orli swallowed.

What with everything else -- the memory of a sudden shock, the blaring of ambulance sirens, the daze of drugs on top of other drugs, the draining of blood from his fibular artery, the infusion of cholesterolic bile into his tibular vein, and the strange, the odd, the bizarre, the most...

...delicious, oh the most exquisite, the absolutely delirious sensations spreading out from his nether regions -- what with all of this, the discovery that Orli had a kinky desire for nurses was just one last straw on top of the iceberg.

Orli had been in hospital before. He had been seen to by nurses before. He had never before experienced more than a passing medical curiosity. He had never known the grip of irrational desire he was succumbing to now. He had never sighed over the glimpse of a seamed stocking or caught his breath over the bouncing of a name tag above an ample bosom.

"Nurse," he gasped.

The wench turned around and suctioned up to his bed.

"Yes?" she said.

So close. He could smell her: a mixture of camphor and anti-disinfectant. Her hands were encased in snug surgical gloves.

Oh, he needed those hands. He needed to taste that surgical rip-proof plastic on his tongue. He needed to have those efficient fingers precisely inserted in...

"What is it?" said the nurse. "You look bothered. Shall I call the doctor?"

"N... no. I just wonder... Oh, nurse!" He gripped her wrist and cut his finger on the shard-sharp metal of the wind-up button of her watch.

"I see," said the nurse. Her bosom heaved, inches away from Orli's face.

"I want... I need..." stammered Orli.

"I know."

"But I can't! I've changed! I'm... I don't have a penis anymore!"

The one good thing was that he now did not have a penis wart anymore, either. Unless the wart had folded itself into what were now the insides of Orli's genitalia. Unless his penis had gone underground and was weathering the storm in some fleshly pocket of the newly-shaped Orli. And while part of Orli's brain knew he should care and he should worry and he should writhe on this hospital bed in abject horror...

...another part of his brain was sending signals of a different order entirely. Signals geared to purely corporeal perceptions. Signals that all came from his groinal area, from that part of him that had not been there before, from that hidden region of heat and wetness and overwhelming pulsing urgency.

"God, I wish you were a man!" he blurted out to the nurse. "Because I'm no longer sure if I can be of any use to women."

The nurse smiled. She leant down and brought her mouth close to Orli's ear.

"Honey," she said, "this is your lucky day. I'm a lesbian."

And she unbuttoned her uniform.

-----

[email protected]
20 August 2003

The story continues in nr. 15: Discovering that Girls Have More Fun.

Back to nr. 13: Adjusting to Changes.

All original parts of this story: © Lobelia

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to [email protected].
Or go to this easy-to-use feedback form.

Back to Lobelia's stories.