01/30 -  i finally got my own cell phone everybody !!  i can now officially join the modern technological world...hee hee !  my friends must be surprised .  while they had various pagers & then cell phones, i had absolutely none.  i didn't  know how to page anyone & was very unknowledgeable  'bout manuevering a cell phone w/ it's menus & stuff (except knowing how to call someone).  in fact, i really didn't care to know much 'bout pagers & cell phones.  i used to think  having a cell phone was a leash to the many people who could be calling you for something. it's good to have during an emergency, but not in getting a break & freedom from other people sometimes.  since being in college, my thoughts  on cell phones have changed. i've been using my mom's phone in school, so my older sis can call to notify me where she parked the car.  whenever i went out w/ my friends, i'd take my mom's phone.  before that i'd use my friends' cell to make important calls.  now it just seems that having my own cell phone will be very helpful.  otherwise, you'd be seeing  me roaming around for a pay phone on campus or in public places. i had been eyeing  out the Samsung V205 phone for awhile now.  that phone has a color screen, calendar, a digital camera, & various other wonderful features.  Oprah gave the phone to her audience in 1 of her shows.  the Samsung V205 phone costs 9.99--expensive ya ?  however, i got a Motorola 702i instead.  according to the guy @ the phone place, both phones are similar in quality & features, except the Motorola has a digital camera attachment; whereas, it's already attached in the Samsung.  guess how much i got my phone for ???!! subtracting all the rebates
from the orignal price (9.99), my phone cost .99.  isn't that great  ?!  i also changed the cover of the phone to blue & my older sis has red.  for some odd reason, the color & cover of the phone reminds me of bumper cars.  ain't i weirdo  ?  it's strange having my own cell phone now....i gotta get used to that.


01/28 - 2 of my friends came down to the restaurant to eat today.  it was nice walking in to the restaurant seeing  them sitting @ their usual table smiling  me.  however, i didn't work @ the restaurant long since i had to pick up my older sis an hour & a 1/2 later @ school.  my reoccuring headache  is a bitch.  i can only get some relief from it when i rub my temples.  the aspirin hasn't really worked. okie, let me tell 'bout the show OZ, which i watched  for the 1st time on the HBO channel. i don't regularly have the HBO channel, but i found out i did yesterday while channel surfing.  i think  it's a free preview.  anyways..  boy was that show graphic in content & language!!  if you've never heard of the show before, it's takes place in a prison following several prisoners--some on death row.  i've heard bits & pieces 'bout the show on several award shows 'cause it's supposedly this critically acclaimed show giving a some-what real portrayal of the goings on in prisons.  yuck ..there's guys kissing each other, banging each other, giving each other blow jobs, & killing each other.  i'm totally & extremely frighten of prisons & prisoners now.  maybe Oz should be shown to all the young trouble-makers across the nation to scare them straight.  if they saw  what i did, i'm sure they'll make an effort to not get themselves in there.  i don't think  i'll forget that show anytime soon.


01/27 - i had a tough time in my Chinese class today.  i'm not a fast learner, & my Chinese is horrible.  i only got by missing textbook right before class began, & there was a character quiz.  it's safe to say that i totally bombed the quiz .  i only checked my UH e-mail account last night to find an e-mail from the T.A. on Thursday saying he found my textbook under the desk i was using.  ugh ... i'm such a scatter brain!!!  i'm feeling really down  now.  i've tried studying Chinese, but it involves a lot of memorization.  people who read this & know me that's not my strength.  i'm can be very forgetful .  yes , i should study more, but i blank out when the professor calls.  i'm so pathetic..


01/26 - 12:01 a.m.--it's offically Super Bowl Sunday, & i just got home from the Night in Chinatown festivities.  boy did i stay a really long time there.  my older sis dropped my bro & i off @ the State Capitol @ 4 p.m., & almost got runned over by the mayor....LOL !. wow , i've got such a huge heachache  right now.  it must be from all the loud instrument & drumming for the lion dance 'cause i was following my bro's club almost the entire time.  @ around 8:30 p.m. i met up w/ some friends, & watched  the Chinese Physical Lion Dance Association club perform on stage.  then i watched  Gee Yung--my bro's club.  i had a pretty fun night seeing  people from my past & enjoying the night w/ lots of lion dancing.  i decided not to go dancing w/ my friends last night after i thought of reconsidering on going.  the headache wasn't going to put me in a happy  mood, so i passed.  i hope they had fun night.
 

01/25 - what a beautiful Saturday morning..  i may be going to the restaurant a little later, but as of right now i should be cleaning up my very messy room.  you can obviously tell that's not what i'm doing right now...hee hee !  tonight i'll be taking my younger bro to Chinatown for the parade & the block party celebrating Chinese New Year.  my friends asked me out to go dancing @ a club tonight, but i don't feel like being in a cramped, crowded, stinky room this weekend--maybe next weekend.  i'm sorry!  now let me tell 'bout the 2 dvds i rented from Blockbuster: Beijing Bicycle (Chinese) & Amelie (French).  i watched Beijing Bicycle 1st, & it was a frustration movie to watch .  in some films, not having a lot of dialogues can make the film simplistic yet captivating because the facial expressions of the actors can reveal the emotions that's to be felt w/o words.  yet the lack of the dialogues in Beijing Bicycle really irritated & frustrated  me because words needed to be minced in some scenes.  Guei gets his bike stolen, & gets beaten up in his attempt to reclaim the bike.  he never speaks up, & just takes the beating.  he's got proof the bike is legitimately his, yet he never says anything .
Synopsis: Guei is a young man from rural China struggling to make a good living in Beijing as a bicycle messenger.  The company issues him a new mountain bike, which he must pay for out of his wages.  Guei soon discovers his job is not easy--dealing w/ the complexity of the huge city, confusion over who gets what message, & the condescending attitude Beijing residents often display toward the new arrivals.  Gui is determined to make good & is close to owning his bike when it's stolen.  His boss tells him the only way he can keep his job is if he can find the bicycle, which in a city the size of Beijing is no easy task.  Against all odds, Gui finds the bicycle, but it's now in the hands of Jian.  Jian is a high school student.  The bike to him is the key to teen society w/ his friends & Xiao, a girl he likes.  When Guei finds the bike & stubbornly tries to reclaim it in the face of great odds, Jean claims he bought it @ a used bike shop.  The two young men & the people around them are swept up in the youths' desperation to reclaim what they each believe is theirs.Amelie, on the otherhand, was a much better movie.  the movie was quirky & different from any other films i've seen .  the cinematography is captivating, & so is the storyline.  now i see  what all the hype & great reviews of Amelie was all about.  i liked the movie.  it was intriguing & lovely.  the actress whom played Amelie was really great .
Synopsis: Amelie is looking for love, & perhaps for the meaning of life in general.  We see her grow up in a slightly dysfunctional family.  She was misdiagnosed w/ an unusual heart condition as a child, & didn't attend school w/ other children.  Amelie spent most of her time in her room instead, where she developed a keen imagination & an active fantasy life.  Her mother died in a freak accident when she was 8, & her father has had limited contact w/ her since his presence seem to throw her heart into high gear.  Despite that, she's grown into a healthy & beautiful young woman working as a waitress in a cafe.  She interacts curiously w/ her neighbors & customers as well as a mysterious Photomaton (image collector), & 1 of his even more mysterious photo subjects.  Little by little, Amelie realizes that the way to happiness requires her to take an initiative & reach out to others hoping to bring them a bit of happiness.


01/24 - the weekend is here!!  Super Bowl Sunday is in 2 days!!  i had a good  day in school today.  my mom picked me up late this morning, so i missed my POLS 336 class--leaving me w/ only my CHN 102 class to attend.  however, i either lost or forgot my Textbook under my seat in yesterday's class.  hmm..i hope it shows up soon 'cause i don't wanna buy another one .  then i had to wait for my older sis to finish getting dressed to come pick me up.  that left me w/ an hour or so to cruise around campus.  therefore i decided to walk over to The Lounge @ the Campus Center to catch up w/ some friends.  i found myself hanging outside The Lounge instead chatting  w/ some high school buddies, which was really fun . we were discussing 'bout various singers, celebrities, high school classmates, etc..  it's been an extremely long time since i was able to chat w/ anybody in school that way.  i'm always running from class to class, & never able to make small chat w/ classmates (except in my Chinese class).  a loner is what i am in school.  sad  ya ?


01/23 - ugh, the UH - Fresno st. basketball game just ended on t.v.. the UH men's basketball team lost @ Fresno St. by just 1 point ; nonetheless, it was a great  game.  here's a lil' montage of the last 30 mins. of the game via my pc camera:
    

    


01/22 - 2 a.m. this morning, i found myself unable to sleep  after my attempt @ trying to finish my Chn 102 homework.  then a show called A Journey Of Man began on the PBS channel.  it was a very englightening even though i didn't watch  it 'til the end.  the geneticist, who was also the host of the show, had been researching DNA found in blood for 15 years to trace the history of man's 1st existence.  after listening to him explain his theory & evidence, i now know w/ certainty everyone in this world is related to each other 1 way or another.  of the 30 mins. i watched , the geneticist visited the African Bushmens--a slowly extincting tribe in Africa.  1 look  @ the people in the tribe & you can see  the features of many ethnic groups around the world in their face . various of them had Asian features--especially in their eyes .  others had high cheek bones that's identified w/ Mongolians, obvious African features, & so on.  it was so eerie seeing  the people of that tribe.  i guess it's quite true everyone in this world has African blood in them no matter what the color of their skin is or their ethnicity.  here's a shorter & altered version of the summary i found on the PBS.org website about the show A Journey Of Man:
 Today, 6 billion people are spread across the planet, but there was a time when the human species numbered only a few thousand.  Africa was then the single & only continent.  Due to drought & famine, a small group left their African homeland on a journey into an unknown, hostile world.  Against impossible odds, they survived & went on to conquer the earth.  Their story is finally told through the science of genetics. Dr. Spencer Wells, a 33-year-olgeneticist, is closing his lab door to embark on an adventure to retrace that journey which involves every man, woman, & child alive.  He's been part of a worldwide team of scientists for the past 15 yrs. trying to map the genetic history of mankind w/ clues left behind by the ancient travellers--the blood of everyone alive.  In the blood is the DNA they inherited from those ancient travellers.  Wells travels to every continent, endures every terrain, to meet the key human groups that hold the genetic history in their blood-�the African Bushmen, Australian Aborigines, Native Americans, Chukchi reindeer herders, & Kyrgyz nomads.then i got a very shocking surprise  in my ES 331 class today. the professor was beginning her lecture when walks in Timmy Chang, quarterback for UH's football team.  wow .  i always thought he was an alright looking guy from t.v. & in the newspapers, but upclose & personal...he's so Good-looking .  i think my heart stopped beatin' when Timmy walked in.  the 1st thing that came to my mind was.."he looks  familiar."  the professor even asked him if he plays football, but i figured that out by then.  i was just stuck figuring  out what his name was.  alright 'nuff 'bout that cutie .  i just got home from the library 1/2 an hour ago borrowing books on Chinese horoscopes, numerology, dreams, & reading faces.  i'm reading them for fun trying to learn more 'bout myself.  nah, Chinese New Year got me interested in learning 'bout my Boar sign, interpretating my dreams, & reading the meanings of my facial features.  i'll tell you more 'bout it in another entry.


01/21 - same 'ol same 'ol today.  nothing much going on right now in my life.  just glad there's no drama going on in the family as of now.  i hope it'll stay that for awhile.  well, there's lots of things going on politically in the U.S..  Rev. Al Sharpton formally filed papers to be the 6th Democratic presidential candidate for 2004.  hmm, i'm not sure what to think  'bout that.  the presidential election is years away, but i know the campaigning is already starting.  i should stay updated because it'll be the 1st time i'll get to vote for the presidency office.  that's right , i'm doing my patriotic duty to vote.  then there's the recent news of 2 Americans killed in Kuwait.  wow , the reality of war w/ Iraq is surely coming.  i'm not against the war, but i'm also not against it.  if Sadam Hussein is hiding nuclear weapons & unwilling to disarm, a U.S. led attack is imminent & i won't be protesting against it. sometimes a passive approach doesn't always work, especially w/ someone as evil as Sadam.  hopefully the peace  talks w/ North Korea will find a peaceful resolution soon.  it's stressful to turn on the t.v. & hear 'bout the possible wars w/ Iraq & North Korea.  everyone's wishing for peace, but that doesn't come too easily.  .


01/19 - 8:36 a.m...kinda early for me to be waking up on a Sunday, huh ? i'll be working this evening instead of
morning 'cause my older sis has a dinner to go to.  yesterday i went to the laundromat to dry to clothes because i was
lazy to hang them up.  then i dropped by the restaurant to help because it was busy.  late in the afternoon i went home
leaving my younger bro there to help out. i stayed home & chilled on the comp after that. i did watch  some
of the uh men's volleyball game on t.v. i believe Shanghai Oriental won the game. late @ night i went w/
my parents  & bro down to Chinatown to check out the festivities going on @ the Chinese Cultural Plaza. we
came just in time for the last lion dance team, Gee Yung, to showcase their talent on stage, which was my bro's club.
they performed their usual sets, & finally performed their lion dancing on the poles, jong.  it was a great show.  their
poles were nicely decorated in gold. the lion was apparently climbing up the mountain. Gee Yung would've performed
a more difficult routine if it wasn't the time restraints; nonetheless, they did a wonderful job.  that's the inside scoop..
11:10 p.m...kinda late for an update entry on today ?  well, i ended up not having to go down to the
restaurant 'cause i wasn't called in.  therefore, i dyed by hair brown-black since i got bored.  i'm gonna add
in red streaks later.  however, my hair looks  extremely black & i'm looking  a bit gothic now. oh well.
i was watching  the news on t.v. earlier & caught the coverage of the Sony Open @ the
Waialae Country Club (which isn't that far from where i live) on all the local news station.
wow , have you seen  Aaron Baddeley ?  he had a fantastic performance @ the
Sony Open--almost beating Ernie Els @ the age of 21. some people are even comparing his
talents to Tiger Woods.  but all i can say is Aaron Baddeley is 1 good-looking guy. he's an
Aussie (i love  guys w/ foreign accents!!) whom looks  more like a surfer than a golfer.
lol ..i could get more interested in golf if he's involved . i posted up Aaron Baddeley's pics--what do
you think ??  i don't think the pic on the left does him justice.  he's much more handsome  than that.


01/17 - whew!  i had a very long day today, but not in a bad way.  i went to school this morning, but that doesn't neccessarily
mean i attended my 2 classes...hee hee !  for some apparent reason, i just didn't feel like going to class when i got to school.
therefore, i validated my school i.d., & browsed around the bookstore w/ my unexpected free time.  so you see , i didn't waste
my time going to school 'cause i got some things done .  since i don't have my ES 331 class on fridays i left school to go work
early, or so i thought.  either my older sis gave me the wrong instructions or i heard her wrong...it took me an hour to find the
car in order for me to get down to the restaurant.  i worked for a couple of hours & then picked up my younger bro from school
early.  we decided to then stop by the library to browse for books to borrow, but was unsuccessful in finding any interesting books
to read.  then we finally reached home where we stayed for 'bout 2 hours.  my bro & i went down to
Chinatown for Choy Chang--the Chinese New Year celebration w/ lion dancers chasing away
evil spirits & blessing shops w/ good luck & fortune.  but in my opinion, the celebration in Chinatown
came earlier than usual since Chinese New Year is 2 weeks away.  there's usually a parade starting
near City Hall in the Downtown area which ends in Chinatown where there's a block party, but
there hasn't been 1 yet.  it usually occurs a week before Choy Chang.  oh well.  i had an alright night.
the lion dancing brought back all my happy  memories when i was a part of that scene.  sometimes i
wish i could join in on the fun, but it's too late for that.  okie..then i came home early
to catch the last episode of the korean drama all about eve--1 of my most fav. korean drama, which is
why i left Chinatown early.  wow , i'm still amazed 'bout the last scene, which is the only kissing scene
for the drama's top couple.  most of the kissing scenes i've seen  in korean dramas are done poorly &
looks  very fake, but the kiss in aae was the 1st realistically looking  one.  finally the most saddest 
news of all is that my friend shan left for Colorado to continue her college education.  i'll miss you !!
it's 11:39 p.m. now & i think it's time for me to go sleep .  my long day is finally coming to an end....  nighty night everyone.


01/15 - there's some freakin' crazy/stupid people in this world.  the stupid neighbors @ the restaurant can't get it through their
empty brains that the parking spaces belong to the restaurant & not them.  they've known very well their apartments don't have
parking spaces even though it's right in front of them.  my parents have asked them repeatedly to move their car & to stop parking
in our lot during business hours or ever.  the landlord has repeatedly told them the same thing yet they keep saying the parking
spaces are theirs.  hello..they're not a$$holes!  they better be evicted from their apartment after what happened today.  geez, it's
a freakin' parking space that they keep fighting over & getting violent over. i'd rather not get into the incident which occured today,
but the police were called & charges were made.  but they're so pathetic.  now their hiding...


01/13 - today was the beginning of the Spring Semester @ UH-Manoa.  my day went alright.  as of right now, i'm quite
pleased  w/ the classes i have.  i am a bit worried  that my 2 writing intensive classes might turn out to be too much for me
to handle.  well, here was my schedule for today: w/Non-Western Politcal Philosophy (POLS 336) @ 8:30-9:20 a.m.,
Chinese: Mandarin (CHN 102) @ 9:30-10:20 a.m., & w/Chinese in Hawaii (ES 331) @ 10:30-11:45 a.m..  so what do
you think  'bout my classes ??  a lot of Chinese related classes, huh ?  let's just say i'm getting in touch w/ my roots...
hee hee !  here's a little interesting fact 'bout today in Hawaii: today marks the 100th anniversary of the arrival of Koreans.
that's right .  thanks to the koreans, i have those dramas on t.v. w/ English subtitles to watch  here in Hawaii.  there's
going to be a huge celebration @ Kapiolani Park to mark the anniversary.  well, just thought you might wanna know.  before i
go i wanna mention that Carl English  & Michael Kuebler  of the UH men's basketball team was standing a couple
of people in front of me in the line @ the bookstore today.  i can never say enough how handsome Carl English  is!  okie, bye.


01/11 - i mostly home all day cleaning my room & organizing things around before the spring semester begins this coming
Monday.  once school starts back up, i won't have too much time to clean my room, so i did it today.  hopefully it can stay that
way, but i still haven't found my missing items..hrmph !  i think my slight cold is still lingering .  okie, on to other stuff.  while
i was organizing some of my things i watched  2 of the videos rented from Blockbuster--Indochine & The Road Home.
Indochine is a french film w/ English subtitles.  there was Vietnamese spoken throughout the film as well, so i understood
that part w/o the subtitles...hee hee !  i'm not sure what to think about Indochine.  the movie was alright--very interesting but
not that entertaining.  seeing  what Vietnam was like during it's days under French rule was eye-opening.  i thought it was
cool hearing a bunch of Vietnamese speaking French fluently & the French speaking a little Vietnamese.  however, it was
tragic to see the harsh life of poverty most of the Indo-Chinese lived.  if my parents never came to the U.S., i'd probably be
living a life similar to the ones portrayed in the film--working all day for meager wages wearing rags & starving.
Synopsis: An epic set during French colonial rule in Indochina--now Vietnam.  French national Eliane thinks of
Indochina as home: she owns a rubber plantation there & adopted Camille, the Indochinese child of her deceased
friends.  But mother & daughter are soon @ odds over both romance & politics.  Camille has fallen for French naval
officer Jean-Baptiste, who was once Eliane's lover.  Eliane takes steps to cause his transposition onto an island far
from Saigon. Though Camille marries another man she soon sets off for a long journey throughout Indochina to find
him. As she travels the country, she gains greater knowledge & respect for the people of her homeland. When the
French tears her from Jean-Baptiste & their infant child, she's charged for crimes against the state & Eliane takes
charge of their baby.  As time passes, it's clear France's reign of Indochina will end--leaving mother, daughter,
& grandchild on different sides of the ideological issue. (found & altered from imdb.com & blockbuster.comnow on to The Road Home.  i really liked that movie.  it has a beautiful, sincere love story.  the ending was sad  yet touching--
even my younger bro teared up...hee hee! Zhang ZiYi, the girl from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, is in the movie,
& was wonderful.  there wasn't much dialogue in The Road Home, but the actions & facial expressions of the actors tells you the
story w/o having to use many words.  in my opinion, it was a refreshing movie to watch  after so much drama in Indochine.
  Synopsis: Businessman Luo Yusheng returns to his hometown in a rural province in North China for his father's
funeral.  He finds his elderly mother insisting all traditional burial customs be observed--have the coffin be carried
home by local men. Then Yusheng recalls his parent's courtship 40 years ago. young, beautiful Zhao Di finds her-
self falling for the village's handsome new teacher Luo Changyu.  As the males in the village join together to build
a school, Zhao Di helps along w/ other women to prepare lunch & wait patiently to meet the strapping educator.
Just as their romance begins, Luo is suddenly ordered to leave by the Communist authorities.  Though the odds of
a reunion seem slim, Zhao Di steadfastly holds vigil for her lover until miraculously Luo returns after he runs away
from the authorities.  but he's once again ordered back to the city & commanded to stay.  The pair are forced to
wait 2 years until they can be together.  On the day of the funural, more than one hundred of his father's former
pupils turn up to carry the coffin, & none accepted payment.  Before returning to the city, Yusheng symbolically
honors his father's dearest wish--for him to teach just 1 day.  (found & altered from imdb.com & blockbuster.com


01/10 - me just back home from Ala Moana Shopping Center.  my older sis went to pay the cable bill,
& shop around for a wallet for 2 of her friends.  i came along w/ her to help pick it out.  hee hee ..i must have
very good taste .  me just kidding.  anyways, i worked @ the restaurant all afternoon, & 2 of my friends dropped
by for lunch .  it was quite busy day w/ lots of take-out orders, so i'm tired .  now i'm
chilling @ home w/ a slight cold w/ videoes & dvds rented from Blockbuster.  i rented the
Pride & Prejudice dvd days ago, & i finally got to see  the 1st hour of the movie.  wow , i'm so
loving  Pride & Prejudice right now.  too bad i gotta return the dvd on Wednesday .  now on to
the next subject. i went out last night w/ my friends to watch Gangs of New York @ Ward Theatre.
that's right, we went to watch another movie...i know i'm beginning to sound redundant, but oh well.  we actually went earlier
than we usually do so we would have more time to do something else later.  Gangs of New York was a good movie--really
bloody w/ many horrific fighting scenes but good.  the harsh life of living in the 5 Points in New York City was horrendous &
shocking.  i had watched  a mini-doctumentary on the History Channel 'bout the facts & fiction of the real 5 Points & the 1
portrayed in Gangs of New York.  here's an interesting fact: 5 Points is now Chinatown in NYC.  i have no idea when the
irish immigrants moved away & the Chinese immigrants came flooding in to 5 Points.  many of the corruptions seen
in Gangs of New York were also quite true. the 1 thing that kept pissing me off in the movie were the views of the Natives.
the Natives believed they're the true-blooded Americans, & all the immigrants (especially the Irish) were hoarding America
& taking everything away from them.  can you believe that ?!  those so-called Natives are not what they are called unless
they're Native Americans in my view.  they may have been born in America & so were their fathers, but i'm sure somewhere
down their family line they came from Europe.  America is a country made up of immigrants.  everybody (except the Native
Americans) are immigrants even if they were born on this lovely land.  why be haters ?  share the wealth peoples !!
  Synopsis: The violent rise of gangland power in New York City during massive political corruption & the city's
evolution into a cultural melting pot set the stage for this historical epic beginning in 1846 then jumping to 1863.
In 1846, waves of Irish immigrants poured into the New York neighborhood of 5 Points, & a number of citizens
of British & Dutch heritage born in the U.S. began making open display of their resentment toward them. William
Cutting, a.k.a "Bill the Butcher", bands his fellow "Native Americans" into a gang to take on the Irish immigrants.
The immigrants formed a gang of their own, "The Dead Rabbits," organized by Priest Vallon.  After a bloody clash
between the 2 gangs leave Vallon dead, his young son ends up in a reform school before returning to volatile
5 Points in 1862 as Amsterdam. Now an adult who's learned how to fight, Amsterdam seeks vengeance against
Bill who now has underworld control of 5 Points through violence & intimidation w/ the open corruption of NY
politician "Boss" Tweed. As he gradually penetrates Bill's inner circle & earns his respect, he must also contend
w/ Jenny Everdeane, the beautiful, street-smart thief who was once involved w/ Bill. Before Amsterdam can
turn the tables on Bill his true identity is exposed. (found & altered from IMDB.com & Blockbuster.com)after the movie we went to Velvet Touch to play pool.  my friends played pool..i sat on the side talking to whomever wasn't up
playing.  i'm just not a pool type gal, i guess.  maybe i would be if there was a special someone w/ me who could teach me the
game of billards [wink wink] .  overall, i had a good night.  thinking back on the week, i'm so greatful for the friends i have. just
about everyday this week, 1 of my friends have dropped by the restaurant--not just to eat, but also to chat. aren't they such sweet
friends  ?!  they know i'm not free during the day to do something w/ them, so they come to me instead .  in the past i've
been burned by so-called "friends", & have been wary on giving people the title of "friend".  however, the last 2 years have shown
me who my true friends are through their actions & conduct towards me.  they are the ones who were able to be patient w/ my
secretive nature, & were able to get me to open up.  somehow they got me to reveal my true nature w/o feeling scared that i could
end up being scarred.  to my friends, you know who you are, i love & thank you for everything!!


01/08 - whew, me tired !  i practically worked @ the restaurant all day 'cause i'm filling in for my sick Older sis.  however, 3
of my friends dropped by the restaurant to eat lunch.  wow, i haven't seen  Katrina & Ira in about 1 1/2 years, i think .  it
was wonderful to catch up w/ them. i'm such a bad friend for not having put more effort in organizing get-togethers w/ them. i was
so shocked  to hear Ira is leaving tomorrow for Florida.  i had absolutely no idea .  seeing  her today made it more
meaningful to me.  i have no idea  when i'll see  her again...  i'm so sad  to hear she's leaving, but i'm also happy  to
know she'll be able to experience so much more up there.  i wish her all the happiness in the world.  she's such a great person, &
definately deserves the best.  i'll miss you ira!!!  [sigh]..the thought of her leaving reminds me how people you care about aren't always going to be @ an arms-length reach.  the harsh reality are people will always be coming & going hurts, but i'll always remember the fond memories they leave behind w/ a smile .


01/06 - what a surprise i got in the mail today. a friend mailed me a postcard while she's in San Francisco wishing me a happy new year.  i don't think anyone's ever sent me a postcard before, so that was exciting.  hee hee , the smallest things can get me excited. it's also nice to know she still remembers me , or even bother to care.  the little animation i made on the right is the postcard i received. yups , she's in my fav. city.  lucky her.  i wanna go back & visit in a couple of years.  hopefully i can arrange it so that i'm traveling w/ my friends.  just imagine that---hee hee , it'll be quite an interesting trip if it happens.  well, i was working @ the restaurant earlier, & 2 of my friends dropped by to eat.  i was about to go home when she called to check if i was working.  it was worth staying a couple hours more to sit & chat w/ them.  plus, i started reading my Pride & Prejudice book again for the 10th time.  geez, i never get tired  of that book.  it's written so well for me to not get wrapped up in it every time i read it.  1 day i'll buy the dvd to A&E's movie adaption (i totally love it!), but i don't have $$ right now to get it.  hey, anybody wanna get it for me as a b-day gift ?  i know it's 9 months from now, but [*hint hint] that's what i want .  5 people can chip in to get it for me--i don't care.  that's the only thing i've been wanting.  well...actually that & the Pearl Harbor director's cut dvd.  hee hee ....


01/04 - today was my day off from work, but i went in to help my parents fill a large take-out order in the late afternoon.  just before i went home i accidently spilled fish sauce on my pants.  great, huh ?  besides that, my day has been alright.  i even got to sleep  in.  i didn't intentionally sleep  in late--just found myself waking up @ 1 p.m..  ha ha .  i guess i missed breakfast.  but it was probably because i didn't sleep 'til 3 this morning.  i wasn't that tired  & ready to sleep  last night, so i thought i'd do a little reading.  i finally got to the interesting part of Thomas Hardy's Tess of the D'Urbervilles earlier in the day, & i wanted to read what else unfolded.  the book was so interesting that i found myself reading the rest.  i didn't complete the book 'til 3 a.m..  Tess of the D'Urbervilles is so depressing  in the later half--especially when Angel decided to leave Tess after a couple of days of being married because of her confession.  i cried reading that. Tess forgave his sins, but he couldn't cope w/ hers.  argh , the men book treat Tess like crap .  Angel might've been more cruel than Alec because he was her true love, but he then deserted her .  then when he finally realized he still loved Tess, & came back to get her...it was all too late . now i can say the A&E adaption of Tess of the D'Urbervilles was great--quite true to the book.  here's a synopsis of the book:
 Synopsis:  1st subtitled as A Pure Woman & published in 1891--it's one of Thomas Hardy's saddest tales of rural troubles.  Tess is the daughter of poor John Durbeyfield who learns from the village parson that his family is related to ancient nobility.  They're the last of the D'Urberville family line.  In trying to make use of this connection, Joan (John's wife) suggests Tess pursue the son of the local family of Mrs. D'Urberville for help.  As it turns out, Mrs. D'Urberville has merely taken the name for convenience, but Tess becomes involved w/ her son Alec whom gives her employment.  He later takes advantage of her, & seduces her under unpleasant circumstances.  An illegitimate child is later born, but dies early.  The 2nd stage of the novel concerns the family of Reverend Mr. Clare & his son Angel.  Angel meets Tess @ a dairy farm where they both work.  The 2 fall in love & after much hesitation, Tess agrees to marry Angel.  After the wedding Tess confesses about the incident w/ Alec.  Their relationship is then torn apart--leading to Angel's departure for Brazil & giving Alec & 2nd attempt to ensnare Tess.  Hardship, murder, escape, & superficial impurity on the part of Tess who's finally brought to "justice" later unfolds.  This is an exceptionally bleak novel which offers little relapse from the persistent cruelty of fate against Tess. (found & altered from Bibliomania.com)


01/03 - things are okay.  not terrific or wonderful..just okay.  @ least i got a break from my misery  last night when i went out w/ my friends to have dinner @ California Pizza Kitchen @ Pearlridge.  it was quite an interesting night --i'd rather not mention why.  well, i'm home now after working @ the restaurant all afternoon & i'm tired , but i'm happy  my All About Eve korean drama is playing tonight.  it's a great way to escape & live in my fantastically weird world that i've created.  !


01/01 - this day seems to never end for me.  the 1st day of 2003 is a horrible  day for me.  1 word to describe today is: drama.  that's all that's been going on today, & i can't seem to run away from it all.  now i realize the 1 word that could describe this past 2002 for me--it's abandonment.  a few relationships i've treasured & thought highly of w/ other people are gone.  i find myself left stranded to deal w/ the loss .  i haven't done anything to deserve it.  apparently there are people out there who likes to suddenly pack up & leave w/o notice--throwing our relationship out the window .  i have so much to deal w/ right now emotionally. is my rocky 2003 beginning a sign of more pain to come ?  will this be another torturous year for me ?  will i ever receive the happiness i'm wishing & hoping for ?