Day 1

So close ... so close ... so close

She feels Bobby's body still then contract, before with a guttural unintelligible cry, his climax hits and he pumps erratically. Lindsay tries frantically to catch his rhythm.

She's so close ... almost there ... one more ... just one more

His quivering body slows and she fears ever making it. Her head tosses against the mattress in frustration. Her hips grind desperately against him seeking her own release.

So close ... just one more ... she's so close

Just as she believes his body will become a dead weight and all her efforts will be in vain she feels his hand sliding down between them. When settled it rubs against her, helping her on her way. She'd begun to lose hope. Lamenting she should have known not to agree to anything tonight. Not that she remembers whose idea it was to start anyway. It's one of those times when you're half way there before you even know you've begun. But that's not the point, the point is, she's not going to finish dammit.

Lips press against the hollow of her neck and then a warm wet tongue runs slowly up and up and up until lips find her ear. "Let it go" she hears as his hand stops rubbing and grasps her hard and suddenly she's there.

Muscles clenching, body trembling, nerves on fire, shattering, her body exploding, the bright white energy inside bursting forth until she's flying, losing breath, body and consciousness.

The next thing she's aware of is a warm body under her, its arms smoothing down a back now bared to the air. She cannot think of a better way to return to life. Sheets slide up her body, her lover determined to keep the air from her cooling skin. She'll appreciate it later she's sure but right now the two of them have created enough body heat to keep her more than warm. She rolls off him and onto her side. His body follows her. Their foreheads rest together, stilted breaths fanning flushed faces. His hand rises to her shoulder then slides down her languid body until coming to rest on her hip. Fingers span and stretch possessing as much of her as he can. His other arm is outstretched above the pillows, fingers gliding through her hair as his eyes gaze into hers.

Her palm rests over his heart, holding it secure. It beats fast and strong. She hears it through her fingers, pumping in her veins. Her free hand rises to his face, cups his cheek, wiping the moisture pooled there on whisker kissed skin. She breathes in deep and long. Smelling sweat, sex and the unmistakable scent of the man she loves. She thinks she'd like to kiss him but sleep takes hold relegating her desire to another day.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 13

Hanging up the phone Bobby grabs Lindsay's hand as she walks past the desk. "Dance with me" he croons pulling her into his arms.

Laughing she says "There's no music"

"We don't need music. Listen to it in your head."

She gives him a quizzical look.

Spinning her away then back he says "Someone taught me that once ... but we won't get into that"

"Ah a woman" Lindsay grins.

"No I was dancing with a guy. Jimmy and I love to dance together."

"Thank you so much for that image Bobby" she laughs.

"But I like dancing with you better."

"Really?"

"Yeah you're easier to dip" he says and demonstrates.

When he raises her again her hands drape around his neck "Why are you so happy?"

As they reach the couch he collapses them onto it. Leaning over her he holds up his hand "I'm married" then drops it to stroke over her hair "I have a beautiful wife..."

"And?"

"And I just scored Red Sox tickets."

"Baseball" she laughs "I should have known"

"Come with me?" he asks hopefully.

"Are we still talking baseball?" she cheekily asks.

His expression of disbelief amuses her "I .. I was ...yes"

"Ok then"

"Really?"

"Yeah"

He kisses her, delighted, then raising says "And what if I wasn't talking baseball"

"The answer's still yes"

YYYYYYYYY

Day 25

Bobby, having spent most of the night advising a client during a police interview, finally arrived home just as much of Boston was rising for the day. Lindsay, barely awake herself, felt his body hit the mattress, heard an exhausted "oomph" and then his breathing even out into sleep. Smiling she curled her body around him, welcoming him home. She doesn't like it when he is gone nights. The bed is empty without him, the smell of him on the sheets and pillows taunts her with his absence. With him again where he belongs she happily succumbs to another hour's sleep. It is Saturday, no need to hurry out of bed now.

Having risen an hour ago, Lindsay now stands in the doorway between bathroom and bedroom, watching Bobby sleep. His bare back golden in the light from the window. His face burrowed into the mattress. Arms outstretched above his head, mouth open slightly, breathing just loud enough for her to hear. Her eyes love him, her heart loves him, her mind delights in him.

She wants to let him sleep, she knows how tired he is but she has an overwhelming desire to speak to him. She's watched him for ten full minutes now trying to decide what to do. Needs versus wants. In the end she allows him to make the decision for her. She knows him and she knows to be woken is what he'd choose. She walks over slowly and lays her body atop of his, her arms crossed along his shoulders, her chin resting upon her joined fists. Her feet only reach to his calves and she runs her toes over the edge of the muscle she finds there.

It takes a while for Bobby's body to react under her. When a grunt is heard and he shifts his head on the pillow she leans her chin forward and whispers into his exposed ear "Are you awake?"

His grumbled reply sounds suspiciously like a 'no.'

"Pity, because I want to tell you something" she again whispers nuzzling against his cheek.

"Later ... m'sleep"

Lindsay's hands run along Bobby's arms. She rests her head atop of his. They lay as carbon copies of each other to which Bobby makes no objection. It's only the talking he has a problem with. He likes her being near, likes to be cloaked in her scent, likes the feel of her warm skin and soft cotton against his back, or is it warm cotton and soft skin, whatever, he just likes her there.

Restless, Lindsay soon becomes vexed by his inertia. With her lips against his ear tickling his skin she speaks, asking "Bobby, you sure you're not awake?"

"I'm sure!"

She pushes up and off him. Her knees sliding to his sides as she straddles his thighs. Her hands set about massaging his back. Working the tired muscles hard. Drawing their tension up and out. His warm skin supple under her touch. She watches it stretch and crease and marvels at it's strength and beauty. This is who he is. This keeps him whole, keeps muscles, bones, blood and ligaments joined in one beauteous package. It encapsulates his essence, his smell, his warmth, it's a balm to her hands and body. Skin so soft so delicate so strong.

Groans of pleasure greet each of her strokes. As her hands finally reach his shoulders and neck she leans into his ear and asks "You awake now?"

A mumbled "No" is his reply.

Sighing her hands run across his shoulders blades and then under his body. Her fingers seek out and find his nipples. Giving each a light pinch and twist she asks "Is there anything I can do to wake you up?"

"No" is again his reply but the tone is no where near as firm as before.

A pleased smile crosses her face and her hands slide down his chest and abdomen slowly, letting nails lightly rake. She watches the ripples play down his back as his body, defying his mind, reacts. After insinuating themselves under his waistband her hands reach their destination. Taking hold of him she giggles softly and declares "It's a shame to waste this on a sleeping man."

Seconds after her hand releases him he grumbles and rolls over. Lindsay still across his thighs rises then settles again when he's finished turning. With a grin she looks at the results of her handiwork "Were you dreaming about camping?" she asks still giggling.

His hand reaches up and, insinuating itself in the hair at the back of her head, pulls her face down to his. He'll teach her to laugh at him. After a thorough, tent enhancing, kiss Lindsay pushes up from his chest and settles again against his thighs. He gets his first true view of her. She's wearing the shirt he discarded when he arrived home. Sleeves rolled up, buttons undone, it gapes open revealing nothing but delicious, unfettered skin. Now that is a sight worth waking up to.

His eyes scan her body then rise again to meet hers. Her face is aglow, decidedly mischievous. She's up to something, exactly what it is he's unsure, but the fact she is for all intents and purposes naked clues him in to at least some of her plan.

"What's so important you couldn't let me sleep?" he asks. The tone removes any animosity that can be found in his words. His active fingers playing along her thighs distract her and a reply isn't quick in forthcoming. He tugs on their shirt becoming impatient for a response.

She smiles down at him and says "I needed to talk to you."

"Talk?" he almost squeaks in reply.

"Well tell you something really"

Her excitement is contagious and he can't stand being idle any longer. Sitting up he slides back until leaning against the headboard saying "Ok, I'm listening." He watches her face, he sees the explanation come and go a number of times but still she's silent. Impatience sets in, "Just say it!"

Nodding her head, she takes his advice. Her face brightens into a glorious smile. She takes a deep breath and says "I'm pregnant."

For a split second all the air is sucked from the room then it rushes back in with Bobby's euphoric "Holy cow!"

"Holy cow?" she laughs relieved and amused by his reaction. "This is what you say to the mother of your child."

Bobby's amazed he even managed to say that much. The feelings and emotions are tumbling through his body at such a rapid pace there is no way he could articulate any of them. Again his hand cups the back of her head, "Come here" he utters. His lips meet hers and with them he expresses his joy. Laying her down beside him, his mouth and body move over her, offering the words he's too stunned to say.

'I'm ecstatic' her breast is told. It takes the message and passes it on. Her heart hears first and increases its tempo. A heat pools in her abdomen and her hips become restless to join in the fun. Message given and received, his lips return to hers, leaving his hand to continue spreading the word. As his palm skims down her side it takes a detour and comes to rest over her womb. His mouth leaves hers and intense awed eyes express his unspeakable joy.

"I know" she tells him, her hands framing his face, "I know!"

His arms slide under her back and draw her towards him. He rolls until she's lying above him. Her laughter fills the room. All he can think is, she's so beautiful and she's his! He's immeasurably proud he's made her this happy.

"What are you thinking?" she asks leaning over him. Her hands entangle in his hair as she watches the wheels churning in his brain. She sees embarrassment flash over his face and becomes concerned. "What?" When he still doesn't appear to be going to speak she pleads "Bobby? Talk to me."

He pushes her hair behind her ear and chuckles nervously when it refuses to stay put. He looks up into her inviting eyes and grins guiltily "I uh ... I feel a little cave man actually."

She smiles sliding off him and laying with her head on the pillow next to him. Her hand runs along his cheek turning his face towards her "What do you mean?"

He shifts so they are both on their sides. He moves in close to her pressing her body against his. "I'm proud of us ... of this ..." he looks down at their joined bodies then up again at her face "of getting 'my woman' pregnant."

She giggles and teases "Me Tarzan you Jane."

He laughs "Yeah ... God Linds I want to shout it from the rooftops." Her smile drops and he becomes concerned. "What?"

"I don't want to tell people."

Suddenly the air in the room feels stifling "You are ... Lindsay you are happy about this aren't you?"

"Yes! God Bobby yes. It's just too soon to tell. I mean I can only be 4 weeks at the most." She smiles and drapes her leg over him pulling him closer. "Just yet. I don't want to tell people just yet."

His hand runs gingerly over her thigh. "What else?"

"What?"

"Something else is bothering you." She rolls away from him but he follows leaning over her "Tell me"

"Bobby our original wedding day would have been two weeks ago..."

"Your upset..." she puts her fingers to his lips silencing him.

"I just don't want people thinking we moved it forward because I was pregnant."

"That's not what happened."

"I know but... they'll think it when we announce so soon that I'm pregnant they'll think it."

"Lindsay do you need the speech" he teases.

"No I don't need the 'Bobby's is the only opinion that matters' speech. I know it by heart now."

"You sure?"

"I'm positive" she kisses him letting him feel just how sure she is.

"No speeches, good because I think we've done enough talking already."

She grins "Communication is imperative in a marriage Bobby."

He leans closer against her "Maybe so but I have more pressing matters to attend to right now"

"You want to go back to sleep?" she asks with an air of innocence and a finger twirling in his hair.

"Sleep? No, sleeping is not on my agenda."

"Hmmm I like the sound of that. If you're suggesting what I think you're suggesting you're a little overdressed though"

He smiles and shucks out of his boxers. She welcomes him back into her arms and cradles him with her legs. Their lips and hands and skin continue the conversation. Soft and slow, treasuring the feel of each other. He loves the feel of her under and around him. So small, so strong, so soft and now carrying a new life too...

"Wait! Should we do this I mean with you being..."

Lindsay laughs "Sex is good for the baby Bobby"

He rises up on his elbows and looks down at her surprised "It is?"

"Well it's good for the mother and what's good for the mother has got to be good for the baby."

"Good?" His face looks crestfallen.

"What?"

He rolls onto his back "I'm only good ... all this time and effort and the best you can say is good."

She laughs "Ok how about incredible ... phenomenal ... amazing ... wonderful...."

"Better" he rolls back to her side and rewards each subsequent compliment with a kiss "much better"

With such pleasant rewards being proffered she continues "...mind numbing ... body shattering ... outstanding feats of human endurance that should be written up in...." she stops her face contorting to a frown.

"What? Written up where?"

She giggles "I'm trying to think of some medical texts but God Bobby while you're doing that my thought processes aren't exactly clear all I can come up with are law journals."

He smiles "Could certainly make studying consumer law more interesting."

"Bobby?"

"Yeah?"

"Why are we still talking?"

"Lindsay communication is imperative in a marriage" he smugly says.

"Shut up and kiss..." the rest of her sentence is cutoff as he obeys her command.

"Better?" he asks pulling away slightly.

"Much!" her hand draws him back again.

He allows his weight to settle on her again. His eyes scour hers for signs of discomfort. She smiles up at him. Her delight evident in the glow of her face. "You're so beautiful" he hears himself saying. Sometimes the words poor out without intention surprising both of them. Her eyes have a way of unlocking his soul. When she reaches up and draws his mouth down to hers he's glad he said it he doesn't tell her that enough.

"I love you" she says reverently when their mouths separate.

"Lets see if I can do better than good" he teases.

Laughing she says "Bobby want to know where I'm most sensitive?"

His eyes darken and the arousal, interest and elation crossing over his face is a little overwhelming. Her fingers raise and touch the center of her forehead. His eyes roam from that spot back to hers.

"Sometimes all it takes is you entering the room."

Compelled by the swell of emotion in him he joins their bodies, whispering "I love you" to her as he does so.

Her head tilts back and her mouth opens on a silent cry of pure delight. He watches her. She's so beautiful, body and soul. He wants more of her, he wants to see it all, gathering her to him he rolls so she's above him. His world, his vision, his love all there before him.

She raises up on her arms, her palms pressing against his shoulders and her eyes bore into him. Her body glides over him as she whispers "Everything ... after that... is just ... a bonus."

He watches her take everything he has to give. Her breasts heaving with each life giving breath. He hears a chant of 'so beautiful' and doesn't know if it's his mind or his voice. His hands slide up her body, across her breasts then over her shoulders as he attempts to draw his shirt off of her. She lays against him, chest to chest, stopping his action.

"I want it on Bobby" she says against his ear then her lips travel across his jaw line and settle on his mouth. "I want you everywhere" she says continuing across the other side of his jaw "Can never get enough of you" his other ear is told.

She rises again looking down at him and his hands run over her telling her he feels the same. They settle on her sides, his thumbs caressing the swell of her waist. His eyes following their action. Amazement, joy, wonder, incredulity. "A baby" he mouths when his eyes again meet hers. Her eyes are moist, the power of her emotion evident.

"Are you ok? ... Shouldn't you feel sick?"

She shakes her head. "No ... not at all ... I feel great ... I feel ... fantastic"

"No kidding!" he says and framing her face draws her mouth to his.

"Have you ever heard of second trimester hormones" she asks peppering his face with kisses.

He chuckles "Just the name scares me"

She raises enough to look into his eyes. He feels her breath wash over his face. Clenching as she glides she whispers "They can make ... a woman ... incredibly ... incredibly ... horny."

Groaning he draws her against him and rolls them over, "You're going to kill me" he vows before all coherent conversation ceases.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 40

She wakes, as usual, with Bobby's hand in her underpants. Lindsay laughs to herself at how easily that statement could be misconstrued. Despite where his fingers lay there is nothing sexual about his touch, not yet anyway, give him time to wake and for thought to dictate his actions. For now it's all about love, a ritual of longing and devotion.

Since Bobby's known about her pregnancy his hands have developed a fascination with her abdomen. His hand protectively rests there when idle. Though he cannot feel the baby yet she's sure he'll be the one to know the first moment you can. She smiles thinking there'll be no need for sonograms, a father's loving hand will know all there is to know.

Every morning she wakes to it's pressure and warmth. His thumb resting against her navel, his fingers spanning wide, their tips creeping below her waistband. If she wakes him with just the right kiss he can easily be persuaded to move it ... lower. She feels a steady throbbing arise at the mere thought and turns her face to his. Pressing her mouth to him she nibbles on his lips. It takes a while but eventually his lips respond, then a sleepy tongue seeks entrance. No sooner has it brushed against hers then she feels an unwelcome jolt.

Although her reaction is immediate she barely makes it to the bathroom in time. Bobby is there beside her before she knows it. Gathering her hair from off her face, tying it then offering her a wet cloth. "I guess it was too much to expect this would never happen" she says wiping her brow.

"Ah so it's pregnancy and not my morning breath that's to blame" he jokes rubbing her back.

She chuckles and warns "Don't make me laugh" as she reaches up for the hand which is gladly given.

His thumb rubs across her wrist and he tentatively asks "You ok?"

"Yeah" she sighs, resting back against the wall, "I'm fine."

After a while when the color seems to have returned to her face he asks "You hungry? I could make us some eggs." Her face turns green and he instantly regrets it as he watches her body's reaction. Grimacing and rubbing her back he says "Sorry ... Bad joke."

"Ugh my mouth feels horrible" she moans as she leans against the wall again.

Immediately he gets her toothbrush and passes it to her. She looks at it and then him "You've forgotten something."

"No dry first then if your stomach doesn't react try some water and if it copes with that you can have paste."

She looks up at him curious but he turns and busies himself at the basin. He looks across at her questioning face then with a sigh and a pained expression says, "Chemo trick of my Mom's."

She smiles at him, grateful for the advice and the admission. He pours her a cup of water then walks to her side. They nod at one another. I'm ok, you're ok, we're ok.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 50

Bobby enters the bedroom and suddenly stops. From this vantage point he can see Lindsay, sans clothes, preparing for her bath. His eyes are automatically drawn to her body. Previously had he been asked what a pregnant woman looked like all he'd know to say was a big belly. He'd even admit almost his first instinct on hearing the news was to check for signs of a bulge. He's fascinated by the changes in her, by the fact there's a life growing inside that he played a part in creating. .

As there is nothing tangible for him to hold onto yet it's all still so hard to believe. Even the changes in her body don't scream out baby on board, not to him anyway. At least not in the way he'd expected. There is certainly no bulge, if anything her stomach is flatter than it was before. She's lost weight which is hardly surprising since food no longer agrees with her. Actually a lot of things don't agree with her. Her sense of smell has become more acute causing some rather dramatic reactions. Bobby had to change cologne because Lindsay threw up every time he approached her. That was a humbling experience but fortunately they quickly realized the cause. Changing colognes was not a big deal to him but she laments the loss of one of her favorite nasal sensations. He said he'd stop bathing altogether if she thought that would suit her better. She assured him she didn't think that would be necessary.

Hiding in the shadows he watches her now. Once upon a time he would have known for sure he was welcome to join her, now nothing is certain. At times they seem on a roller coaster with both barely holding on. He never knows from one minute to the next if he's the love of her life or the bane of her existence. She hates how moody she's become and finds little consolation in the fact it is a by product of pregnancy and therefore something she has no control over. Control has always been important to her. Lately she has been fearing that her control is slipping away, taking with it other tenets: compassion, reason and strength, leaving behind a woman she barely recognizes as herself.

Bobby feels a little guilty watching her when she's unaware but he wants to see her. He'd be open about it if he could guarantee tonight she wanted to be seen. She turns and his eyes survey her waist. His hands can span her sides now and his fingertips almost meet in the middle a fact that pleases her more than him. She laments it's destined to change. Her small waist barely warrants a second thought from him as he finds another new facet of her body far more intriguing.

Lindsay's breasts seem to get bigger everyday and Bobby likes to go to a considerable effort to prove that theory. Her new body turns him on to such an extent, seeing her before him like this, he can barely think straight. At first she felt disheartened by his enthusiasm as if previously he'd thought she'd been lacking but he assured her that wasn't the case. It isn't so much the new dimensions but the implication behind them that most blows his mind. Not that he doesn't like the dimensions too.

Last night as they lay in bed he'd teased her that women pay a lot of money for breast enlargements but she only had to sleep with him to get them. Her reply, as she turned her back to him, was if breast enhancement had been her objective then there was no need to have sex with him anymore. This was an opinion he was compelled to prove wrong. He does believe he put up a very convincing argument if the contented expression on her face as she drifted off to sleep was any indication.

Watching her now he'd be quite happy to debate it with her again but she's been quiet tonight and he doesn't feel it's right to try. Lindsay moves out of his sight and he hears the water ripple as she slides into the tub. 'Shows over' he thinks sadly. He's about to move from his perch against the door frame when he hears a much welcomed purr "If you bring me a cold drink I may even let you join me."

Bobby doesn't have to be told twice.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 63

'It's the end of an era' Bobby thinks as the car comes to a stop. From now on they'll be thought of as Bobby and Lindsay, parents to be. As proud as he is of that, he's enjoyed keeping it secret. At first he wanted to tell everyone, but now he's content with the silence, although he's almost let it slip a few times. It's the first time in a long time they've had anything that is just between them. Once it becomes known their business becomes everyone's business. When a child is involved people feel they have a right to know everything and everyone knows best what should be done. So much of their relationship is played out in public that having something that only they know has been a thrill. Part of him wants to shout the news from the rooftops but part of him wants to keep the secret still. He feels a pang of regret that they are here now for dinner at Helen's with an announcement to be made.

He sighs and looks across at Lindsay planning to ask if she's ready to go in. Their eyes meet and he sees his own desires reflected in hers. No words need to be spoken. A whole conversation is carried out with a look and a nod. A night spent among friends announcing their news or a night spent in each others arms coveting their secret. Bobby reaches for the ignition as Lindsay reaches for her cell phone. He holds in his chuckle as she offers the lamest of excuses but the moment she disconnects he laughs loudly "You're a hopeless liar."

"Well next time I'll do the driving and you deceive our friends" she retorts.

Bobby's forced to pull the car over and kiss her with delight at her belief there'll be a next time. That her passion is as strong as his always amazes him. That she'd willingly drop everything now and in the future just to be with him is a fact he finds little short of miraculous. It's these moments that remind him why he so loves this woman by his side.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 79

Lindsay stands letting the water pour over her but she barely notices it. Her mind is churning going over and over the points she needs to make in her cross today. She's up against a seasoned campaigner and unless she shakes him their client doesn't stand a chance. They've worked so long and hard on it and now it's all up to her. She's not sure how much of today's nausea is pregnancy related and how much is nerves. She can't let them down she just can't. Her hand skims over her abdomen thinking about her own child. It all becomes that much more crucial when she envisions the life she's carrying. Children should never have to suffer as her clients have done. She needs to get him with her cross or their suffering will have been in vain.

Bobby opening the shower curtain startles Lindsay out of her musings. His face is pure concern when he asks "You ok?" She mumbles a reply clueing him into the fact it's her mind not her body causing today's delay. His eyes, compassionate and secure, never leave hers. His query brings voice to her morning's mantra.

"I've got to get him Bobby if I don't get him..."

Bobby doesn't allow her to continue in doubt stopping her by voicing his belief "You will." When her responding look is one of uncertainty he voices it again, more insistently, "You will!"

The certainty in his eyes assures her. She draws from them strength and nods her renewed belief. It's only then he allows his eyes to drop and scan her naked body. The corners of his mouth draw up as he says "Especially if you turn up looking like that." She laughs and her hand pulls on the open collar of his shirt until his lips are close enough for her to thank him for reviving her joy.

A quick kiss and then Bobby backs away allowing Lindsay to climb from the tub. Watching her he moves into protective mode, questioning her on her food intake, her strength, her stress levels. Groaning she wraps the towel around her and leaves the room. Just because she knows he's doing it to help get her psyched for court doesn't mean she has to appreciate it. Well she does but that doesn't stop her from complaining.

They continue to bicker and banter as she gets ready for work and it's not until she climbs into the car that she realises she hasn't worried about her cross examination for over half an hour. Bobby's grin tells her he knows her thoughts.

"Just drive!" she grumbles and is delighted with his answering laugh.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 85

Bobby's head is churning, worrying about the implications of Lindsay's outburst. He doesn't think it's pregnancy. She was nauseous this morning but no more so than usual. Something definitely has her upset though. The way she pounced on Jimmy and her embittered "She should be shot" are not examples of normal Lindsay behaviour. He saw the looks exchanged around the conference table after that and quickly changed the subject to get the attention off of her. His own attention was harder to shake though, his thoughts were constantly returning to her, wondering what has upset her so. As the meeting finishes up Bobby says "Lindsay, in my office."

She looks up but too late to meet his eye. He's already out the door and walking away so she gets up and follows him. He stands in the doorway and closes the door behind her after she enters.

"What's wrong?" they ask simultaneously.

Smiling she motions for him to go first and he asks "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, why?"

"You were acting a little aggressive in there."

"What? I was not!"

"You bit Jimmy's head off and told him his client should be shot ... that's normal behavior for you?"

Lindsay grimaces and turns away walking towards the couch "I'll apologize to Jimmy."

"Lindsay I'm not worried about Jimmy. Are you ok?"

"It just ... it made me so mad. How can a woman have so little compassion ... 8 months pregnant Bobby and she's smoking crack ... it's insane!" Her voice raises as she speaks her anger escalating again.

"Calm down "

"I wont calm down! Bobby have you ever seen a crack baby? Do you have any idea what a painful..."

He walks towards her grabbing her hand. "Hey stop it!" She looks away from him and he tugs gently on her hand drawing her attention back to him "What's really wrong?"

"I'm scared" she says quietly.

"Of what?"

"Bobby I'm so close to the end of the first trimester now and ..." she looks down.

"What? Tell me?" he steps closer forcing himself into her field of vision.

"The likelihood of going full term increases after that and ... I'm afraid to prematurely believe it's going to work out. I'm afraid the moment I do and let my guard down something will go wrong and so when I hear of someone whose baby has fought 8 months to stay alive so callously put it at risk like that ... it's ... it's incomprehensible Bobby and I ... I just saw red ... I'll apologize to Jimmy."

He runs his hands along her arms soothingly and she looks up at his face. She can tell she has surprised and unnerved him. She didn't mean to make him fearful too. His optimism has soothed her for so long she'd hate for him to lose it. Especially now, with Scott's debacle, he needs something good to hold onto. She drops her head against his chest and as his arms encircle her as she says "I'm sorry Bobby."

"Shhhh it's ok ... our baby's fine Linds nothing's going to go wrong." She nods but no where near convincingly enough for him. He moves away enough to be able to look at her face "Remember what our baby is Lindsay?"

"What's that?"

"Half you and half me which means it will be so damn stubborn nothing will make it budge. It will be sticking around to torment us in our old age just you wait and see."

She smiles and returns to his arms "I hope so"

"Everything will be ok Linds" he promises rocking her gently, hoping it's a promise he can deliver.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 90

With an air of despondency Bobby sat on the end of the bed, his elbows resting on his knees and his head sunk into his hands. He found it hard to believe it had come to this. Lindsay was slowly driving him insane. He'd tried everything but no matter what he said he merely dug himself a bigger hole to fall into. In the end the only choice he felt he had left was to leave. So here he is hiding out in the bedroom feeling for all the world like a coward.

Well if he's here he may as well make it an early night he decides and rises to change. He's returned from the bathroom and is setting the alarm when he senses her presence. He decides it's probably the ten foot ball of 'Bobby's an insensitive jerk' air she carries with her everywhere at the moment that alerted him of her arrival. Her aura has a way of sucking all the life out of a room and his body tenses instinctively as she approaches.

Lindsay watches him and thinks if he could always look like this then maybe she could handle living with him. He does have a nice back and he fills out a pair of black silk boxers well. His dark hair starkly contrasts the smooth pale skin of his neck and beckons her to slide her fingers through it. Just as those silk clad cheeks tempt her fingers to cup and knead. She can't touch him though as then he'd turn and she have to contend with his face. Those know it all eyes and that smirking mouth. She sighs and shakes her head. She notices he's supposedly still checking the alarm and knows he just doesn't want to turn and meet her eyes. Guilt washes over her. How did they get this way?

"Bobby" she says taking a step into the room determined to heal this rift.

"What?" he replies and the animosity she hears re-ignites her wrath.

"Forget it!" she storms into the bathroom slamming the door.

He turns around in time to see her immediately open the door again.

"No I wont forget it. Bobby we need to talk."

'Here we go' he thinks and walks back to the foot of the bed and sits ready for lecture number 203 of the day.

"I just thought ... I thought this would make us happy" she says.

"I am happy" he snaps back. His manner, his tone, his whole demeanor screaming otherwise. He doesn't mean to snap at her but when you've been on the defensive for so long it's hard to let your guard down.

Lindsay looks down at him wondering why she bothers. His eyes narrow as he looks back up at her. She snarls, "Well you've got a hell of a way of showing it" and returns to the bathroom.

Bobby flops back on the bed and stares at the ceiling wishing somewhere up there was written the dealing with Lindsay code. He knows some days he's as much to blame as her but today he can honestly say he thinks he's innocent. All he's done all night is try and help but no matter what he said or did it was the wrong thing. He's been considerate. Hell for him he's been angelic but it has made no difference. He's public enemy number one and just needs to learn to live with it.

He hears her return to the room but doesn't make a move to acknowledge it. Nope the ceiling is just way too fascinating for him to drag his eyes away from, even for Lindsay. He feels her hand brush against his hip and his eyes close under the weight of the realization she's going to insist on getting his attention. Her fingers play with the edge of the leg band of his boxers. As she rubs it back and forth her nails lightly tickle his thigh. He expects her to speak but she doesn't. The only sound in the room is their breathing.

Bobby turns his head and looks at her. Her eyes are focused on the actions of her fingers and he moves his hand to still hers. She looks at him then and sighs at what she perceives as rejection. He sees genuine contrition behind her anger and feels that maybe this time they will actually talk. He allows his own manner to relax, determined not to be confrontational. He can do supportive, he's been practicing.

She steps forward and sits beside him on the bed. He stays where he is and watches the tension play over her back.

"Lindsay" he says quietly, hoping to kick start some form of resolution.

"Please don't speak" she replies and he's surprised to hear despair in her tone.

His hands raise from the mattress and drop again in a questioning gesture but with her back to him she doesn't see it. It was more instinctive then communicative anyway. He returns to perusing the ceiling sure in the knowledge nothing is going to happen under his terms so he may as well wait to see what hers are. Sure enough he soon hears her mumble "I hate this"

"What?" he asks gently.

Lindsay stands and Bobby fears his one word has set her off again but she merely turns to look at him. She looks so .... he doesn't know what it is she looks like but it's not his Lindsay.

"Can I ... Bobby can I say something ... hateful ... without you getting hurt?"

He sits up and opens his mouth but she presses her fingers against his lips. 'Oh that's right no talking' he remembers. He nods at her and lets his face tell her what his voice isn't allowed to.

"I'm ... I'm going insane Bobby I swear it ... and ... and you're the cause. Every time you speak it just grates on me and ... what's worse is I know you're not really to blame. It's me ... I'm moody and annoyed and ... I know I'm being unreasonable but I just can't seem to stop myself. I hate this."

He reaches out and takes her hand encouraging her to sit back down to the bed with him.

"I hate that I'm moody and I hate that I'm taking it out on you and I hate myself..."

He pulls on her so she's lying flat and, turning to face her, hovers over her and says "Enough! That's where I draw the line Lindsay. Take it out on me I don't care, hate me all you want but don't start hating yourself."

"I don't hate you."

"It feels like it sometimes."

"I know and I'm sorry."

"It's ok. Don't be sorry."

"It's not ok. Bobby you wouldn't even look at me before."

"That was my mistake I should have been more..."

Lindsay remembers exactly why he's driving her insane. She feels patronized when he treats her like this, like she can do no wrong and he has to be the one making all the sacrifices because she's pregnant and can't be expected to act normally.

"For God's sake Bobby!" she says trying to push him away.

He sits up "I give up!"

Turning to look accusingly at her he sees anxiety on her face "That's what I'm afraid of" she says so sadly he relents and lays back down with her.

"What do you want from me?" he asks stroking her hair..

"If I knew that do you think I'd be making us both so miserable."

"You're not making ..."

"Bobby I love you but you're driving me insane!"

He moves his arm so he's trapping her under him and caresses her cheek trying to remove some of the tension there. "The feelings mutual" he whispers.

They look at one another tentatively. Eyes trying to interpret what minds cannot understand. Her hand raises and cups the back of his neck drawing his lips to hers. He's surprised she's kissing him he certainly saw no desire to do so in her look. Acrimony yes arousal no. But that this kiss is designed to arouse is without doubt. He knows her kisses and his body definitely recognizes this one. If this kiss doesn't prove that no matter how well he knows her she'll always be a mystery to him nothing would. He'd been assuming he'd end up on the couch tonight not in her arms. He worries it's only guilt making her do this and pulls out of the kiss.

"Are you sure you wants this?" he asks, his eyes unconsciously telegraphing how much he does.

"Yes!"

Her reply sets him in motion. His kisses travel over her jaw, down her neck and across her chest. His hands actively explore the body that monopolises his dreams.

"Bobby I ... I'm so frustrated" he hears and smiles.

Rising off her he sits and his hands reach under her nightie and draw her underwear down "I can help with that" he promises in his huskiest tone. He knows what that tone does to her.

To his disappointment she says "No not like that" as she kicks the material away. "Come back up here."

He moves back up the bed fearing once again he's read her wrong. When her arms encircle him he feels encouraged to continue what he had been doing. She seemed to like his kisses before so he zeroes in on her neck again.

"What I meant was ... I'm ... I've got ..."

He stops kissing her neck and pulls away to look at her. When she hesitates before continuing he encouragingly asks "What?"

"I'm frustrated .. I ... I need to ... I want control over something ... I feel ... I want to be aggressive."

His eyes darken and with the slack jawed look on his face she fears he's about to drool on her. The insistent prod against her thigh alerts her that someone is very interested in what she just said. He leans more fully against her and with a mischievous grin asks "Are you going to hurt me?"

'Please please please' she thinks she sees his eyes say. Proof to her he has no idea how much pent up emotion she really feels. There is so much broiling inside her she's a little afraid of how far she might go but he's obviously underestimating how she feels. 'Time to show him' she thinks. Pushing him off her she rises to her knees and says "Not intentionally."

He lays back still grinning up at her. She leans over him and presses her lips against his. She pushes his hands to rest on the mattress by his head after he tries to touch her. Holding them there she kisses him furiously. His moan reverberates through her. She can feel his excitement in the heat radiating off his body. She stops seconds before stealing his last breath and smiles as he gasps for air when his mouth is released. He's not so cocky anymore. Behind the arousal in his eyes she sees the realization dawn that he may well be in trouble.

Moving away from him her hands grip the waistband of his boxers. "These have got to go" she says and barely gives him time to raise his hips before she drags them off. She looks immeasurably pleased with his startled reaction and before he's managed to compose a response she straddles his hips and, lowering herself, sheaths him in her warmth.

"Good gawwwwd" he groans as his body expresses its startled response. He has no objection to foregoing foreplay but this is like turning up to an audition and having the curtains open onto an opening night crowd. He might be taken by surprise but the show is definitely going on. As he wills his body not to betray him yet he can hear his heart beating furiously and realises his eyes are screwed tightly shut.

Opening them he looks at her amused eyes. 'Payback' he thinks and reaches out to touch her but she grips his wrists and signalling with her eyes towards the headboard says "Keep them there."

Being the obedient boy he is he grips the spindles of the headboard and keeps his eyes glued to her. He's never seen her like this before and he's fascinated. She's completely still and just watching him. Bobby suspects she's waiting for him to misbehave so he stubbornly doesn't. Her hands move from their resting place on her thighs to his abdomen. Slowly softly she trails the backs of her fingers up his sides sending a barrage of sensation through his body. She continues trailing her fingers across his skin until the tingling tension is almost unbearable. That such a soft caress can so ignite him amazes and torments him Adding to his sweet torture is the fact apart from her hands she isn't moving.

He feels on fire, trapped in her heat, consumed by it. He feels it permeating into him, swelling him to the point where he fears if she doesn't move soon he's going to explode. She's surrounding him, bathing him in heat. She's taken him into her, owns him now and shows no sign of ever letting him go. As much as he's quite happy to never leave he needs to move. His body cries out for it and he can't hold back anymore and keep his sanity. He wants to buck underneath her. He needs friction before the pleasure crosses the line into pain. It feels so good it's too good and he fears he's one second away from unbearable.

The chant of 'have to move have to move have to move' has been increasing in fervency throughout his body and he moans desperately "Lindsay!"

Her hands still, then move to flatten against his hips. Resting there they balance her and subdue him. He understands their message; she's in control, he's not to move, this is her show. If it will get him what he wants he won't argue. Slowly she rises until he almost slips from her. Her snail like pace after such a long anticipation intensifies the sensation along every inch of him. The cool air on his skin after such prolonged heat is almost enough to make him lose it completely.

Again his eyes slam shut of their own accord and as his breath catches in his chest he thinks 'Ohgodthisisjusttoogood!' He waits for her to slam back down again knowing when she does he'll be buried so deep he'll never find his way back out. Right now he can't imagine ever wanting to be out though. In fact he wants back in but what's taking her so long. His eyes open and as if she was waiting for just that she begins to move again.

Lindsay lowers herself just as slowly as she'd earlier raised and Bobby lets out a long groan that had he been able to form words may have been Ohgodyou'regoingtokillme.

Lindsay continues this excruciating pace. Taking what to Bobby's fevered mind feels like five minute to raise and five minutes to fall. All he knows is it is tortuously exhilarating and he needs to be able to move within her. His body is crying out with the need to thrust up into her. To grab her hips and slam her down against him. The pace is killing him he needs so much more. He needs her to speed up before he goes insane.

Bobby can hear someone begging and wonders if it's really him The longer she continues the more out of control his body feels until he's frantic, desperate to act, wanting it to stop, wanting it to never end, out of his mind with sensations and emotions he can't express and becoming delirious with the need to act and for release.

Lindsay had no idea when she started this that she would make him wait so long but then she had no idea this pace would feel so good to her. It may be tortuous for him but for her it's phenomenal. She can feel each nerve ending being stimulated as he slides through her, the slow motion heightening her sensitivity until her body screams and burns, until she believes she can feel each molecule drawing apart ready to explode and send her into the ether.

As if in sympathy with the pace she's set she feels a bead of sweat slowly travel down her body, through the valley between her breasts, down down the path Bobby's hands would take if she hadn't forbid their use. It reminds her of her love to be touched and she looks at him almost as if she'd forgotten he was there. His head is thrashing against the sheets, his white knuckles gripping the spindles, his mouth begging, half in silence half in words for her to stop, to continue, to help, for more, faster, harder, more. 'Oh he's ready' she thinks and puts her final plan into play.

Just when Bobby thinks the torture can't get any worse Lindsay's body clenches gripping him tighter as she raises again. It feels like his whole life is being drawn up out of him as she moves. He hears a plaintive cry and pities the guy who sounds as if he's dying but oh what a way to go! Barely able to focus he looks up at her and is surprised to see her looming closer as she slides back down. Her body braces over his. Her hands no longer staying his hips but resting besides his head. The heat and pressure as they lay chest to chest is so welcomed. He wants to touch her. He wants to wrap his arms around her and lose all his pent up emotions in her. Her breath warms a path along his neck as she moves to whisper in his ear. He hears her say "Do it" and loses all ability to think.

Flipping them he's pounding into her seeking the release he'd so long desired before he even knows he's moved. His body is in charge now, fully. His mind focussed only on how incredible it feels and how much more he wants to feel. No thoughts are put into his actions just a primitive instinctual quest for pleasure. When he feels her muscles clenching around him of their own accord and her body buck under his as she murmurs his name he erupts. His body exploding, his mind pummelled with sensation while his hips continue to thrust. Shock waves ripple through him as he feels her hands urging him on, drawing him closer, exalting him.

Collapsed over her he suspects it may have been three days before he found the strength to gather her to him and roll over. He'd talk, he'd kiss her, he'd do something if only he could get a single muscle in his body to respond. He feels her fingers running through his hair and opens his eyes seeing concern on her face. He summons all his energy and smiles at her and is pleased at the relief that washes over her face. She lays against his chest and he croakely says "My God Lindsay what was that?"

She giggles nervously and raises to look at him again. Her hand cups his cheek as she asks "Are you ok?"

"Depends" he says "Am I still in one piece?" Apart from the joy of having her against him he really can't feel a thing. Just a heavy, although wonderful, lethargy.

"You don't see me anymore Bobby" she quietly says leaving Bobby wondering if he lost some brain cells or whether she is just not making sense.

She's leaning over him and looking deep into his eyes. He feels she's got him right where she wants him; too tired to move and too stunned to comment. All he can do is stare back. Disappointed by his silence Lindsay turns and sits up.

Feeling her draw away both physically and emotionally Bobby grabs onto her arm. She turns back to look at him and he sees tears in her eyes. "I just ..." he starts to say but doesn't know how to continue. He sits up and while doing so considers what she said. He doesn't understand it one bit. How could she say he doesn't see her? He delights in looking at her. Watching the changes in her body, the joy in her eyes, the excitement and incredulity that he knows equals if not surpasses his own. He looks over at her and says "I don't know what you mean by that."

"You only see ... " she sighs torn between saying it and risking getting him mad at her or just learning to live with it.

"Lindsay" he pleads.

She looks at him. Sees in his eyes the confusion he feels, knows if she can ever make him understand her it's now. She moves towards him, kneels over him and again straddles his thighs although the purpose this time is so their eyes are level. His hands hesitantly raise then rest on her thighs. 'I'm here, I'm listening, don't run away' is the message they send. She quietly begins to speak.

"You don't see me ... you only see this person you think I am now ...'Pregnant Lindsay' ... but that's not who I am. I'm pregnant Bobby but I'm still me. I want you to see me. I miss the way you used to look at me, the way you'd touch me, hold me, make love to me ... You never lose control anymore. You're always so cautious, so gentle, protective and ... I'm still here but you don't see me."

"That's what this was? You wanted me to see you?"

"No I wanted you to forget me."

"What!"

"I wanted you to forget who you think I am, forget everything and just be you. I wanted to see you ... to see how you really feel without you holding back. I wanted to feel like you want me."

"Lindsay you know I do."

"I need you to trust me Bobby."

"I do!"

"No you don't. I tell you everything is fine and you still hold back. I need you to believe if I say it's good it is good. If I say I want it I do want it. I'm pregnant ... I'm not fragile."

Bobby nods hearing what she's saying but feeling it's impossible for him to do as she asks. He can't not look at her in awe, in adoration and with a fierce desire to protect her, it's how he feels and he can't change that. The longing in her eyes though tells him he has to try. Then he realises it's not that she doesn't want him to feel those things but that she needs to know he feels them and more. As well as his pride she wants his passion. He has to let himself give in to his emotions, he has to let her see how strongly he feels.

Lindsay sees her message has got through and decides to let him off the hook a little. She lays down and holds her arms out to him. He slides down the bed and lays beside her drawing her body back against his. His hands slide over her back as her cheek comes to rest on his chest.

"Tonight felt wonderful Bobby"

"Incredible"

"Tell me how it felt"

He rolls them over and looks down at her questioning face. How can he put into words what she did to him? "It was ... it was like every breath would be my last but I wanted to take it anyway..." her smile tells him he's doing well so he continues "it was agonizing, it was frustrating but it was exhilarating. I didn't know what I wanted more ... for it to never end or for it to stop all I knew was I wanted you."

Lindsay pulls him down so she can kiss him then rolls them so she's on top again. She slides off him and plays her fingers across his chest while speaking quietly into his ear.

"Bobby how you felt ... every inch of you crying out for relief ... frustrated to the point of ... that's how I feel sometimes ... only ... only for me there is nothing I can do to relieve it. Does that make any sense to you?"

"Tell me what I can do to help?" he asks turning to her.

"Bobby there isn't really anything you can do. Just be supportive ... but not too supportive."

"That clears things up so much Lindsay,"

She laughs and raises up on her elbow. "Tonight you were too much, cloyingly so. I was feeling trapped and you ... God you were so persistent and so smothering ... Every time I turned around you were there when all I really wanted was space."

"You should have told me."

"I did but you were so busy trying to fix everything you weren't listening ... sometimes the supportive thing to do is to walk away."

"Yeah but then you miss me and come looking for me."

"Actually I was just tired and ready for bed."

"Liar!"

She giggles and relaxes against his chest. "You're trying too hard Bobby. Don't try and be perfect because Perfect Bobby is a pain in the ass I'd much rather have you."

"Perfect Bobby?" he laughs "And who am I? Flawed Bobby?"

Lindsay's fingers run over his face, rasping through the stubble they encounter there. Her eyes become entranced watching their journey and her answer is lost before she's thought to voice it. Sensing her mind wandering Bobby moves his head enough to cause her fingers to brush against his mouth. Capturing a finger lightly between his teeth he draws her attention back to him. When she looks at him in momentary confusion he asks "Who am I?"

Remembering his earlier question she smiles and lowers her mouth to his. "You're my Bobby" she whispers as their lips touch.

They share long languid kisses, little movements, little touches, licks and nibbles, shared murmurs and breaths. Lindsay pulls away so she can look at him and Bobby sees the shutters slowly closing over her eyes.

"Let's get some sleep" he says and without speaking she sidles against him and her breathing evens out almost immediately. Although she has given him a lot to think about, his body has other plans and he quickly follows her into sleep.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 94

"Don't touch!" Lindsay hisses for the fourth time in as many minutes. She figures she should be grateful Bobby is giving her a taste of what parenthood is like but she isn't. Their technician is running late, she needs to pee ... badly, and Bobby is annoying her. She knows it's nervous excitement, and she loves him for it, she just wishes he wasn't so painful when he's being adorable. He sits in the technicians chair and again reaches out for the equipment. "Bobby!" she warns but he ignores her. Picking up the speculum he talks to it as if it's a microphone and he's a sporting commentator "Yes folks we have the formidable Lindsay Dole laid out before us now..."

"You do realize where that goes?" she asks and watches as comprehension sinks in. The look of horror on his face as he puts it back before shooting out of the chair and across the room is worth the fact she almost wets herself laughing.

Finally the technician enters the room. Bobby's guilt ridden face and deer in headlights look garners a second glance from her and she smiles thinking you can never be sure of the reaction of an expectant dad. He hovers as far away as possible. Lindsay recognizes the squeamish look on his face as the gel is spread over her stomach. She can almost hear his cry of 'too much information.' The technician noticing the direction of Lindsay's gaze turns to Bobby and says "You won't have much of a view from over there dad."

Bobby's eyes light up at the title and with a smile he walks towards Lindsay's outstretched hand. He rests his chin on the pillow beside her. She watches him grow with pride as they listen to their baby's heartbeat. His face scrunches in concentration as he tries to decipher which glob on the screen is his child. When he finally recognizes an outstretched foot without being prompted he feels happier then he ever remembers feeling. He kisses her there and then, witnesses be damned, and that act alone proves to her more than any words could how much this child means to him.

Five printed pictures later and with a video in hand Bobby is a walking talking ball of energy as they walk towards their car. "God that was incredible!" he says for perhaps the 5th time "The heart was beating, you could see it on the screen, amazing! You should have seen ..."

"Bobby I was there!" Lindsay reminds him and he laughs.

They reach the car and he turns and stands before her. His eyes so vibrant so alive. He kisses her tenderly, reverently, his hands smoothing down her arms. One snakes in to rest where their child lays. "We just saw our baby" he says awed.

Lindsay nods, "Yeah" she says softly. No words she can come up with are powerful enough to express how she feels. She doesn't need to tell him though. He knows.

"Let's go home" Bobby says and Lindsay smiles.

They'd had plans for the day. They'd intended to take advantage of the fact that neither was working this beautiful spring afternoon and really make a day of it. She's quite happy to forgo that idea though as she's sure they can make some wonderful memories at home too.

"Ok" she says and the pleasure that flashes across his face tells her she made the right decision.

The drive home is an experience. Lindsay doesn't think she's ever seen Bobby this animated. He hasn't stopped talking since the sonogram finished, he's normal controlled demeanor is lost in a body that can't keep still and his smile is blinding. As he pulls up outside their apartment he looks at her, she looks at him and they laugh. The emotions coursing through them are too many and too intense and they need release.

By the time they reach the apartment door clothes are already being shed. She opens the door and feels herself being rushed through it then suddenly her back is against it and the vibrations as it slams shut behind her set her body on fire. Or maybe that's Bobby's hands and mouth doing that. She tugs on his shirt until she's managed to get it untucked and her hands underneath. He's just as desperate for the feel of skin and the sound of a button hitting the floor alerts her to how fevered his actions are. She pushes him away enough to move her body away from the door and start heading in the direction of their bedroom.

His hands and lips stay in contact with her until the jacket she's attempted to remove from him tangles his arms. He shrugs it off quickly, followed by the t-shirt that has become bunched around his chest. Leaving them behind without a second thought. The predatory look in his eye as he follows her down the hallway sends a rush of heat through her. Her own shirt drags along the floor. She managed to remove one arm but the other hand holds the precious pictures and video. She cannot let them go, they're too beloved to merely be dropped to the floor. As her legs hit the bed and she falls back she finally allows her fingers to release their grasp. He's joined her in a heartbeat, their lips and limbs a tangle of desire. Clothes are quickly discarded and they make love amidst the scattered images of the fruits of their love.

Later they order takeout and watch their new favorite video before making love again. Bobby's passion has been re-ignited. Lindsay's unsure whether it's because he's taken notice of her plea from last week or, through watching the strong rhythmic heartbeat of their child, he's come to realise she contains strength not fragility. Either way she is more than pleased with the result.

"I'll never forget today" he whispers to her as they lay in bed that night.

"Me neither" she replies "I've never wanted to pee so badly in all my life"

It's a wonder the neighbours didn't call the authorities after the frantic shriek that soon ensued from the room but maybe the laughter that followed was their saving grace.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 103

"How's flipper doing?" Bobby asks walking into the kitchen.

Lindsay looks up from her seat at the table and laughs "What have you been smoking?"

He kisses her and whispers "I'm high on life" then leans back against the countertop.

"Flipper?" she asks.

"Well we can't just keep calling it 'it'. As you wouldn't let us find out what 'it' was we can't use he or she so we have to call it something."

"And the best you could come up with is flipper?"

"Well what do we know about it except it makes your stomach flip."

She rolls her eyes. "A name is a cute idea Bobby but I'm not calling my baby flipper."

"Not even for me?"

She looks up at him and is pleased to see only mischief in his eyes. Thank goodness she was afraid he may have had his heart set on it. "Not even for you" she says.

"I'm devastated" he mumbles.

Lindsay rises from the table and sliding her hands up his arms says "Let me make it up to you."

Devastated would not be an acceptable adjective to describe Bobby's reaction.

YYYYYYYYY

Day 111

He hears a startled cry of "Bobby!" and runs to Lindsay's side. She's standing in the bedroom, a model of concentration, with her hand clutching her belly.

"Oh God! What's wrong?" Bobby asks beginning to panic but she looks up at him and beams.

"He moved?"

"He?"

"It .. her ... him ... whatever. Bobby I felt movement!"

"Did you have beans for lunch?" he teases walking forwards and laying his hand beside hers. She laughs long and loud alerting him to just how overjoyed she feels. Normally that type of comment would have been met with either a groan or a swat.

He moves to stand behind her, cradling her body with his. Their staggered hands cover every inch of her abdomen. She rests her head back against his shoulder, his breaths puffing by her ear. They are silent, faces turned to one another eyes expectant and anticipatory but nothing happens. He lowers his mouth to her ear and whispers "I think your shriek scared him off."

Lindsay giggles, too euphoric to take any offence. She's felt life inside of her. Felt the proof of the rewards of their love. Rubbing his thumbs softly against her skin Bobby soothingly says "It's ok your mommy isn't as crazy as you might think ... I kinda like her and I know you will too ... so come say hello ... it's safe daddy's here now."

Lindsay laughs again and Bobby smiles never having had it so easy. Her laugh is cut short by another flutter and she doesn't have to ask if he felt it too it's written all over his face. He lets go and moving to stand in front of her drops to his knees. His cheek rests where his hands had been. She runs her hands through his hair.

"Can you hear anything?" she asks curious.

"Um ... hang on ..." an awed "yeah!" fills the room.

"Really?" her fingers still. "What..." she begins to ask but he motions for her to be silent.

He listens intently then quietly, thoughtfully says, "It sounds like ... he's complaining about no TV"

She pushes his head away but his hold on her is too tight for it to have an effect. Chuckling, his cheek resumes its place against her, her hand cradles it there.

YYYYYYYYY