Onera walks silently and respectfully through the woods, enjoying the peaceful serenity that is only broken by the call of the animal-residents.
Faint at first, the sound of the river calls to her and fills her with restless joy. Lakota had asked them to think on if they want to be guardians or travelers, and Onera wants to be a traveler-- like the river she so loves.
She'd often floated in the river as a child and let it carry her for a while, but she'd secretly always wanted to float along as far as it would take her and see what was at the river's end. Some days she'd let the river carry her farther than others, but always she'd paddle back to shore and return home before her parents could worry about her.
Onera steps through the trees to see the spirit-version of her childhood river before her. This is where she has chosen to call to Stag to be their pack-totem. Stag is the chief of all forests, and the river puts her in the center of his realm.
She steps into the river-- her crinos-form making it easier for her to wade into the river without losing her footing against the strong current. She forces her way to the center of the river, and then squats down so the current pushes against her back and head to spill down over her shoulders. It feels refreshing and clean, and she closes her eyes and lets her breathing slow until she feels her head start to grow lighter and more disconnected.
She opens her eyes and finds that she is back in her village, and a little child again. She's standing beside her father Watenake. Though he has a limp and hasn't been a warrior since before her birth, he is still lean and strong and an expert woodsman-- one of the best in the village. She looks up at him and smiles, and he smiles down at her and motions for her to follow him.
She follows him into the woods, and they move deeper and deeper into the trees. At one point they walk through a shaft of sunlight and Onera squints against the brightness. After she steps through it she looks around and notices that her father is missing. Panic fills her and she calls his name over and over again. She remembers his lesson that she should stay where she is if she becomes separated from him in the woods, and so she obeys and stands motionless.
Suddenly there is a crashing-noise and it comes closer and closer, snuffling and making awful noises. It bursts into view-- a huge wyrm-creature!! She lets out a scream, and suddenly her father appears beside her. He smiles at her, and then his face goes stern and serious and he charges at the wyrm-creature. As he runs, Onera notices that his limp is gone. And then suddenly her father leaps forward and shimmers and his form changes into that of the great Stag.
Stag rams into the wyrm-creature with his great, sharp antlers, and then suddenly everything around Onera disappears and she's back in the village and it's nightime. She's 16 years old again, and sharing a fire with Elder Chipowata, her teacher. He's praising her about what a calm temperment she has, and how it will be her greatest asset in bringing peace to conflict.
She beams with happiness at this great compliment, and listens carefully as he begins their lesson for the night. As Chipowata speaks, Onera watches his eyes and she is almost overwhelmed with the wisdom contained there. He seems different tonight...he seems...ancient and almost overwhelming. His eyes blink at her, and suddenly she realizes that she's looking into the eyes of Stag.
Her own eyes wide, she stares into Stag's eyes and listens carefully as he tells her that he is far older than the Garou...that he is an aspect of the cycle of life...and that he was the one who taught Onera's ancestors their forest-wisdom.
Stag motions to the fire, and Onera looks at it. Suddenly everything around her changes again. It's still night-time, but instead of a small campfire in front of her it is a bonfire. Stag is gone, and all around her are her people, singing and chanting and dancing around the fire. She's wearing a dress of fine white doe-skin and her hair is hanging long down her back. It is the fertility-celebration from only a month ago-- the first that Onera had been allowed to attend.
Sparks shoot up from the bonfire, and the young men around her whoop with a sound that sends chills down her spine. Suddenly she becomes aware that she is the only female there, and all around her are young kinfolk men circling her and smiling-- their chests, arms, and legs bare and painted. Their smiles are not menacing in any way, but rather appreciating and respectful and completely male.
Onera finds herself feeling flushed and vulnerable, but not scared. For the first time she feels completely female-- the tomboy left behind-- and she's overwhelmed with an attraction for these males that leaves her a little confused and breathless.
Suddenly she bolts away from the fire and into the woods, and she is a white doe, ripe and fertile. The young men are young stags chasing after her, and she knows that the young men are all Stag, and that she and they are engaging in the ancient dance that Grandfather Sky and Grandmother Earth have danced for eons that brings life to the land.
And then she opens her eyes and she is kneeling in the river with the cool waters running over and around her. She looks up and down both shores, but she is alone. She feels a sense of disappointment when she doesn't see Stag. And then the lesson from the vision clicks into her head.
Stag is in every male in her life. He is the essence of pure maleness. He is in her father as Protector. He is in her teacher as Wisdom. And he is in all her potential mates as Virility. The fact that he was not on the shore when her vision ended doesn't mean he has rejected her plea. He has shown her that he is all around her and entrenched in every aspect of her life, always. He may or may not become the totem of her pack, but he is still ever-watchful and ever-present.
And maybe...just maybe she had called to Stag because she was the tiniest bit afraid of becoming an adult and leaving her family and tribe behind when she starts her journey as a Traveler. To her, Stag does represent her father-protector and her teacher, and in her mind she had seen a way to take her father and Lakota with her through having Stag as her pack's totem.
Onera stands slowly and raises her face to the sky, lifting her arms up and stretching. She is ravenous! But she feels at peace. Whatever happens tonight...whichever totem picks her pack...this peace will stay with her for always.
