time: 3:13pm
listening to: "world turned dayglo" x-ray specs
so ya......today i have accomplished nothing......yeah me......i didnt go to greek this morning like i needed to b/c me and mir and matt were hanging out in matts room till like 4 and i had to get up at 7:30 which totally didnt happen..........and someone turned of the damn ringer on my fone again!! fuck........thats why i didnt hear it when matt called this morning to wake me up......grrrr.......and thats why i didnt hear it ring when kirk called last nite........ya.......so about kirk.......i dont know anymore....i mean i want him and i love him and everything but now he only calls b/c "i called" or "i asked him to".....back to the same ole same ole.....i dont want him to call b/c i asked him to or b/c i called i want him to call me b/c he wants to talk me dammit.....he makes it sound like im twisting his arm.....grrr....i dont know if hes ever gonna get it and i know that if he doesnt that theres no point so why should i put myself thru it again just to end up worse off than i am now?? i just want to straiten this whole thing out so i can figure out what the hell is happening in that aspect of my life....
so anyway.....matt mite be putting on a show up here.....that would be cool........we definitely need some entertainment here.....peterboro is so dead......i miss london.......theres always something remotely fun to do there........the only thing to do here is go to the bar and drink.....not that i have a problem with that but i mean it costs $$ that i really dont have.....stupid peterboro......
i think im gonna get phil to take a picture of my new piercings with his webcam and then ill link them.....ooooo......and then u can see them.....wont that just be special?? im horrible.....i pick at the crustys on the constantly.....without washing my hands....im going to die of some strange disease i catch from my hands........
see my piercings
i need a shower.....ta fer now darling
time: 12:19
listening to: "saddam a go-go" gwar
soo......i talked to kirk.....yeah.....he just keeps telling me to "quit worrying and relax" but he doesnt get that i need a strait mother fucking answer from him to do that.....i need to know if he wants to be involved....i need some kind of commitment on his part to stop worrying about it!! and he doesnt fucking get it...ahhhhh!!! i swear im gonna kill him one day.....i love him to death and all but im pretty sure that its over.....and i dont want it to be but i have to protect me and i know hes just gonna break my heart again and well i really cant take it......so ya....wooo.....were just gonna be friends......i dont want to just be friends he just doesnt get me.....
on a totally different note mir is a sycho.....shes reading this book called "the bell jar" and she had to stop reading b/c she was all upset and crying......i dont know why she always picks books that make her cry.....oh my.....thats really all i can say....and when i recommended that she read "huck finn" instead (b/c we have to read it fer english anyway) she said that it makes her cry too........and i thought i was ridiculously emotional......anyway........and now shes saying shes going to clean and do hmwk tomorrow.......and im going to bare the neo-jesus.....*sarcasm*.....oh my......
so anyway i think im about done fer tonite...i accomplished a whole lot of nothing (school wise today) well wait.....i did my greek hmwk and read like another 2 chapters of huck finn.....but i could have done so much more.........i suck.....oh well......ciao