| Chris awoke to find himself strapped down to a table, with some sort of tubes secured to him. As he looked around, confused, a large man approached him and began to dab a rag on his wounds. �Where am I?� Chris asked. The creature began speaking in a growling tone. �The pit of�� he cleared his throat. �The pit of despair.� He answered in a more normal voice. �May I ask you why you�re healing my wounds if you�re going to kill me?� �Count Austin likes his victims to be in top condition before he tortures them.� �Then it�s to be torture, how predictable.� Jericho rolled his eyes. Above the pit, Count Austin and Prince Helmsley were locked in conversation. �That fool Bob Holly and his cohorts couldn�t have screwed up more to my advantage. I mean, making Stephanie�s death look like a kidnapping was good, but finding her murdered on our wedding night will be perfect. It�ll be just what I need to spark war between Greenwich and Victoria.� �You are a genius, my Prince,� Austin assured him as he poked the knot on the tree, which revealed the secret entrance to the pit. �Oh, do you care to watch?� �Austin, you know how much I love to watch you work, but I�ve got my countries anniversary to plan, and a wife to murder. I�m booked full.� The two parted ways and Austin descended into the pit. �How are you feeling today?� he asked Jericho. �I�ve been better, yourself?� Jericho responded. �Wonderful. Now, I want to explain this machine to you. It is the most diabolical machine I�ve ever invented. You see, this machine can drain your life, slowly and painfully. Now, I�ve never tested it before so we�re only going to try it on level one.� Austin placed a final piece of the equipment in Jericho�s mouth and pushed to the lever to level one. Jericho choked as he felt something being forced into his mouth. He swallowed in an attempt to keep from choking. What ever it was it tasted awful, disgusting. He screamed as loud as he could, then it was over. As Chris gasped for breath, he managed to ask Austin �What was that?� �That was one of my wife�s special recipe cookies, ground up for easy processing. For every one you eat, it shortens your life by a year. Now, tell me exactly how that felt.� That night, the king died, and his final wish was for Stephanie and Hunter to marry. They were married and the next day, Stephanie� ************************************************************** �WHAT?� Jeff cried, sitting up and then grabbing at his injured ribs. �SHE CAN�T MARRY HUNTER!� �Will you calm down?� Lita reprimanded him. �Now, where was I?� ************************************************************** They were married and the next day, Stephanie met her people, this time as their queen. As she entered the sunlit courtyard, her people bowed, except for one woman. �SLUT! SLUT!� the woman chanted. �Why do you do this?� Stephanie asked. �Because you had true love in your hands, and you let it go.� Then, to the crowds, �Her true love lives, and she marries another. So, if you bow before her, you bow before the queen of sluts!� Stephanie awoke suddenly from her dream. The king was alive, and the wedding was not until the next week. ************************************************************** �I told you,� Jeff interrupted. �Yes, you did,� Lita rolled her eyes. ************************************************************** Prince Hunter was busy in his study when his captain of the guard, Raven, entered the room. �Yes, your highness?� �Raven, I have received news that Victorian spies may try to infiltrate my wedding. I want the guards at the gates doubled the evening of my wedding, and the thieves forest cleared.� �Yes, sir,� Raven bowed to Hunter, and then left. As he was living, Stephanie entered the room. �Hunter, you know that I am grateful to you for all you have done, but if you tell me that I must marry you in a week I will kill myself.� Hunter saw the distressed look on Stephanie�s face and knew the girl meant it. �Alright, if that is how you feel, I offer you this. Write four copies of the same letter and I will have my four fastest ships each carry a copy in all directions. Pirate ships are always close to port at this time of year. Chris will receive your letter, and if he does love you, he will return for you. However, if it does not work out, I hope you will still consider me as an alternative.� �Chris will come for me,� Stephanie assured him. �He loves me.� Crash Holly, now out of a job due to his cousin�s untimely death, had found himself a place on a brute squad, which was clearing the forest. He had been told there was a young woman giving them quite a bit of trouble, and being the giant he was, he headed off to take care of her. What he found was his cousin Molly, slumped up against a miserable hut, drunk. �Molly?� he asked. �Oh, Crash, is that you?� Over the next six days, Crash helped his poor cousin sober up, and told her of the existence of Count Austin, the bald guy who used his middle finger too much. Molly was stunned. �I have to kill him. We have to stop the wedding.� �But how?� Crash asked. �You have a plan?� �No plans were always Bob�s job.� �Bob�s dead.� �No, not Bob, we need the man who beat him. We need the man in black.� The morning of the wedding dawned gray. Stephanie was in despair, for she had not heard from her Chris yet. She met Hunter in his study, a look of defeat on her face. �I understand your disappointment, my dear, but obviously Chris did not care for you as you believed. Now, the wedding will be fabulous. Tomorrow morning, we will set sail for our honeymoon, accompanied by every ship in my armada.� �Every ship but your four fastest, you mean?� Stephanie corrected. �Yes, of course.� �You never sent my letters, did you?� Stephanie accused. �I should have known.� She turned and left angrily. Minutes later, Hunter was in the pit, hovering over Jericho. �She really does love you. And perhaps you might have been truly happy. But I guess we�ll never know now.� He grabbed the lever of the machine and turned it the whole way to fifty. �NOT TO FIFTY, YOU SOMOFABITCH!� Austin screamed. Chris convulsed, screamed, and then closed his eyes as he died. |