Chapter 4: Still On Your Side
"Oh, my gosh, you guys, I am so nervous."
Jeni, Alyssa and Rachel walked from their spot to the choir room, where the results of the choir auditions were posted. Rachel was crossing her fingers and praying silently that she would make it to Chamber Singers.
"I made it!" Jeni exclaimed. (She reached there first.)
"Oh, Jen, I'm so happy for you!" Rachel gave her a hug, and so did Alyssa.
"Wait, don't tell me if I made it." Rachel took a deep breath and then scanned the list for her name. When she found it, she traced the line to the end of the paper.
"I MADE IT!!!!!!" Rachel was now yelling and jumping around excitedly. "Oh, my God! I made it!"
"Congratulations!" Jeni said, hugging Rachel.
"Rachel, that's great, but calm down," Alyssa prompted. She looked to her name and her face fell. "Ally, what is it?" Jeni asked.
"I didn't make it," she muttered.
Rachel's spirits were a bit dampened by this news. "Oh, Ally, I'm sorry."
"No, it's okay, don't worry. I have another year, anyway."
"Are you sure?" Rachel pressed on.
"Yeah. Hey, who else made it?" Alyssa asked, changing the subject. The three girls turned back to the list to see who made it into Chamber Singers. Of course, Lacey made it, as did Carrie, and�
"Jacob made it, Rachel," Alyssa informed her. "What's up with you two anyway?"
"He made it? Cool." Rachel smiled, and then suddenly, the smile vanished. "Nothing's going on with us. We broke up."
"Why?" Jeni asked, in shock. "You two were so cute at Mid-Winter!"
"Well�" Rachel trailed off. The bell rang then, so they all headed around the corner to their classes (Alyssa and Rachel had the same first period; Jeni's was right next door), and as they did, with Jeni and Alyssa prodding Rachel, they ran into Ethan.
"Ethan! Hey! Guess what?" she asked, as he gave her a hug-and kept his arm around her. Jeni noticed this first.
"Hey, Rach. What's up?"
"I made it to Chamber Singers!"
Ethan smiled. "I knew you could do it. You have the voice of an angel. You know that, right?"
"Ethan, shut up. You know I don't."
"Oh, but you do." He pulled her closer to him and she snuggled into his shoulder. "Really, I'm proud of you."
"Thanks." Rachel noticed that Jeni and Alyssa were staring at her. "What? Oh, yeah. I guess I didn't tell you. You guys know Ethan, right?"
The two of them only nodded. Rachel continued, "Well, we got together."
"You dumped Jacob for Ethan?" Alyssa blurted out. By the look on Rachel's face, though, she wished she could have taken it back. She cleared her throat and restated, "I mean, you and Jacob at Mid-Winter-"
"Yeah, I know. But Jacob isn't mad at me. I talked to him first, you know. I just didn't dump him. I tried to make this as easy as I could, but that wasn't really simple."
"Obviously," Jeni added. "So he knows about this, right? He won't have to find out from someone else?"
"Of course, Jeni," Rachel confirmed. "He was the first one to know. And besides, we're still really close." She felt Ethan cringe at this and she said, "But don't worry. I'm not planning on hurting anyone anymore than I already have."
"Well, you'd better not," Alyssa replied. "Hey, guys, I'm going to go in now, okay? I'll talk to you both later."
"Okay," Jeni and Rachel chorused. They smiled at each other and then Jeni said, "I think I'm going to go, too, Rachel. I'll see you later."
"Kay, bye," Rachel said. Then she turned to Ethan. "Are you going to go, too?"
"Nah, I'll stick around for a little bit."
"Cool." So they stood out there, waiting for Karina, Stacey and Serena (if she could make it on time). Stacey and Serena showed up first.
"Rachel, how come you didn't� call me." Serena saw the couple standing there and said, "Oh, my God. You didn't."
"I did." Rachel nodded.
"You chose Ethan?" Stacey asked.
"Duh."
Ethan smiled. "Yup, she did."
"Oh, my God! Aaah! Rachel, this is so cute! Why didn't you tell me?" Serena gushed.
"Because he walked me home yesterday so I couldn't pass by and show you. Besides, Jacob hangs out around there and I didn't want to rub it in, you know? Hey, guess what? I made it to Chamber Singers!" Rachel blabbered.
"Really? That's great!" Stacey chimed in. "How cool!"
"Yeah, I'm proud of her," Ethan said, smiling at Rachel. Just then the three-minute bell rang and Serena said, "Hey, I better be going now."
"Okay, Rena. Later."
"'Bye!" She waved as she left. Ethan said, "I better be going now, too, okay?"
"Okay. I'll see you later?"
"Definitely." He kissed her lightly and then headed two doors down for his first period.
"Rachel, I can't believe this. Why did you pick Ethan?"
"I don't know, Stacey. I didn't really choose; it was kind of set for me."
"But you can control your own fate, you know."
"True." Rachel sighed. "Listen, I'll talk to you later. I have to get going or else I'll be late."
"Yeah, me too. I'll see you later."
"Okay." Rachel and Stacey went their separate ways.
~*~
"Rachel�"
"Oh. Hey! Sorry about that."
"You looked like you were a million miles away," Ethan noticed.
"Yeah, I was."
"What were you thinking about?"
"You," she replied, smiling.
Ethan blushed, then said, "Well, then, I see that I'm not the only one who does that."
Rachel laughed and slapped him playfully. "Ethan!"
"Sorry, sorry, bad joke."
"Yeah, I know." Rachel finished packing up her stuff and Ethan asked her, "What are you doing today?"
"Well, I'm probably going to go home, eat lunch, do some homework, watch Days and Passions, and yeah. Why?"
"Do you really have to go home right now? Will you get in trouble if you don't?"
Rachel pondered for a second. She realized she hadn't even told her parents that it was a half-day� so she could hang around until three something.
"No." She grinned. "My parents think it's a regular day today."
Ethan smiled. "Good. Because I have something for you."
"Really?" she asked. "What is it?"
"It's a surprise." He kissed her and then covered her eyes. "Now don't peek, okay?"
"Ethan, I'm going to fall, I can't see."
"Rachel. Do you trust me?"
"Of course."
"Then trust me when I say I'd never let you fall."
"Okay."
Ethan led her to a not so crowded part of the campus, a quiet spot with lots of trees and grass. On the grass was a blanket, with a basket. "We're here, Rach. Open your eyes." He removed his hands from over her eyes and she gasped. "Ethan, oh, my gosh, this is so sweet of you!" she exclaimed.
"Happy Valentine's Day, Rachel," he simply replied. She threw her arms around him and gave him a huge hug, and then Ethan led her to the blanket and started pulling out plates, napkins, spoons and forks, and a Tupperware full of�
"Spaghetti?" Rachel asked, peering into it.
"Yeah, I figured I'd stick with something simple. I also know how picky you can be. Is spaghetti okay?"
"Sure. I love it. Oh, Ethan, this is so incredible. Thank you."
"My pleasure, Rachel." He kissed her hand and then said, "Well, are we going to eat or what?"
"Oh. Yeah. Of course."
After they had finished eating, they lay back and watched the clouds. "I think that one looks like an elephant, don't you think?" Rachel asked, pointing to a cloud.
When Ethan didn't reply, she looked back at him. "Ethan?"
"Hmm?"
"Didn't you hear what I said?"
"Not really� because I was too busy looking at you."
Rachel blushed and smiled shyly. "Really."
"Yeah. Oh. I have two more things for you." He fished into the basket and found what he was looking for. "I wanted to give this to you, to show you how much I really care about you." Ethan presented Rachel with a small black box. "Open it," he urged.
Rachel took it from him and opened it to reveal a small gold ring, with a sapphire heart perched on it. "Ethan, this is beautiful," she whispered, putting a hand to her mouth.
"Not as beautiful as you are." He smiled. "So you like it?"
"I love it! Thank you! But� I didn't get you anything."
"That's okay. Really. The only thing I need is you."
Rachel smiled and kissed Ethan. After a few minutes (hehe), Ethan pulled away and said, "There's still something else I have to do." He went to the nearby tree and pulled something out. Rachel saw that it was a guitar. He headed back and said, "Rach, do you remember when we were on the phone a long time ago, and I said there was a song I wanted to sing to someone?"
Rachel nodded.
"Well, that someone was you. I never actually got the chance to tell you, but you were the one I was thinking of. So. Here I go. Promise not to laugh, okay?"
"Ethan, I could never laugh at you."
"Okay. I hope you like this." Ethan started strumming the first few chords of a familiar song and Rachel listened intently.
If I were a painter, mixing my colors,
how could I ever find the blue of your eyes?
The canvas could never capture the light of your smile
And girl, if I were a sculptor, working in marble,
I couldn't hope to copy your perfect face
The curve of your body, the feel of your skin
my hands could never, ever trace
So I'll try and find a melody as beautiful as you,
find the words to say your eyes are bluer than blue
Feel my voice with all the emotion I'm feeling for you
And now, when the beat is so strong,
I'll give my heart in a song
Rachel was overcome with emotion. She couldn't believe that Ethan was doing this. She couldn't believe that anyone could do this for her. Before she knew it, the tears were misting up her eyes, but they were tears of joy.
Oh girl�
If I were an actor, I could be someone,
someone who'd always know the right things to say
But as soon as I'd see you, I'd forget all my lines
and you'd never know what I feel inside
So I'll try and find a melody as beautiful as you,
find the words to say your eyes are bluer than blue
Feel my voice with the emotion I'm feeling for you
And now, when the beat is so strong,
I'll give my heart in a song
Rachel realized she was still clutching the box with the ring, so she slipped the ring on her pinky as Ethan continued to sing to her.
There's no other way that I know to say
baby, how much I love you
And if you'd only give me a chance�
I will try and find a melody as beautiful as you,
find the words to say your eyes are bluer than blue
Feel my voice with the emotion I'm feeling for you
And now, when the beat is so strong,
I'll give my heart in a song
(Girl, I do what I do
You know why? Your eyes are bluer than blue)
I'll give my heart in a song�
You know I'm not a painter, actor, baby, it don't matter
Oh, you're so beautiful
I'll give you my heart in a song
"Ethan�" was all Rachel could say. The tears and her emotion were choking her up. "Ethan� do you really feel this way about me?"
"Yes, Rachel. You're my angel. I think� I think I love you."
"Are you sure?"
Ethan looked her squarely in the eye. "Positive."
Rachel smiled. "I think I love you too."
"Good. Because that's the way it's supposed to be."
~*~
"Not for long, Ethan. Not when you see what I have in store for you." She snickered. "Ooh, Rachel is going to pay big-time for what she did to me. She'll learn never to cross me again."
~*~
"'Bye, Ethan!"
"'Bye, Rachel. Have fun, okay? Bring me back something!"
"Like what, one of my classmates?" Rachel retorted.
"Haha. Very funny. Now get going or you're going to be late!"
"Okay, okay." But before she left, she gave Ethan one more kiss. "Love you," she whispered into his ear. He replied by giving her another kiss.
"Rachel! Hurry up!" her brother, Nathan, yelled from the car. "We're going to be late!"
"Okay!" she yelled back. Then she turned back to Ethan. "Try not to miss me too much. Oh yeah. Remember not to flirt with anyone at the party, okay?"
"I'll try." He winked. "'Bye, Rach. Have fun."
"'Bye," she waved, as she walked towards the car and sat in the driver's seat. Rachel's mother was in the passenger seat. "Ready?"
"I am so scared, Mom. I've never driven on the freeway before."
"It'll be okay. Don't worry."
~*~
Rachel shakily stepped out of the car. Driving was still new to her and she was nervous enough as she approached the church. The sight of it brought back so many memories� so many school pictures had been taken here�
"Oh, my God! Rachel? Is that you?"
She spun around and found Mikaila, Brooke, and Justin. "Hey!!!! Oh, my God! It's been forever since I've seen you! How are you?" She gave them all hugs as they started to catch up. "Rachel, you look great! And you are so tall!" Brooke exclaimed.
Justin nodded. "You're almost as tall as I am."
She smiled. "Hey, Justin. How's it going?"
"Great. Man. I can't believe it's really you here. I think we're going to be seeing more of stuff like this soon." He continued, "So, what's been going on with you lately? Have a boyfriend yet?"
"Yeah, actually," Rachel replied, noticing Justin's hand interlaced with Brooke's. "I see you have a girlfriend too."
Justin smiled. "Yeah."
Rachel smiled again. "Anyway, he gave me this." She showed them her pinky ring with the heart on it.
"This is so pretty!" Brooke squealed. "How sweet! What's his name?"
"Ethan."
"How long have you guys been going out?"
"Oh� probably about a month, something like that."
"Do you have a picture?"
"Actually, yeah, I do." Rachel dug into her purse to find her wallet. Before she could get to the picture of Ethan and herself, Mikaila pulled out another picture. "Is this him? Ooh, is this at your winter formal?"
"Yeah, that's from Mid-Winter, but that's not Ethan. That's Jacob."
Mikaila raised an eyebrow. "Really."
Rachel sighed. "Yeah. It's been a rough month."
They knew then to drop the subject. Rachel said, "Hey, do you guys know where Kaitlyn and Lukas are? I want to talk to them."
"Kait should be around here somewhere, but I don't know if Luke is even coming, Rach," Brooke told her.
"Well, I'll find them. Thanks, guys. I'll talk to you later?" There was a "catching-up" party that was going on after Mass, with different classes in different rooms.
"Okay. It was nice seeing you, Rachel." Mikaila smiled.
"Oh yeah, Rachel, watch out for Alex."
Rachel stopped, wincing at the sound of her ex-boyfriend's name. "Thanks, Justin." She wandered around, trying to find someone she knew. All of a sudden, she heard two voices, and immediately knew who they were. She decided to approach them.
"�so yeah, I don't know if she's going to be here or not," she heard the girl say.
"I hope she is. I haven't seen Rachel in forever," the guy replied. Rachel smiled and knew that she was right. "Hey, guys," she greeted them, standing in their path.
The girl smiled. "Hey, Shelle!"
"Hey, Gel!" Rachel gave her best friend, Angelika, a hug. "Why aren't you staying at my house?" she asked.
"Because I drove here." Rachel beamed. "Yeah, that's right, I got my permit."
"Cool!" she exclaimed. "So this means you can drive me around?"
"Not exactly�" Her gaze shifted to the guy and she broke out into a smile. He took that as a good thing. "Hey, Rachel."
"Alex. Hey. How's it going?"
"Pretty good. What about you?"
"Oh, I'm great. Gel! Did I tell you about Ethan?"
Angelika rolled her eyes. "Yes, Shelle, you always tell me about Ethan."
Rachel smiled. "Oh yeah, huh?"
"Who's Ethan?" Alex asked.
"My boyfriend."
"Oh." There was an awkward silence. "So, what does he look like?" Alex finally asked.
"Well, I have a picture right here." Rachel opened her wallet (which she was still clutching) and the Mid-Winter picture fell out again. Alex got it before Rachel could. "Oh, is this him?" Alex surveyed the picture. He wasn't too bad looking.
"No, actually, that's Jacob."
"Hey, I never got one of those!" Angelika exclaimed. "Let me see!" She took it out of Alex's hand and looked over it. "Oh, you guys are too cute! Why did you choose Ethan over Jacob?"
Rachel shot Angelika a look, like, "Not here." Angelika sent a look back, her eyes asking, "Why not?" Rachel looked at Alex and then Angelika said, "Ohhh!"
"What?" Alex asked.
"Nothing. It's nothing. Here's the picture of Ethan." Rachel showed her ex-boyfriend the picture of her current boyfriend (not a good idea if you ask me).
Alex looked over this picture. He wasn't too bad looking either. He sighed before he could catch himself and Rachel picked up on this. "Alex, this doesn't make you� uncomfortable or anything, right?"
"No. No, it's just that� I don't know� you've grown up so much."
Rachel laughed. "Me? Grown-up? Right."
"No. Really. I mean, you're one of the youngest sophomores I know, and yet you're already driving, you have two guys that both want you, you've got a perfect GPA� you're so� I don't know�"
"Mature?" Angelika suggested.
"Something like that. You don't act your age, Rachel. When I met you three years ago you were still in a child-like phase."
"Hey! Watch it!"
Alex laughed. "Really. But now� it's like you're an adult. So� responsible. I just thought about that when I saw this picture of you and� what's-his-face."
"Ethan."
"Yeah. Ethan."
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