Prince “Hello, I’m Charming. I hear you have somebody that needs to be awakened.”
Dopey ignored him as he was now hallucinating an extremely pornographic version of the Magic Roundabout. However Happy and Doc were hiding around the corner with Snow White behind them on the floor. Happy came out of hiding.
Happy “Are you really a prince?”
Prince “Yeah, a magic mirror told me that you were in need of help so I came straight over.
Happy “Good, our house mate Snow White has been given a sleeping potion that will kill her if she is not awakened by a kiss from a prince. Do you mind giving her a snog and saving her life.
Prince “A kiss, that is so old fashioned; we don’t break that kind of spell like that anymore. No the only way to save your friend is to be fisted by a prince, that’s guaranteed to wake her up; hell it’s never failed for me before.
Happy “O.k. she’s on the floor over there with Doc, go and fist her and see if it works.
The prince went over to Snow White, removed her knickers and fisted away for about ten minutes. Suddenly Snow White began to groan with pleasure and whisper somebody’s name, it was too quiet to hear but it was a very short name only about three letters and it began with an ‘L’. Charming fisted harder and Snow White woke up with a violent orgasm which cracked the bones in the prince’s wrist. Charming screamed with pain as she screamed with pleasure and the Dwarfs cheered with relief. The prince removed his hand carefully and helped her to replace her knickers.
S.W. “Thank you, but what happened?”
Happy “Davina spiked your coke and put you to sleep, you would have died if it wasn’t for Prince Charming here. She’s killed all of the other Dwarfs as well, there’s only us three and you left”
S.W “Prince? So you must be quite wealthy then.”
Prince “Yeah, I guess so.”
S.W. “Right, I’m sick of that bitch out there, instead of us waiting to get picked off I think that we should kill her and win the money by default.
Doc “But how, she’s a witch?”
Prince “There is a way to kill a witch, but first of all you have to vanquish her powers to make her mortal. I’ll tell you what to do and then I’ll go out and distract her, that’ll give you the opportunity.”
The prince went back outside and searched for Davina, she was still applying her make-up ready for a broadcast. She had no idea who he was and wasn’t really interested until he told her that he was a prince and had come to save Snow White. He told her that if she wanted he would go in and pretend to save her but kill the dwarfs instead. Davina liked the thought of it, but the show was getting too far ahead of itself and her bosses were wanting it to go a bit further before anybody else got killed. As she explained this to the prince, Snow White, Doc and Happy came out of the house and approached her from the blind side. Snow White was carrying a large bucket, whilst the Dwarfs were concealing something behind their backs. When they were only a matter of feet away, Snow White shouted at Davina.
S.W. “Thanks for the sleep bitch, now it’s your fucking turn.”
Davina was startled and turned to see what was happening as the prince moved away very quickly. Snow White threw the contents of the bucket over Davina, it was about two letters of fresh piss which instantly neutralised her powers. The Dwarfs then whipped out a number of giant fish which they used to beat her senseless with. As soon as she was unconscious Snow White whistled and they all ran, as Dopey came in from the trees riding the leader of a giant heard of sheep which stampeded over Davina treading her into the ground and killing her.
Snow White, the Dwarfs and Prince Charming all cheered as the dust cleared and they could see the trampled remains of their defeated foe. Just then the voice of Big Brother boomed out of the house.
B.B. “As Davina is dead, you have all won the game and will share the prize money of �70.000. Congratulations, you may come to the diary room and collect your cheques whilst our forensic teams dispose of all the evidence.”
Snow White and the surviving Dwarfs went and collected their money before all going out for a massive piss up at Stringfellows, where they were greeted by the mirror. They were praised by the public and treated like celebrities for killing Davina whom everyone hated.
THE END
Epilogue
Snow White went on to have two lots of triplets with the prince, four boys and two girls. However shortly after the final litter, Snow White discovered that the prince had been cheating on her with a girl from Leeds called Sleeping Beauty. Sleeping Beauty had also had children with him and was as surprised as anyone when Snow White came and told her. The two of them conspired to get there own back and came up with a cunning plan. That very night when Snow White and the prince were in bed, she waited until he had pleasured her with a little ‘mouth-2mouth’ and then ducked down under the covers to return the favour. She then ducked out and Animal from the Muppets ducked in and orally castrated the minaturely endowed prince, who subsequently died of rabies. Snow White and her kids then moved in with Sleeping Beauty as her lesbian lover, they are currently both expecting their first children together after generous sperm donations from the surviving Dwarfs and Pluto.
The vibrations of Snow Whites orgy with the Dwarfs caused a number of woodland creatures to become aroused, this led to an upward surge in the amount of hedgehogs being born. The extra hedgehogs made walking very difficult for wandering giants who had to walk bare foot and could not see them, the giants became very irritable because of the amount of hedgehogs that subsequently became lodged in there feet. Giants thus became very prone to start hopping and the hopping caused unprecedented damage to the fairytale community. As a result the A Team was called in by the Fairytale President Mr J Archer and B.A. violently killed all of the giants with the aid of a sling shot and some pocket sized atomic bombs.
The remains of Bin Laden and his sheep went on to grow into a giant underground weed, which choked the American and Canadian farming industry before growing into a giant beanstalk beneath the White House, sending the building and its contents up beyond the clouds. President Bush ran crying like a little bitch and was eaten by the giant after first been beaten and shat upon by the giants’ pet elephant Dumbo.
The surviving Dwarfs used the money made from sales of their orgy with Snow White to form a heavy metal band in America, using there music to subliminally control young people into doing there bidding. I am unable to release the bands name because the subliminal force may cause this testosterone filled lager fuelled sex god to lose his hypnotic like ability to make all straight girls fall in love with him. However I can disclose the fact that they wear masks and you never see there faces on stage.
The magic mirror went on to have a job hanging over the bed of Britney Speers, where he recorded all of the sick and perverted sex that she demanded from groupies and posted it on the internet for subscribers only; he is now one of the ten richest people in the world.