(John holds up a bottle of pills.)
John: Nope, I'm good!
(Suddenly, John is confronted by...dun dun DUN!!!-Justine!)
Justine: John! Hello!
John: Away with thee! Thou art scarring me damaged mind!
George: He means to say, "Justine, kiss me until I can't stand straight, then drag me off to your house &"-OW!
John: I meant what I said!
Justine: Why's Ringo here? Because saw him on the other side of the park just now.
Ringo: Where? Where was I? & was your sister flirtng with him-er-me?
Justine: You should know...well she's still in Nihilia, but she gave me a note & I gave it to you, or the other you or whatever, & he told me to tell her that he'd b-oh yeah, he swore me to secrecy. But it involves special happy good feelings!
Ringo: Justine! Please?!! I dropped something back there.
Justine: Could it by any chance be your finger? Yuck...
(He stares at Justine in impatience. Paul returns with two pretzels & George grabs one & shoves it into his mouth.)
Justine: Oh, in Adventure Land. John, where's my kiss?
(The Beatles & Brian walk away too quickly for her to catch up & eventually lose her when they get to Adventure Land. They then stop & ask a few people some questions.)
Paul: Hey you! Yes, you on the cell phone! Did you see a guy who resembles my friend here just a few minutes ago?
Guy: Can you hear me now? Good.
(The Guy flashes Paul the peace sign. Annoyed, Paul flips him the bird. The Guy starts crying & the Beatles move on.)
George: Ah, fuck! Hey you! Yes, you, with the huge ears & funny red pants!
(Mickey Mouse turns around.)
George: Have you seen this man's twin before?
(Mickey Mouse gestures that he's thinking hard about this one.)
George: Well? Don't you speak at all?
(Mickey prances over to John & gives him a great big hug, pinning his arms down.)
John: Help, please...Brian! What are you doing?
Brian: Photo-op! <Click, click, click>, I'm selling these...except for one of 'em! Ths is too good!
Ringo: Hurry up guys, he's got my letter!
Paul: Wot?
George: Just go that way-c'mon John.
John: Everybody, behind that bush! I see him! Across the street.
Ringo: Okay, sneak attack! Break up & regroup behind him, then when I give the signal, jump him!
Paul: What's the signal?
Ringo: I'll tap my wrists like so.
George: What's that on your face? Yeah, right on your hairline.
Ringo: Er, nothing. George, go to the right, John, to the-ah forget it-just go!
(The Beatles are almost to the street when a suprise parade zooms in front of their path, horns blaring & idiots in costumes prancing around. The column stretches around forever & tourists flock to see, cutting the Beatles off from the clone completely. & with this clone, who we'll call "Ringo2" & is getting away at the moment...)
Ringo2: Damn, that was close. Thank goodness for those random parades. Hmm, what's this note say?
(Ringo2 finds a quiet shop in which to read the note aloud.)
Ringo2: "Dear Ringo, I've decided to leave Nihilia secretly on dragon back. Granlith, Zoraa's telepathic elder dragon brother, can't find her, so he's leaving with me. I'm not going home; I'm going to stay with Granlith. You understand. You met your alter-ego before & I know you'd look for him if something went wrong, dot, dot, dot, I'll see you soon, lots of love, Siobhan, XOXO." I would? It's still nice though. Oh well, I guess I'll use it as identity proof. I'm the only one who knows where she is!
Writer: Aww, how sweet. Now go to Tom Sawyer's Island. NOW!!!
Ringo: You're talking to me?
Writer: Yeah. So GO!
Ringo: Okay...
(& now back to where we once belongadonged...adonged...)
Paul: Hey, you've been flirting with Minnie Mouse for a half an hour, & the parade's over now.
John: Then get her off of me!
Brian: Okay!
John: Not you! You other three do it!
(Minnie is finally pried off, who goes off & starts humping some other little kid.)
George: Now what guys?
Announcer: Ladies & gentlemen, our laser spectacular, Fantasmic, will begin in just five minutes.
Brian: He'll be there. Hey Ringo, you've been too quiet.
Ringo: Er, sorry. Planning how to kill him.
(Look of murderous glee crosses his usually soft face.)
Paul: Uh, Ringo? You just creeped me out there. That's odd...
Ringo: First time for everything!
John: Good ol' violence...it's always the way.
Brian: Let's go!
(They run to the loading dock, where some guy is tying up a small ferry for the night.)
Brian: Let us on please!
Guy: Uh, lemme think...NO!
Ringo: Move, we've got a clone to kill!
John: Ffekin' git! I'll kick yer ass for this!
(The Guy & John fight , while the rest untie the boat until John knocks the Guy out & he hops on, then they make their way to the island before the show really starts. With Ringo2...)
Ringo2: Hmm...I'd like to go on a water ride about now.
(Ringo makes his way over to splash mountain. Wasn't that great? Now with the other guys...)
John: Where IS he?
Paul: The trail's gone cold.
George: We're always one step behind.
Ringo: Ah, but closing in fast. See this blood? From his finger. Let's follow it...
(They follow the trail to splash mountain, where Ringo2 waits in line unknowingly.)
Paul: That's him! In line for Splash Mountain!
Ringo: Let's take a shortcut.
(The Beatles & Brian use the "my party's ahead of me" trick, but they are too late, as Ringo2 was already loaded & gone a couple logs ahead of them.)
John: SHIT! How're we 'sposed to kill 'im if we can't get to that bloody damned bastard?
Brian: Well if any of us didn't blow our money on drugs & got guns instead, we wouldn't be in a lot of these messes.