George: Hey Brian, what would happen if we fell out?
Brian: You'd probably break your neck & die.
George: Show me!
Brian: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.......<SPLASH, crack, death>...
(The log goes over the apex & falls, & the Beatles naturally forget all about Brian, who broke his neck & died as he said one might. Something large & brown lands not far off...)
Granlith(Telepathically): I must avenge my sister's death!
Siobhan: Slow down, big guy. Figure out which one did it, & try not to destroy all of Disneyland in the process, okay?
Granlith(Telepathically): If I must...& I know who did it.
Siobhan: So eat him & get on with it! & find Ringo please!
Granlith(Telepathically Yelling): RINGO! TO THE ISLAND, NOW! IT'S ABOUT YOUR BETTER-
Siobhan: Better half, not better...
(Granlith sends out a visual to make up for the mistake, & both Ringos & the Beatles get the message.)
Ringo: I hope that was just me & not the other one thinking for me!
John: Ringo, you've been thinking too hard. That scared me. At least think of a full shirt instead of a bare midriff...but it did look nice.
Paul: Oh yeah...heh heh heh...
George: Eew! Paul! Down, boy, down!
Paul: Why does Minnie Mouse now seem like an intersting prospect?
Ringo: Go ahead...not like we need you anyway...
John: Where's the clone? Didn't anyone see him?
George: Shit! Paul, stop molesting Minnie! Wait...There, over there!
Ringo: The clone! He's headed for the Fantasia ride! After him!
John: Paul, come on! No time for that!
(The Beatles dive into the bushes near the boarding lines of the Fantasia ride.)
Granlith: Do you see your pals?
Siobhan: Yes! They're over by the Fantasia ride! Go!
(The lone Ringo2 passes the others in the bushes & they follow him into his boat as it quickly drifts into the darkness of the inside of the mazelike chamber of the ride. When the boat drifts slowly into light again...)
Ringo2: Wow, a fire-breathing-AAAAH!!!! Not you!
Ringo: Yes, it is us. At long last, we have the chance to fight to the death.
Ringo2: Uh, sure...instead, how about we-ULP!
(Ringo punches Ringo2 in the stomach & he flies back into John, who gets offended & has the urge to spontaneously kick someone, who turns out to be George. He flies over the side of the boat into the water.)
George: Help! Can't <sputter> swim!
Paul: Looks like you're on your own, 'coz we can't either.
(As George drowns, Ringo continues to whoop ass by kicking Ringo2 in the groin & boxing his ears with his fists.)
John: That even hurt me, Ringo! Wait-which one's ours again?
Both Ringoes: ME!!!
John: Whichever one got kicked, I feel sorry for-AAAAHH!!!!
Ringo: Sorry, bub, but you gots ta go!
(Ringo unexpectedly lifts John over his head to throw him, but Ringo2 punches him in the back & he throws John crookedly, taking Paul with him, where they land on solid ground under a giant mechanical dragon.)
Paul: Ow, you fuck, you twisted me knee! SHAT!
John: Where are my glasses? Cripples & deformed babies!
(John runs around frantically & runs headlong into a metal pole, jolting his brains into a coma & causing him to collapse & roll into his watery grave. Something inside the giant mechanical dragon snaps & causes it to go haywire, much to the surprise of everyone.)
Paul: Damn knee...Oh SHAAAATTT!!! AAA-
(The robotic dragon's head swoops down & it's jaws clamp shut over his body, then the head goes back up, with only Paul's legs & arms dangling out.)
Ringo: That has to hurt...Hey, where'd he go?
Granlith: So I don't have to avenge my sister myself. But I want to, so I'll just destroy another one.
Siobhan: Watch it! Don't hit anyone with your damned poison tail!
Granlith: Good idea. Where have the short ones gone to?
Ringo2: You bastard! DIE! Wait, is that-SIOBHAN!!!
Ringo: No, she's mine! RRR!!
(The Ringoes realize their imminent doom as they struggle toward a massive fire in a sconce a ways up one of the walls & see the blood-wrathed dragon upon them.)
Granlith: MUST KILL SHORT ONES-<ROOOAAAAARRR!!!!>
Siobhan: No, you don't know which-
(Granlith soars down & grabs bothe Ringoes, one in each claw, & he throws Ringo into the flames, where he burns to a death flavored Ringo nugget. Granlith finally gets the message & drops Ringo2 into the water, where he lands on George's & John's corpses. Siobhan lands & helps him out of the water.)
Ringo2: I'm-
Siobhan: I know you're the original Ringo. The real one would never touch John. What happened to you guys? I missed you.
(Ringo catches his breath & embraces her, then continues as Granlith lands beside them.)
Ringo (Very Quickly): See, we went home, & got sued, then we were broke, so we had a concert, & Paul cryogenically froze me, then this mad scientist bought me, & then we went back because he's filthy fucking rich, then I got cloned, & then I died, & I saw you as an angel, then I was alive, & then we fought, & we got mixed up, & then Paul found Zoraa, & then I ran away to trick the clone, then they followed me here, & then we fought, & then you came, & <pause> -George is dead.
Siobhan: Well aware & I feel sorry for Sarah. Anything else?
(Granlith makes a sorry attempt at turning his 26-foot self around.)
Granlith: Uh, Siobhan? Oops...
(He only turns around partially, knocking the two over with his tail & slashing Ringo with his poison barbs.)
Granlith: <Gasp>... I'm sorry...
Ringo: 'Sallright. Been dead before. <Sigh>...
Siobhan: But it's not all right! What are you gonna do?! How can you fix it this time? YOU KILLED HIM!!!
Granlith: Wull, I could put you two together & meet you later...
Siobhan: How 'bout I take a leaf from your book & seek revenge? & he's not even aware the Cheaze Ruler exists!!! What is he going to do when he faces the Council of Doom?!!!
Ringo: Well I'm not gone yet. Actually, I feel fine. Whoops, song title. John will have my-oh yea, that whole death thing that seems to have killed all my friends...wait...ah there it is. Now I can feel the poison in my veins. I guess this is goodbye, my dear Siobhan...
(Ringo slumps against Granlith, sliding to the floor, closing his eyes.)
Siobhan: No...
FIN.
