Bumper Stickers 5

For every proverb that so confidently asserts its little bit of wisdom,
there is usually an equal and opposite proverb that contradicts it.

I keep trying to lose weight but it always finds me.

Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

Every time I think I've hit the bottom, someone lends me a
shovel.

I tried to wrestle my inner demons once... but they used too
many illegal holds. - Amanda McAllister

Into every life a little rain must fall, but I think someone has
mistaken me for Noah. - Allison Raul

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

Ideas are great provided they don't degenerate into work

I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.

Consciousness - that annoying time between naps.

There are three kinds of people: those who can count &
those who can't.

Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.

I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

There can't be a crisis today, my schedule is already full.

Did you ever stop to think . . . and forget to start again?

A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of
thinking.

I don't have a solution, but I admire the problem.

If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!

Diplomacy is the art of letting someone have your way.

Love letters, business contracts and money always arrive three
weeks late, whereas junk mail arrives the day it was sent.

Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

Dawn is nature's way of telling you to go to bed.

Don't make me use uppercase...

Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so
popular?

Diplomacy is the art of saying nice doggie!... Till you can
find a rock.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

Gravity is a downer.

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception
problem.

I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!

I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with
subatomic particles.

If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.