Bumper Stickers 46

Your parents know where all of your buttons are because they installed them.

Tell your little voices to SHUT UP! I can't hear mine...

My mind was never what it used to be.

The trouble with jogging is that, by the time you realize you're
not in shape for it, it's too far to walk back.

Life is like mail... Sometimes you just don't get it.

Property of Area 51.

The speed of time is one second per second.

I've taken a vow of poverty. To annoy me, send money.

Remember: Silly is a state of mind, stupid is a way of life.

Death. How nice. I'm looking forward to the peace and quiet.

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

Murphy's Law only fails when you try to demonstrate it.

"After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat."
-Anon

Relax. Only dread one day at a time.

Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art.

Common sense isn't.

'Politically correct' is ultimately neither.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.

Half of the world's misery comes from ignorance. The other half comes from intelligence.

Do it tomorrow....you've made enough mistakes today.

Love may not make the world go 'round, but it certainly
makes a lot of people dizzy.

"Mr. Right's coming, but he's in Africa, and he's walking."

Life is cheap. It's the accessories that kill you.

They say practice makes perfect. Well try telling that to someone who
keeps failing!

Pins get lost easily because they are pointed one way and headed the other.

The trouble with learning from experience is that the test comes
first and the lesson afterwards.

They may crush your cookie but you always have your fortune.

I do have my pride. I just can't remember where I put it.