The first historical hottie that wasn't a citizen of Britain! *Gasp* Yes, our next sultry dead guy was from the beautiful country of France. Ahhhh, France, le pays de l'amore! They say that Frenchmen are excellent lovers you know. And since he's French, I guess that would make him a "l'histoire mignon"...which actually translates into cute history, but my French sucks, haven't taken it in a year, so just go with it, yeah? (actually according to the babel fish translator he would be a "hottie historique") So on we got to the thrilling life story of Monsieur Marquis!
Marie Joseph Paul Yves Roche Gilbert du Motier (say that ten times fast) was born in castle Chavagnac (ooohhh, a castle, how romantic!) on September 6, 1757. But alas, it seems that when all of the hotties are born into the world, the powers that be look down and say "no! They are too sultry and hot! They must suffer! Bwahahahahaha!" So, because of this, his father was killed before his second birthday, then when he was twelve his mother died, followed a few weeks later by his grandfather. Man! Karma strikes big time! So, he was left an orphan *sniffle*, but a wealthy one, so we have no Oliver moments coming. No one will randomly break into song here, I assure you. Although that might be really entertaining...
Anyhow, his teens are where MJ's (no, not Mary Jane, but Marie Joseph...there is no way I am typing out that name every time) life gets really interesting. Aren't you just quivering with anticipation? I bet you are! At the tender age of fourteen, on April 9, 1771, MJ entered the Royal Army. Fourteen years old! What were you doing at fourteen years old, eh? Probably suffering through freshman orientation, not joining the army! And then, only two years later, and with basic math you will find that he was sixteen, he married Marie Adrienne Francoise de Noailles, of the Very Long Names Auxiliary Guild, and also a member of one of the wealthiest families in France. So sixteen and rich, not a bad combination. Just had to make sure he didn't blow all of his cash on C.D's and weed.
Anyhow, on August 8, 1775, MJ attended a very important dinner, attended by the Duke of Gloucester, who of the war with the American colonies with great sympathy. Being the awesome, passionate Frenchman that he was, MJ decided that he would go to America and help out! Help clear the path for a fledgling nation to be born! Vive la liberte! Keep in mind he was only eighteen when he made this decision. Sheesh, this guy lived out what some people do over twenty years in about five. I call that jumping on the bandwagon.
So, with his romantic views swimming in his head, MJ and some other officers he'd managed to cajole into the trip, landed near Charleston, South Carolina, June 13, 1777, and was welcomed by the Congress in Philadelphia, as a volunteer, i.e., he would receive no pay. What a guy! As a member of French nobility, he was commissioned as a Major General on July 31st. And then later on in the summer, a historic event occurred (Isn't this all historic you ask? Shhh! I reply. Keep reading!). MJ met General George Washington, forming a close friendship that would last the rest of their lives. MJ would serve under him as a member of his staff during the Battle of the Brandywine, would go and spend the yucky winter at Valley Forge with him in 1777, and later, gave Washington the key to the Bastille. Which I have seen! At Mount Vernon. It is so cool! Everyone should go and bow before it, er, I mean, see it. Yeah, cause there was no genuflecting going on here...nope. Actually, on a serious note (gasp!), the key is the only thing in Mount Vernon that they know to be in the original place that George Washington hung it. It hasn't moved since he hammered it into the wall, and I think that is pretty neat. You can see the key here.
OK, basically the next part of MJ's life follows the course of the American Revolution, one of my favorite wars. Wow, that sounds a little weird. But as there are many details and subtle nuances that could potentially be discussed at great length here, I am going to gloss over it and just sum it up for you all so that I don't loose any of you. Iif you are dying to know more about the American Revolution, as everyone should be, you can go here or e-mail me and I an give you a plethora of links. If you are interested in Lafayette's particular involvement, refer to the bottom of the page for more exciting links. I realize now that most of you could care less about all this, if, indeed, there are any of you out there,*scans the horizons of the net, hopefully* but hey, I can dream right?
So a brief summary of MJ's involvement in the good old U.S. Rev. MJ was going to be put at the head of a contingent to invade Canada, (poor Canada...seriously, what did they ever do?) but it fell through, so MJ went back to Valley Forge and sharpened up his military skills. He commanded some troops when Washington marched out of Valley Forge to meet the Brits in New Jersy. And then he did some other stuff...yeah, it is all really detailed so I'll let you peruse it on your own time. Anyhow, the important thing to know is that in 1778, MJ went home to France. He was prolly homesick. Awwww! He was sooooo young!
Even though he had returned to France, MJ was still a strong supporter of the US's cause. He hit up his government for money, and he could drive a hard bargain, because not only did they send money and supplies, but troops! A good thing to have when fighting a war, non? Off they went to Hamburger-a-go-go land, in the words of Louisa Rennison, to help us out. Now then, the next person who criticizes the French for being spineless or brings up the fact that we saved them in World War II, (oh no! Having to help another nation in need! Let's hold it against them for the next BILLION years!) is going to, well, get a severe talking to and made to read their damn history books, because if you all studied boys and girls, you would see that we would not have been a nation if it wasn't for the French. OK...placing soap box aside, and moving on.
French troops were placed under the Count de Rochambeau, (hah! scissors beats paper! BOO YEAH!), and MJ took command of the American division of French troops...or something...this part is kind of unclear. In 1781, for the final push, MJ was sent to Virginia with Colonel Von Steuben, who had the coolest name in history, and in the early fall, the British General Charles Cornwallis was driven into Yorktown, Virginia where he was forced to surrender, as he was blocked off on both sides, by the American and French forces on one side, and a French fleet blocking escape by sea. Phew! What a victory! And out boy MJ was there to see it all!
On his return back to France, he got involved in politics, right before the breakout of the French Revolutions! How many revolutions can one man take? He was elected as a member of the Assembly of Notables in 1787, and then the Estates-General in 1789, and I am sure you are all very intrigued by this. I am trying to make it interesting really. The Jacobins, who came to power at this time, did not trust MJ because of his moderate views, because they were, shall we say, a bit nutso. On June 16, 1792, MJ wrote a letter to the National Assembly, those crazy cats responsible for the Declaration of the Rights of Man and Citizen, denouncing Jacobin policies. MJ might have wanted to think this over a bit, you know, dissing the radical government, but you have to hand it to him, he had balls. Basically, this all lead to a string of events that had his stripped of his title as National Guard and imprisoned in Austria. Poor guy! He was just being awesome. He was set free on the autumn of 1795, but then they captured him again! Those bastards!
So to wrap things up, as this is getting a little long winded, he was finally set free in 1797 (tough break!), and eventually returned to France. Napoleon, that famous angry little man, offered him a senatorship, which he refused, and he also refused Thomas Jefferson's offer to be governor of Louisiana. To be even more vague, he served in the government more, and was the commander in chief of the National Guard during the Revolution of 1830. He died in 1834, at the age of 77. Wow! He was old!
The Marquis de Lafayette was truly a hero, and is considered so in two countries. Not a bad feat, eh? He was involved in three, count them, three revolutions, two of which shaped the course of history. he was generally awesome and cool, and gets the special distinction of being the first Historical Hottie to not dies in some horrible way at a young age. He gets a special prize for that. And so, Lafayette, we love you and pay our humble respects to you. Libert�! Equalit�! Fraternit�!