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Thor was feeling out of sorts... Maybe it was because he was having a bad hair day... Maybe it was the overabundance of mead drunk the night before. In any event, he was grumpy as all get out and not too swift on the upswing.
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In his rather depressed state, Thor contemplated the writing on his hammer, Mjolnir... "Whosoever holds this hammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of Thor." But WAS Thor truly worthy? On this particular morning, he thought 'NOT' as he exclaimed (using the royal "we"... for - after all - he WAS the son of Odin).
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Upon hearing this, Odin was pissed and decided to teach Thor a lesson.
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Under guise of a monstrous ogre, Odin went to Earth and stood upon New York City's World Trade Center, shouting obscenities about the Mighty Thor that would shame Loki himself... and otherwise dissed Thor. Never one to back off from a fight, Thor faced the challenge.
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"The Ogre formerly known as Odin" threatened to forcibly take Thor's hammer from him and put it where the sun don't shine. Thor responded by taunting the Ogre/Odin (falsely believing the Ogre/Odin not even capable of lifting the hammer, much less taking it from Thor).
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But Thor was unable to defeat his father who wrestled Thor's beloved Mjolnir away from Thor threatening to toss it into the river like so much sewage.
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As the hammer sailed ever downward toward the waves below, Thor smugly thought all he need do is whistle and it shall return to him. However, Odin, sensing Thor's misplaced pride, reverted to his true form and explained the laws of physics to Thor.
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Thor lost sight of Mjolnir which had fallen into the murky East River and drifted with the incoming tide. Now, if you think Thor was depressed earlier, you ain't seen nuttin' yet. Not only was Thor deprived of his beloved hammer, but he now had to rely on public transportation.
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A dejected Thor sat at home for days in a blue funk, channel surfing to pass the time, growing ever depressed because everything reminded him of the ancient relic which had been his companion for so many years... reruns of "Sledge Hammer", "Mike Hammer" and "My Mother (the Hammer)" passed before his glazed-over visage. Thor couldn't help but wonder aloud...
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Odin - who up to now had been a believer in "tough love" - was (after all) a doting parent, felt Thor's pain, and answered Thor's lament by disclosing the hammer's location.... Thor could not believe it. There, on the screen, was the wondrous Mjolnir, apparently found by and doing good work in the care of Ellen. No, not THAT Ellen, THIS Ellen!
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Thor went down to the local television studio, demanding that Ellen turn Mjolnir over to him. Ellen - knowing full well that the cameras were still rolling and knew an opportunity for entertainment when it presented itself - told Thor that he could have the hammer if he would sing a song and do a little dance.
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Since Thor had already experienced Odin's humbling ire - not wishing to make a bad situation worse - Thor complied with Ellen's request.
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Ellen was delighted... high ratings were sure to follow. She returned Mjolnir to Thor who couldn't wait to test it out.
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As a reward for reuniting Thor with his hammer, he presented Ellen with another song and dance.
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As Thor pranced around the maidens of Asgard turned to Odin and expressed their satisfaction.
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Thor, Ellen and Mjolnir danced their little jig which was broadcast throughout the Tri-State area... but, somewhere in Brooklyn, there loomed an ominous voice.
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If you liked this little saga of "Norse God meets hammer", "Norse God loses hammer" and "Norse God gets hammer"... then please feel free to express yourself on our Message Board (see above).
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