Tremor Tales page 2 |
Lip Reading Ready Moments after we settled into our movie Theater seats, my love wrapped his hand around The back of my neck. How romantic, I thought, A massage. Soon after, the rattling that had Started in our seats when we sat ceased and we Could at last hear the dialog. I attempted To turn my head to mention this to my love, But he squeezed my neck tightly and my sight Filled with fog. "Auk!" I choked. Startled, he shot His eyes to mine, saw them bulging and he Quickly let loose my neck. "Are you alright?" He asked. "Yes," I squeaked. "But the movie isn't That engrossing!" "Oh hon, I held your neck to Stop its shaking. It was making our seats Rattle." "My shaking caused that noise?! Well still, I can't have you choking me. No more movies till were lip reading ready." Winning Vibrations Got kicked off the baseball team When opposing players claimed that I Cheated when I batted the ball. "How could I?" I asked, indignant. Well, they said that I hit Each pitch twice in fast succession to boost The ball farther. "Huh?" I said. Be more Precise." I didn't wait for an answer, instead I tossed the ball straight up and as it fell I Slugged it with my bat, and to my surprise My hand and arm tremors vibrated the bat So fast one whack had the power of two. I laughed over this and walked away brewing A plan. Not long after, I had my own team which I named Winning Vibrations. All the players Have hand and arm tremors like me, but we Only play against teams of tremorers since Competing 'gainst steadies wouldn't be fair. Trippin' Whoopee! I've got a med that's gonna Steady me. All I need to work up to Is four hundred mgs. Gonna start on Them right away. One week gone and something Strange is going on. My carpet's moving like a Rippling stream, my light bulb is switching Between red and green. Must relax. Drink tea On the porch. Read a magazine. Whee! The trees across the street are playing tag! Gotta shine on them a flashing strobe light. Wait, since when do trees play tag at night? Shees, my medication's got me trippin'. I need a change in my prescription. There you go pills, into the trash pail. Ahhh, my brain's clearing of the unreal. It sure was fun trippin'. Too bad the pills Got my sanity slippin'. Saved By E T I was walking along when he jumped out At me and frightened me so he set off My E T. He stared at me past his pointing Sharp knife and demanded my money, Or he'd take my life. My shaking hands Fumbled for cash in my purse, while my No-no head tremors shook worse and worse. He paled at the sight, dropped the knife In the ditch, and ran away screaming, "Oh no she's bewitched!" |
I, Tremor Dreading that I, Tremor, will be seen in him My host struggles to still me as the highway Patrolman steps up to his car. "Sir, your driver's License please. Uh, why so nervous? I stopped you For changing lanes illegally, but step out Of the car, could be there's something more." My host's increasing stress strengthens me And I shake him harder. Wary, the officer Suggests that I'm a symptom of drug withdrawal. And my host strives to explain my presence. "Officer, I've essential tremor, A neurological disorder." "Essential tremor? My dad shakes like you. He has E T, it's rough. Okay, be on your way. No ticket this time But change lanes legally." Relieved, my host drives Off and his lessened stress weakens me. "That's one cop," he says, "I'm glad pulled me over." I? I curse that cop for shrinking my power. |
Poodle Poodled scrabbled across the kitchen tile In a mad dash to beat Master to his spilled E T pills. Master dove to the floor and slid Towards the pills, but Poodle got to them first And snapped them up in it's jaw. Master feared The pills would make Poodle sick so he reached Into Poodle's maw and frantically dug Out but two. The third? Alas, it was lost down Poodle's gullet. A few moments later, Poodle balanced on it's tail and twirled. Master, amazed at the pill's effect And thinking twirling fun, gulped three. But He experienced no twirling. Instead, he Fell asleep right there on the floor And Poodle went on twirling beside him. |
The Switch "Honey, what's wrong with the T V?" "Nothing. Works fine." "Then why is it that Every time I hit its on/off switch it turns On then off right after?" "Huh? I'll give It a try. There, it's on and staying on." "How'd you...? Never mind, turn it off. I Want to try again." "Okay it's off. Just think, Without me you couldn't watch T V." "Very Funny. I'll get it to stay on." She pressed the Switch with her finger and discovered That the tremor in it caused it to Press the switch twice. On, then off. Not to be Defeated, she got some dried peas and A straw. One pea hit through the straw Hit the switch on, a second pea hit turned It off. Pea mush now bedecks the switch As proof of her mastery over it. |
Crazy Daredevil My friend calls me a crazy daredevil Because I love doing dangerous stunts. They raise me to exhilarating levels That fill dull days with excitement. When we climbed to a cliff's peak near the sky, My arm tremors grew...tired muscle wages. As I flapped my arms to send them bye-bye, My friend yanked me back from the peak's edge. "Why'd you do that?" I asked, bewildered. "Flap all you want, you can't fly." "Fly?! I flapped to rid my arms of their tremor. But flying sounds fun. Gonna give it a try." Flapping my arms like crazy, into empty air I leaped. And plummeted to an eagle's nest. My friend roped me back and I groaned, "I swear, Next time I'll wear wings on the back of my chest." |