Tremor Tales page 3 |
Love In The Waiting Room Though I was calm, I shook like a new-born Lamb. "Sir, relax," said a nearby lovely Lady real low. "The dentist is gentle, Take's it slow." "No sweat, I'm drugged to the Gills," I said, admiring her form. "I took pills To ease the E T stress I bear. I've lost All feelings of dread." "You have E T?" She asked, surprised. "So do I. I, too, Took tranquilizers before I arrived." "A fellow shaker? Must've dropped From the sky." "I know what you mean. I've met No others." "Say, Miss...?" "Miss Sally." "Miss Sally, after our checkups how 'bout tea With me?" "Certainly. Of course caffeine free." After just two dates we've love that thrills, and We always hold hands when the dentist drills. |
Party Bandaids You should have seen me get ready For the New Years Eve party. I'm myopic and I had chin hairs to pluck. With shaky hands it's a matter of luck To pluck out hairs, and not chunks of skin. I could barely see where I was aimin', But I tweezed out those hairs allright. However, tweezer cuts were plainly in sight. I had no way to make them fade So I festooned them all with party bandaids. |
How could I have known? "You don't have M S, do you, miss?" Asks a guest in the elegant chair Next to mine. Before I can answer, Our host says yes. "No," say I. "I've essential tremors. Now let's dine." "Arrogant, is she not?" asks my neighbor. I nod and say, "I would tell that she Oft is. Had she deigned to wait for my Reply, she would not now be thought A fauz pas sensation, as you can hear In the whispers spreading from guest to guest." "How could I have known?" she haughtily Sniffs. "By getting all the facts," my Neighbor retorts, and chuckles fill The room. She left town the next morning In her caterer's truck never to return, Not even to host potluck. Cool "I'd rather lose a tire racing in the Indy 500 than read my report in front of the class," The teenager mumbled as he swaggered To the front of the room feigning 'cool'. There, his fear increased, for he had nothing On which to steady his trembling hands As he read. The papers shook so hard he Expected the kind of snigger he'd gotten In the cafeteria when he shakily Raised a can of soda to his lips. None came, Still he figured that the silence wasn't because His report about race cars flipping end Over end was so gripping, but because Of his weird shaking. When he finished, he Walked back to his desk feeling like he'd been In a wreck of his own. But when each Classmate raised a thumb in approval, He grinned with a coolness that was true. |
Tremor Terror Over the telepnone spoke the two shakers. Your head shakes? Mine too. How 'bout your Hands? Yeah? Also mine. Your legs? Also mine. My insides shake all the time. You've no tremor In your voice. Mine make me sound nervous. You want to use our tremors to scare? Oh, steady people who stare. I know that corner. Meet you at midnight. They hadn't described themselves So didn't recognize one another when they Approached the corner from opposite ends. "Boo!" they shouted, and scared eachother Into shaking so wildly they frightened All gawkers nearby into scrambling for safety. They burst out laughing over their blunder, And later they wrote a book they titled Tremor Terrors. It made them rich and they Tried sharing their fortune with the gawkers, But they all ran off when they came near. |
TTSC In a valley below snow covered peaks Lies hidden a club called TTSC. It was formed the day a stegosaurus Was found at play in the yard of a nurse. She told all her friends, those tremor cursed, And together they decided it best To hide it from paleontologists. So they bought the land in a valley Where grows all kinds of green grub. And made it the stegosaurus' private food galley. They call themselves, The Tremor Steg Club, And they live with the stegosaurous just fine, Their giant pet from a long ago time. |
Silver Glitter I struggled hard to slip the tiny Bauble's string around a branch of my Foot high Christmas tree, but my hand tremor Was so persistent it flipped the bauble To the floor. Frustrated, I flung a handful At the tree and almost bowled it over, But each bauble snagged a branch and stuck. I then scrabbled hold of the Christmas star And to stop it bouncing in my trembling hand I slapped it still with my other, And crushed into silver glitter. No star for my tree but it's still a hit, What with all that glitter shook over it. Steadyville The voices around him, eerily Devoid of vibrato, sent chills up his Trembling spine. None of the diners had Shaky hands, nor did heads shake no or yes. Sure's creepy here, he thought. Just then, A rock steady waitress, eyes filled with stress, Accosted him with a forced smile and waved Him to the exit. "Why?" he asked, but Before she could answer, he called out, "What's wrong with you people? Why aren't you shaking?" And she gingerly Clutched his sleeve and pulled him to the door. "Sir, you're in the wrong town. This is Steadyville, Shakesville is miles the road down." He jerked Loose, and a huge guy started his way. "Oops," He said, as he sidled out the door. "It's just That I've never seen nonshakers before." |
A Little Drinky Shaking? Who's shaking? Oh yeah, me. Aw who cares? Let everybody look. Had alittle drinky before we Came here to calm the worst of it. A little more would shut 'em down good, But then I wouldn't enjoy my food. This way I've a relaxin' feelin', and Can put up with those still goin'. I may drink more later if they worsen, But for now let's get to eatin'. Oh yeah, bits of gravy might your way fling, An' mashed taters..... Hey! Why're ya leavin'? Hmmp! Poor guy's got a neat streak problem. |