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| NAME: Kendra (Not Her Picture) NICKNAME: N/A HOOKED-UP: Never NOTEWORTHY: She was someone I had seen at Skateland in Northridge on occasion: petite, quite attractive, possessing the straightest, longest, nicest hair of any female I had been previously acquainted with. A frequent skater, she was also one of the regulars at the roller rink whom I had previously noticed back in 1988, but did not actually get to meet until the early '90s. TOBY had become a regular at Skateland for their 18-&-over theme night on Tuesdays; and during that time, he befriended Kendra. Eventually, I started skating there on the occasional Tuesday, soon becoming acquainted with her as well (circa 1994). While she & TOBY got along fine, she & I seemed to click in a more spark-filled manner. Pretty soon, we were chatting on the phone a lot; occasionally going out to eat, seeing movies and doing things together. I became smitten with her, but was not really ready to act on it, let alone admit to it. In the wake of my second love lost, I was still feeling the shellshock of that failed relationship; and it was keeping me from being as bold or confident as I might have otherwise been. Said feelings had not prevented me from dating Andi & Dana in 1994. And there were still naive thoughts lingering in my obtuse head, suggesting the very same love whom had left me would return someday...hopefully showing that "love conquers all"--but ultimately proving how mixed-up & foolish I was to hold onto said pipe dream. Kendra had also been in a longterm relationship with another guy; and at that particular time, it was hard to determine whether or not she & he were still exclusive. So couple this with my own emotionally frail state of the time, and it isn't hard to imagine me not knowing exactly how to respond when Kendra finally made a move. Part of me had been waiting in anticipation for something like that; the other side of me was afraid to move forward--in any direction--at that point. Sadly, in not understanding my situation, Kendra took this lukewarm reaction as rejection...and things were never the same after that, regardless of all my efforts to make amends. Looking back now, it is probably just as well. Although physically drawn to each other, Kendra & I didn't have a whole lot in common. Mutually interesting topics were hard for us to find; and what few discussions we did have at length were over subjects I cannot even remember now...leaving me to conclude we just weren't compatible. However, a friendship remained afterwards, which allowed for me to learn how she eventually met someone that was good for her. Early 1998 was the last time seeing her, for that was when she met with TOBY & I and introduced her first child. Sometime thereafter, she & her new family moved out of state to a new home & life in the mid-west. I eventually misplaced her phone number, and we gradually lost touch. Without a means of contact, I can only post here my hope that her life is good, that she is happy... And that maybe she'll read this someday. __________________________ |