Chapter 11

 

 

 

Giles studiously looked forward eyes focused on the small table where he could leave the small takeout tray that he had delicately balanced two cups of coffee and a bag containing a breakfast that he hoped tasted better than it smelled that he brought for his charges.

 

And they were his charges. William had always been his Slayer… and Buffy with her newfound Slayer status accompanied by the nightmare that had followed now needed a Watcher.

 

Especially one she could trust that wasn’t reporting her every move to Quentin. He would never understand why Seti had joined forces with Travers to use her that way.

 

Moving past the dresser he kept his gaze forward not glancing at the mirror hanging above it or the bed that it was facing.

 

He most certainly did not need to see either of his charges naked at this point of the day. And contrary to Xander’s inane ramblings of the night before he knew that it was only a matter of time before the two Slayers ended up in bed with each other again.

 

He only hoped that this time they could keep from injuring each other. Either mentally or physically.

 

Somehow he thought that was a futile dream, he sighed, Buffy and William both had very passionate natures and they only seemed to bring out the worst in each other when it came to that. He shook his head as he set the tray and the small plastic bag that contained a change of clothes for Buffy that Dawn, with a wide grin on her face, had thrust at him prior to his entering the room.

 

Turning to go the sound of his Slayers voice caused him to jump slightly.

 

“What are you doing?” he could hear the amusement lacing William’s voice even as he tried to calm his breathing.

 

“Don’t do that Will,” he muttered harshly.

 

“You’re in my room.”

 

“Right,” he rubbed at his forehead. He could swear he felt a headache coming on, that perpetual one that seemed to follow him wherever he went.

 

“What did you bring us?” he could hear Will shifting on the bed and hurriedly turned away, blinking rapidly when the lights momentarily blinded him.

 

“Giles what are you doing now?” he could hear the exasperation lining the young mans voice and imagined that if he turned to face him he be seeing that patented Summers eye roll.

 

“Waiting for you to get dressed,” he muttered quietly.

 

“Uh Giles… we are dressed.”

 

“What?” he turned slowly as if expecting to turn and see both Slayers lounging naked within the bed. Instead he saw William clad in his sweats leaning against the headboard. Buffy clad in the clothing that she had been wearing upon her hasty arrival at the Summers residence sitting cross-legged with a blanket around her shoulders.

 

“What?” she smirked at him. “You really thought we’d be shaggin’ like bunnies with the bit right in the next room?”

 

“Well… no… of course not,” he blustered as William rolled his eyes at the two.

 

“What’s in the bags?” he asked trying to draw the Watcher’s attention before he felt inclined to remove and start polishing his glasses.

 

“Bags?” Giles murmured blankly before glancing at the table. “Oh food, and Dawn got Buffy a change of clothes. She thought you might be tired of wearing the same stuff over again.”

 

“Damn right… if I’d known I was goin’ be attacked and be runnin’ for my life I would’ve pack a bag or somethin’,” Buffy muttered as she glanced down at the clothes she was currently wearing. Definitely far from what they were used to seeing the former vampire in.

 

Suddenly anxious for a shower and the change of clothes that she’d just received she tossed her blanket off her shoulders and slid from the bed, moving with her same quiet grace that she’d always moved with. Wrinkling her nose at the smell’s coming from the bag she instead grabbed the bag Giles indicated and a cup of coffee before turning in the direction of the small bathroom.

 

“I have time for a shower Watcher?”

 

“Yes, of course,” Giles murmured, his eyes stayed on William watching as his Slayer’s eyes followed Buffy’s every movement. When the door to the bathroom closed William’s eyes met his Watchers.

 

“What?”

 

“Do you really think it wise to start a relationship with her when we still don’t know exactly what’s going on yet?”

 

“Giles,” Will sighed pushing himself from the bed. Since everyone was getting up he might as well join in the fun. “I know what I’m doing.”

 

“I don’t doubt that you think you know what you’re doing but this is Buffy and….”

 

“And what?” the Slayer narrowed his eyes at his Watcher even as he sipped his cup of coffee. “You think I don’t think straight where she’s concerned?”

 

“I think that you see someone who needs help, the fact that she was a… friend and a lover at one point…”

 

“That has nothing to do with it… Yeah she’s human now, but she’s one of us…”

 

“Regardless of what you might have thought Buffy has been one of us for quite some time… granted she’s a bit… in the gray area when it comes to trust but…”

 

“I care about her Giles,” William murmured avoiding the older mans eyes. “I have for a while now. When Dru called and told me that she though Buffy had been dusted… well it’s been quite a while since I’ve felt as lost as I did then, probably not since Dru left the first time around.”

 

“And what does Dru think of all this?”

 

“She doesn’t like it… but it’s my life, I get to live it the way I want to. And if I want Buffy in it then she’s going to be in it, despite what you and Xander and the others might think.”

 

“I just want you to be sure William.”

 

“I am,” the Slayer smiled at his Watcher. “I can’t give her up again, I don’t want to give her up again.”

 

“Okay then,” Giles let out the breath that he hadn’t even been aware of holding.

 

And hoped that he was doing the right thing.

 

 

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Buffy used one of the threadbare washcloths to wipe the steam from the bathroom mirror. Staring at her reflection she drew a deep breath, securing the towel just above her breasts she let her hands fall to her side.

 

Cocking her head to one side she studied herself.

 

And tried to remind herself that she wasn’t the same person.

 

The human Elizabeth that Angelus had turned was not the human Buffy that she was now.

 

She wasn’t the mousy simpering, poet trying to gain the notice of a man that was so far above her station in life that she would have needed a stepstool just to touch his feet. A man that would never give her the time of day. She wasn’t the gullible female that had believed Cecily and allowed a woman that she considered a friend to make a fool of her in front of that man that thought her beneath him.

 

But part of her worried that her Slayer would see Elizabeth within her. See the woman that she been before she had been turned and be revolted, thus turning his back on her, sending her careening once more into the darkness.

 

“I’m not her anymore,” she whispered turning away from the damning reflection. Just because she looked like Elizabeth once more didn’t mean that she had to be Elizabeth once more.

 

Sighing she ran her fingers through her wet hair, hoping that niblet’d had the foresight to put a comb into the bag of stuff the Watcher had handed off to her. And maybe a toothbrush, deodorant.

 

God she hated being human again.

 

Dumping the contents of the bag onto the counter she stared at the colorful items presented her and gnawed on her bottom lip.

 

She’d thought that Dawn was no longer angry at her… quite possibly she’d been wrong about that.

 

 

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William sat on the corner of the bed hazarding a glance at the still closed bathroom door. The water in the shower had shut off a few minutes prior but Buffy was making no noise at the moment. Frowning at the digital clock sitting on the nightstand by the bed he pushed himself to his feet.

 

“Buffy?” he knocked on the door. “You alright in there?”

 

Silence from the other side. With a slight edge of panic he reached for the door knob, he could break the door down if need be but hopefully she just hadn’t locked it.

 

“Fine pet,” he heard her soft voice, his movements stilling.

 

“You almost done then?” he asked then beat himself upside the head. Buffy was a female, had been living as a human female for months… and if Willow and Dawn were any indication she should take about 30 minutes to an hour in the bathroom getting ready.

 

“Yeah,” he heard the heavy sigh in her voice, turning he moved to gather a change of clothes for himself as he heard the door open.

 

“I thought niblet wasn’t angry with me,” she murmured.

 

“What are you talking about?” William turned clothes clutched in his hands. “She’s not….” His eyes widened and he coughed loudly to hide the laugh that erupted from him.

 

“Then why am I suddenly havin’ flashbacks to Harris’ basement?” Buffy frowned glancing down at herself. “All that’s missin’ is me tied to the chair and Harris and demon girl tryin’ to shag without it lookin’ like they’re shaggin’ in the bed across the room.”

 

William’s eyes widened even further, the hideous Hawaiian shirt that Dawn had subjected Buffy to not being enough to draw his attention from the news that Xander had Buffy tied up in his basement.

 

He’d forgotten that Buffy had lived with Xander for those few weeks, had never even thought about the fact that Xander hadn’t trusted Buffy with… well anything.

 

“Xander had you tied to a chair wearing a Hawaiian shirt?” he asked evenly. Xander had tied her up, defenseless and chipped and he’d still tied her up… the thought that it might have been wearing a shirt similar to the one currently adorning her body only slightly mollified him.

 

Obviously the thinly veiled anger lacing his voice was noticeable to the former vampire though, especially since she looked up suddenly her expression somewhat guarded.

 

“It’s not what you’re thinkin’ luv. I tried to do laundry… not quite the domestic I thought I was I guess.”

 

“And Xander tying you to a chair? You can’t tell me that what I’m thinking isn’t what happened. You were defenseless back then Buffy.”

 

“Been a lot of things pet… defenseless was never one of them,” Buffy smiled up at him. “Besides you know Harris never trusted me… he never will trust me. Regardless of what I am now.”

 

“Well he’d better learn,” William muttered.

 

“It’s not worth it,” she said softly moving across the room to him. Cupping his face within her hands she gazed at him. He was her whole world… but she wasn’t his.

 

She knew that. She even accepted it to some degree. All she’d ever needed, ever wanted was him… but he needed his friends, his family, his Watcher to complete him.

 

She wouldn’t let something that was so far in their past that it was inconsequential come between him and one of those friends. Months ago she would have, would have let it drive him further into the dark with her. But now… Now she thought she understood why he needed those loved ones to balance him.

 

“Buffy…”

 

“It’s not worth it,” she stared at him. “I’d forgotten all ‘bout it until I put the damn shirt on.”

 

“They need to accept you. You’re part of my life now and they need to know that,” he muttered stubbornly.

 

“You’re fighting a losin’ battle there Slayer. They’re never going to accept me. Human, vampire… I’m still the one that’s tried to kill them, that tried to…” she looked away. “They won’t accept me,” she reiterated softly. “And I’m okay with that,” smiling wistfully she let her hands drop to her side, turning she disappeared back into the small bathroom, William staring after her.

 

“But I’m not,” he whispered. “I’m not.”

 

 

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