Not That Sane. V Lakshman. Every Wednesday.

Passive Acceptance (May 27, '98)

I don't feel like getting on a soapbox these days. The ironic thing is that there is plenty that I could get worked up about -- the antitrust case against Micro$oft, Indian nuclear tests and attendant sanctions ... But I am not worked up. I could care less whether there are baby Bills keeping competition alive in the industry or what the tottering government in New Delhi does to bolster its chances of survival.

My concerns these days are more personal. I worry about my career of course, planning the things I will do three years from now. All the ways my wife can get enough credits to finish school as soon as possible get worked out, as do all the justifications to not buy a house (and mow the attendant lawn). We take summer trips and go to softball games. I haven't volunteered at a Habitat for Humanity building site in months. Yes, my concerns and activities these days seem more and more inward-looking.

It is not the way I would like to live but that is perhaps what the sages meant when they divided a man's life into four parts -- childhood, studenthood, householderhood and retirement. According to Indian tradition, studenthood is associated with bachelors who are expected to learn and to try to change the world. The householder status is given to married people when they settle down and decide to lay low and not get in anybody's way. That pretty much describes me now. It is a sad turn of events.


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