cake and pie

Congratulations to Lisa Loeb and the release of her new album, "Cake and Pie!" Go check it out. In the credits, she mentions Jammer and Annie Lin. I still remember when we were a bunch of Lisa-crazed dorks, chatting on #lisaloeb and posting stuff on forums...and now we (well, THEY) are just a bunch of Lisa-crazed dorks with recognition in Lisa's albums. Congrats, Loebers!

It's been awhile since I've written in here, which is pretty much due to the fact that I no longer an employed, meaning no more fast connections...keeping up with the journal 56K style will be a little more difficult, but it can and will be done.

No major lessons to rant about today...just my thoughts on my last week here. I don't think I'll be working out at all this week, unless you count last night's visit to Mestre Acordeon's capeoira cafe, which left me sore. My thighs may still be big, but my quads definitely need some work. Working out at the Y is one thing, but putting those muscles to work like for capoeira or Muay Thai is a completely different thing. When you're doing something like that, you're testing your endurance and your strength, applying it to "real life" and it shows me how weak I have gotten.

I got some exercise Saturday night, though. K and I decided to go to Chinatown to check out the new year's parade and since the N train wasn't coming for awhile, we just walked further up the route to catch it at a later stop. We joked about walking to Chinatown...just joked...but once we reached the tunnel where the N enters, we realized maybe we could do it. So we did. We walked, walked, walked, through familiar and unfamiliar neighborhoods. It was quite an adventure and I loved it. I've always wanted to take a long walk through the city, and finally, it happened. We walked up past UCSF, through Haight, through some shady areas where I got a little nervous, and then finally onto Market Street past the not-so-safe Van Ness and Civic Center stations. At one point, this guy in a big coat walks by and I guess someone bumped into him and he dropped everything he had been holding underneath his jacket--porn magazines. Kind of amusing...

We finally reached the Powell Street station and saw some sparklers and smoke...we had just caught the end of the parade. Oh well...walking there was the event of the night anyway. Getting home was not so easy. It seemed like we were always *barely* missing the N train. It was funny though, and fun. Definitely an evening to remember.

I don't know what to make of my last week here. I'm trying to pack up, but it doesn't look like I'm making progress...although I am. I need to pack up kitchen stuff tomorrow. I feel like Q and I aren't having that much fun together...and maybe it's because we're both sick and physically uncomfortable, but it's the first time that I've actually felt a little uneasy. Like I want things to be normal but I can't help but have that little nagging voice remind me that I only have a few days left here. And of course we will visit one another and keep in touch, but there won't be the comfort of knowing that she's less than 10 minutes away. No more sharing the pleasures of everyday friendship...of running to cure a tapioca drink craving...or hanging out in Borders until it closes...of riding in the car together singing along to all the ghetto songs.

I feel like I'm withdrawing from people. I do want to spend time with people, yet once I'm with them, I don't feel like talking. It's like I want to NOT have fun because if I have fun, it will be even harder to leave. I don't know what my problem is.

Yesterday I met up with Paul and Dorothy Yaggy...Paul has been working with OCI for a long time. Finally a chance to meet face-to-face with someone from OCI. It was a real blessing to just get to know them, to hear about their lives, and also to hear about the Sao Paulo office and the workers there. I'm definitely more excited about going now, but I also know it will be a challenge. Paul said that they're aggressive and confrontational...something which I definitely am NOT. But I think God isn't just being funny...I think He knows He is doing and He knows what I need to work on. I need to be more vocal about my opinions and not worry so much about pleasing others. I also have to learn not to take things too personally if they voice their suggestions to me.

Anyway, enough random ramblings. I wanted to end with some lyrics from "Cake and Pie," but I must admit, Lisa's lyrics are not so poetic as they used to be.