Praying to die-Part 3 (Disclaimers and headers found in part one)
I awoke, grateful my resolve hadn't left, got ready, grabbed the paper bag, and headed out.
I ducked into a busy coffee shop, changed, and caught the bus to the airport. I always found riding public transport disturbingly amusing. All these people living their normal lives, ignorant about what was really going on out there.
The original men who started the project believed they were doing the world a favor by keeping the truth under wraps. At first, I agreed. When I found out the whole truth, I was sick for days. It took time to be able to think about it without throwing up. Later I began to doubt their mentality. If mankind was going down, we should at least go down fighting and not just led to slaughter like cattle. I believed that until I realized most of us are like cattle.
If the truth did come out, most people would assume those in charge would take care of things. They'd get up the next morning, go to their jobs, come home, have dinner with their families, and watch a few hours of TV before going to bed. The next morning, they'd get up, and repeat the same routine over and over again, until the knock on the door came, telling them they were being shipped to an alien enslavement camp. Even worse, when that day came, a lot of them would just obey and go, no resistance at all. That's a bitter pill to swallow. The realization that you're fighting for something that no one gives a shit about.
My business at the airport was fairly quick. I placed my Walter controller in a locker, and mailed the key to my hotel. I hesitated before I sent it. Without the controller, I had no real leverage over Skinner. I needed him in order for this to work, but I knew that something could go wrong, and I didn't want those things to get it. When I got back to my hotel, I let the hotel receptionist know I'd be clearing out by the end of the month. I gave her Skinner's address as a forwarding address. If Skinner didn't cooperate, I still had time to intercept the key.
I arrived at Skinner's office, and waited for him to come in. I was about to put my life in the hands of a man who hated me more than anyone else, even more than Mulder, and the only leverage I had for making this deal was probably being sorted at the post office. I was beginning to think I should've just opted on getting a few more hours of sleep instead. I smiled as I thought back to when I was assigned as Mulder's partner. I told him something about the disasters sleep deprivation causes. I guess I could add one more to the list.
Skinner finally came in. As soon as he saw me, I could see his body tense up.
"Where the hell have you been?" His voice even shook when he spoke to me. Had I gone crazy? I was going to trust this man?
I shrugged. "I had things to take care of."
He glared at me. "What are you doing, Krycek? Why show up and help out, when we both know you couldn't care less? We both know you're aligned with the people who are trying to get Scully and her baby. Why? Is this some kind of control trip or something?"
I glared back at him. "You know Walter, you may find this hard to believe
but I am not aligned with anyone. More like owned, and as far as control goes,
there is very little in my life that I have control over. " I smiled, and
added, "except you. I do control you."
"One of these days Krycek, I'm going to get that device of yours, and when I do, I'm going to kill you."
"Funny you should mention that, because I have one last favor to ask you, that could give you exactly what you want."
"What are you talking about?" He was still frowning, but he looked interested.
"Like I said one last favor. Do it and the controller is yours. You can use it to destroy all the bots inside your system. The whole nightmare will be over."
He took a step back and crossed his arms." What do you want?"
I swallowed, and took a deep breath. "I want you to kill me."
He sat down in his chair, staring at me. I took out the gun, and placed it on his desk.
"Within the next couple of days, I'll call you, telling you where to do it. When I do, I want you to go to the place I directed you, take this gun, and shoot me in the head. It must be this same gun, with these same bullets, and it must be the head."
He picked up the gun and asked. "What's so special about this gun?"
"I picked it up at a deep training facility a while ago. They use it for combat training. It was designed with the belief that trainees would be more on guard if they knew the bullets would actually wound. These guns, and bullets, are designed to hurt and draw blood, but they aren't fatal."
"So you don't want me to kill you Krycek, you just want me to shoot you." He paused and said, " Maybe I'll just use my gun and put a real bullet in your head."
I had already accepted that risk, but I wasn't going to let him know. "I wouldn't consider doing that, Walter. Right now I'm the one with the controller. I'm willing to give it to you in exchange for your help, but if anything happens to me, that controller is going to end up in the hands of some very mean individuals. What they'll do with it would make the pain I caused seem like paradise."
He was still not convinced." Why?"
Fuck, what did it matter why? I took another deep breath. "Because I'm tired, and I don't want to do this anymore. Because any rationale I had for my involvement in all this is gone. Because I want out, and the only way I can truly be free of them is if they are certain I am dead."
"Why the head?"
"If you shoot me anywhere else they might think I'm salvageable, and take me to get replicated. A bullet in between the eyes would look like instant death. They won't even bother with the body if they see that."
He kept staring at me, I could tell he was trying to think of more questions but I had wasted enough time, this shouldn't have been that complicated, for him at least. I was the one that had to throw all this together. I leaned over his desk.
"Look Walter, if getting control over your life isn't enough to make you accept this deal, then think about this. These things aren't like the men we used to deal with. They have little use for humans. Why hire a lackey when you can just make your own, one that will never disobey orders, never need medical attention, never get killed on the job? I've managed to keep myself useful for them up to now, but their use for me is fading. When it's gone, they will turn me into one of them, just like Billy Miles. Imagine that for a moment, an Alex Krycek walking around with even less scruples than I have now, and it would be unstoppable."
I think that one got him. He placed the gun in his desk drawer. I was about to ask if we had a deal, but there was a knock at the door and Mulder and Agent Doggett walked in. Mulder was holding a photo.
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