JAG Headquarters
January 10, 2002
09:55 EST

“Hey, Sturgis,” Harm called on his way through the bullpen. “How’s it going?”

“Hey, Harm. Not too bad actually. How did things go on the Henry?”

“Nothing I couldn’t handle,” Harm relayed confidently. Leaning over, Harm asked in a conspiratorial whisper. “So, how did things go with Mac? You guys come to an understanding?”

Sturgis immediately thought back to Mac’s moment of confession. “Oh, we came to an understanding, all right.”

At that moment, Mac breezed into the room. “Hey, Sturgis. Ready to get to work?”

“Hey, Marine. Yeah, ready whenever you are. If you think you can handle it, that is.”

“Ha! I can handle anything you can dish out, Navy, and then some. I’ll see you in a bit.” She continued on her way to her office. Almost as an after thought she turned around and added. “Oh hi, Harm. Glad to see you made it back in one piece.”

“Yeah.” That’s all he could manage, but it didn’t matter anyway, she hadn’t even waited to hear his response. Mac and Sturgis almost...flirting, for lack of a better word. ‘What the hell is going on?’ He was more than slightly bothered over what he had just witnessed.

“Well, Harm, sorry but I can’t talk now. Got to go look over this case before Mac has me for lunch. You know how that goes,” Sturgis smirked, winking at Harm. “I’ll catch you later.” And without a backward glance, Sturgis headed off in the direction of his office.

Harm stood, his feet firmly rooted in one place. Surely he was over reacting. Nothing was going on between Mac and Sturgis, right? They were starting over, tentatively moving toward them, together. She wouldn’t go for Sturgis. Yeah, he was just jumping to conclusions. He’d talk to her later and get to the bottom of this. She’d clear everything up.

Walking to his own office, in spite of his pep talk, Harm still couldn’t help but feel like he’d been replaced yet again.

The day wore on, with paper work piling up rather than getting finished. Every so often Harm would look over at Mac diligently working next door. Not for the first time, he was struck by how stunning she really was. Renee had said once that Mac was mousy and drab. There was nothing mousy or drab about Sarah Mackenzie. She was a knock out. Perfect skin, cute little nose, full lips, beautiful eyes, and a body...God what a body. ‘Whoa, hold up there, partner. Better quit before you embarrass yourself.’

As if sensing his eyes on her, Mac raised her head and looked in his direction. Not even bothering to hide the fact that he was openly staring, Harm met her gaze. His breath seemed to catch in his throat as, slowly, she smiled at him. Again Harm countered with a smile of his own, and it seemed like for that one moment in time all was right in his world. ‘Who knows, maybe I’ll get up the nerve to ask her to dinner tonight.’

Finally nodding in acknowledgment, Mac turned back to the file on her desk and the spell was broken.

JAG Headquarters
March 8, 2002

Of course he hadn’t asked her to dinner that day. He had watched her turn off the lights in her office and head out the door, pausing only long enough to say good night to him, before finding Sturgis and walking out with him. Pride had held him back from following her. If she’d rather spend time with Sturgis that was her business. He had no claim on her.

‘You could have,’ that small voice nagged him, but he had pushed it aside. He didn’t want to hear it.

That was almost two months ago. And now, things were much better between them. Even though the strange bond still seemed to be there between Mac and Sturgis, Sturgis was too preoccupied with Bobbi Latham these days. The Admiral was assigning them cases together again, and that bond that had always been between them was growing stronger once more. Still, Harm could feel her holding back, fighting ‘them’, and he could understand her reluctancy. He was scared too.

Standing on the back of that carrier a week ago, watching the wind whip through her hair and the sweet smile play about her lips, he had come to a realization. He was tired of waiting. It was time to move forward. Wanting to kiss her right there, the only thing that had stopped him was his fear that she wasn’t ready. They were just now starting to be comfortable again, talking, laughing, smiling, touching. Harm wasn’t sure he was ready to give that up just yet either. When he had come back from the mission, he was surprised at how relaxed they had been with each other. It seemed they were back on track in their friendship...until they got back home.

Sighing, Harm leaned back in his chair, rubbing the bridge of his nose. After their stint on the Sea Hawk and him almost going down, again, and then Bud’s trial, they were back to slight pleasantries. Bud’s trial had played hell on everyone’s emotions, and Harm and Mac had been caught up in the heat of the moment. Wincing from the memory of her on the stand, Harm stood and got ready to leave. It really had been awful. He had done what he had to do to help Bud, and he was sure Mac understood that, but it didn’t make him feel any better.

Picking up his briefcase and cover, Harm made his way to the door. Flipping the lights off, Harm was about to cross the empty bullpen when he noticed Mac’s light still on. The blinds were closed, but Harm decided to take a chance and talk to her.

Tapping lightly on the glass pane of her door, Harm waited until she called out for him to enter.

“Hey, Mac. Working late, huh?”

“Very observant, Commander,” she countered playfully. “What are you still doing here so late?”

“I had a few things I needed to finish before I headed out.”

Mac nodded in understanding before offering, “Want to come in and keep me company?”

That earned her one of his flyboy grins, and Mac felt her reaction to it deep in the pit of her stomach. No matter how many times she had seen it, it still left her breathless every time. He was also doing it more often these days she noticed. He was such a beautiful man.

“Mac? You okay?”

His soft voice drew her out of her reverie. “Um...yeah, sorry. I was just lost in thought there for a minute.”

Sitting down in one of the hard office chairs in front of her desk, Harm replied. “That’s all right. I’m just glad you found your way back,” he chuckled. Leaning forward, Harm rested his elbows on his knees, while he played with his cover nervously. “Mac, I’m sorry about Bud’s trial. I know you did what you had to do, I just hope you realize I was just doing what I had to do,” Harm finished, unable to look at her.

“I know that, Harm. I don’t hold that against you.”

“Then why haven’t you talked to me the last couple of days?”

Sighing, Mac tried to put into words how she felt without giving too much away. “It’s just been a rough week for everyone. I’m...I just can’t seem to get out of this funk I’ve been in. I haven’t really talked to anyone.”

“Not even Bud?”

“No, I haven’t talked to Bud or Harriet.”

“It’s all right, Mac. I’m sure he knows you were just doing...”

“Don’t say that I was just doing my duty, Harm. It doesn’t help. He’s my friend and I had to get up there and betray him.” Angrily, Mac stood, starting to pace behind her desk.

“Mac, you didn’t betray him, and you were on his side by the end. You just told the truth. You did what was right.”

“It didn’t feel right, Harm,” her small voice tore at his heart. Stopping in front of her window, she looked out into the starlit sky.

Getting up, Harm made his way over to stand behind her. “Mac, doing what’s right doesn’t always feel right. In fact, most of the time it hurts like hell.”

“You sound like you’re speaking from experience.”

“I am.” With that, Mac felt his arms wrap around her. Melting against him, Mac felt his warmth, his strength invade her body.

“Thank you, Harm.”

“For what, Mac?” he asked, laying his cheek against her soft hair.

“For the hug. Sometimes a hug makes all the difference in the world.”

“I’ll have to remember that,” he replied, smiling into her hair.

Pulling away slightly, Mac turned in his arms. Wrapping her arms around his waist, Mac squeezed. “You do that, Flyboy.”

"‘Flyboy’, huh? It’s been a long time since you’ve called me by a nickname, Ninja Girl,” Harm whispered, brushing some of the errant strands off of Mac’s face and gently tucking them behind her ear.

“I didn’t know if you still remembered that.”

“I remember everything about the time we’ve spent together, Sarah.”

Mac started at the use of her name. She could count on one hand the number of times he had used it, and when he did, it was to show her he was serious. “It seems like such a long time ago.”

“It was a long time ago, Mac, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be like that again.”

“Is that what you want? To be that close again?”

“I want to be as close to you as you’ll let me, Sarah Mackenzie.” He paused only a moment before rushing on. “Mac, would you like to grab some dinner, maybe a cup of coffee?”

“I’d love to, Harm. Just let me get my stuff together and I’ll be ready.”

Harm waited until Mac had all of her things, before walking her out of the office, turning the light off behind them.

“So, where are you taking me, Sailor?”

“Oh, I don’t know. How about Beltway Burgers?”

“Are you feeling all right? Did I just hear you say what I think you just did?”

“Well, I know it’s your favorite,” Harm countered smoothly.

“My favorite, huh? So, what is ‘Mr. Practically a Vegetarian’ going to eat?”

Deja Vu swept over him. He had totally screwed up that chance, not this time. “I don’t care as long as it’s with you.”

“Good answer this time, Rabb,” Mac quipped as the elevator doors slowly closed behind them.

Leaving the building, wrapped up in just being with each other, neither one noticed the lone car parked further down the lot or the solitary driver watching their every move. Observing them leave the deserted office building from across the parking lot, a plan was already beginning to form. Sarah Mackenzie would never make it out of this one unscathed; she would finally be his this time, or she would pay with her life.

Continue to Part 2

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