| Redemption By Enigma |
| Disclaimer: Characters and situations related to BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER and ANGEL are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the WB, and others. No copyright infringement is intended or implied. Anyway, you could tear out my fingernails with needle-nose pliers, and I still wouldn't tell you where Enigma was, so threaten all you'd like. Archive- Please email request. Feedback- Absolutely. ******************* He felt strange. Not strange like the day he woke up as a vampire or strange like the day he briefly turned human. No this was different. There was no heartbeat and no hunger. Especially no hunger for blood. The lack of that craving was most noticeable. He had spent a 100 years joyfully feeding off it and many more regretting every time he had fed. During that last period of time he had choked it down only to meet the demands of his body. Taking no joy in the act. But now it was gone. There was no desire for blood, no need. He felt free. He felt at peace. As that second sensation struck him it felt just as odd and caused a moment of panic. Peace was a feeling he never expected to feel again. Last time he had felt it Angelus had returned and wrecked havoc and almost destroyed the world. Buffy had taken the brunt of Angelus attention and the remorse he felt for that was as great as the remorse he felt for all the hideous deeds Angelus had done before. As the sensation of peace continued to linger Angel started to relax. There was no pain and no panic. He didn�t feel Angelus returning to control. As he continued to relax he realized he didn�t feel Angelus at all. That part of him that was Angelus just didn�t seem to be there anymore. This was as strange as the other feelings. For over 200 years he had shared a body and a conciseness with Angelus and now he was alone. Why was Angelus gone and what did this mean? Was he no longer a vampire? Was he human again? No, there was no heartbeat and no breathing. What now? And the feeling of peace became deeper. He still remembered all the horrible deeds he had done but now also had the memories of all the people he had helped. Buffy living a long life in the sunlight, helping Cordelia surviving those first years in LA and all those countless people who without him would have become nameless victims to unexplainable crimes. Why? Why am I at peace? And then he understood. He had been forgiven. Not because he had saved enough people. Not because he had yet again helped to avert the end of the world but because he had asked. It was that simple. He could never save enough people to make up for what he had destroyed. All he had done was ask and it was granted. He was no longer doomed to walk to earth feeling lost and alone. He still felt remorse for what Angelus had done. That would never leave. But it was no longer his controlling emotion. He now opened his eyes to look and was surprised to find himself looking down at himself. There he lay on his bed looking for the world as if he was sleeping. Slowly he pulled further away from his body and now he looked down on the brick building that had housed his office and apartments for the past years. He could see Wesley entering the building and knew that he would find his body shortly. As he drifted further away he could see Sunnydale and that brought a smile to his heart. He had found strength, hope, and love there. The strength to go on fighting, the hope that someday today would happen, and the love of Buffy. Buffy�s love had given him the strength to go on and her undying forgiveness of him and acceptance had given him his hope. He had repaid her by hurting her beyond measure but she had forgiven even that. Now she continued to live in Sunnydale. Battling the forces of darkness by night and being a professional by day. Now he could see the whole North American Content. He thought of Willow who had used her gifts with a computer to travel here and there picking up a project only when it interested her. Oz�s band was all the rage and Xander had surprised everyone. After bouncing around Sunnydale for a year doing odd jobs he started taking classes at the local community college and now was a respected professor at UC Sunnydale. Who would have thought. The year after Buffy and Willow graduated they had all taken that trip around America in a car. They all had blast. And Giles, he continued to act as a Watcher when needed. They had finally built a new high school but Giles had not taken the position of Librarian. Instead he had chosen to start a family and write. After years of studying legends and averting disaster he had a wealth of knowledge to draw on. It turned out he was a pretty good writer. And now he could see the whole world. He thought off all the evil he had done and then off all the good. Somehow the good didn�t seem to balance out the evil but it was enough. �Why?� he asked. �Why is it enough? How can I just be forgiven for all that I have done wrong?� �You asked.� �But if all I had to do was ask why didn�t it happen long before?� �You had to forgive yourself first, this is the first time you have asked. Before now you have never asked to be forgiven. You have wondered if you could be forgiven, never asked to be.� �Oh. What happens now?� �You join the others in the ever after.� Author's Note: This is a train of thought story. It rambles a bit. Main Menu ~ Return to "Other Worlds" Menu |