ACT ONE PART ONE
Disclaimer: Ken and co. aren't mine. If they were, I'd probably just make them star in more twisted musicals, so they should be thankful. Some of the songs aren't mine either; I'll list those at the end of the chapter so you'll know which ones aren't mine (here's a hint: the songs I wrote are the crappy ones.)
Author's Notes: Good God, I wrote another one. Be afraid. Be very afraid. There is no sequel to Cinderella that I know of, so this one is all my own creation, though I admit to stealing--er, borrowing lots of the songs from other sources. All warnings from the CinderKen apply here. Yaoi, yuri, swearing, innuendo, general weirdness. Couplings include Kensuke (duh), Taito, Hiyako, Jyoumi, Takori, and who knows what else by the time I'm done. Oh, and despite the opening narration, all the Digidestined will eventually appear in this fic. The title will be explained in the next part. Read, review, scratch your head in confusion, etc.
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(An empty stage. Takeru and Iori step out of the shadows, wearing their matching Fairy Godbrother outfits. A piano plays softly in the background.)
Takeru: It has been nearly a year since CinderKen and Prince Daisuke were wed, and all is well in their little kingdom of Digitanna.
Iori: King Jyou and Queen Mimi are growing weary of rule, and have decided to step down from the throne in order to pursue a lucrative career as caterers. Don’t ask me where that came from.
Takeru: Anyway, they are now preparing for a coronation, as soon as they decide exactly what title to bestow on Ken as husband of the soon-to-be King. Princess Miyako is happily married to Ken’s stepsister Hikari, while the royal advisor, Taichi, has been wed to Ken’s stepfather Yamato, who loves Taichi even more than he loves his mirror. The second stepsister, Sora, has disappeared from the kingdom without a trace.
Iori: The Digimon who Ken befriended have moved into the palace, where Chibimon has latched onto the Prince. Daisuke and Ken are living in perfect bliss, unaware that their peaceful lives shall soon be interrupted. Let’s check up on the happy couple, shall we?
(The two move to the sidelines as the curtain opens to reveal a lavish bedroom. There is a heart-shaped four poster bed in the center, and there is glitter on the mattress. Think sleazy hotel here. Ken, decked out in his Kaiser clothes and holding his whip, is chasing a half-clothed Daisuke around the bed.)
Ken: Stop playing hard to get!
Daisuke: Nyah nyah! Too slow!
Ken: Dai-chan, I insist you stop this or I’ll have to punish you severely!
Daisuke: Promises, promises. If you really loved me, you’d run faster!
(sings) Catch me, catch me, let’s see you run
Around the room, come on, let’s go,
Catch me, sweetie, let’s see you try,
Ha! Too bad, you’re still too slow!
Ken: It’s hardly fair to run, my love
Yet still I chase you ‘round the bed,
It’s really quite amusing, love,
You’d think we were never wed.
Catch you, catch you, easily
On your feet, my dear
Tsk, tsk, still so slow
You call that running? Nowhere near!
Daisuke: Ha! Catch me, catch me, if you can
Hold that whip up high!
If you really loved me, Ken-chan
You wouldn’t be asking why.
Ken: Take that! (He dives at Daisuke, pushing him onto his back on top of the bed.)
Catch you, catch you, never fear
On your back and on the bed
I’m not too heavy, am I dear?
Oh my, you look so red!
No blush, Dai-chan, don’t be shy
With you below and me above
I don’t see why you insist on playing
But it’s fine since we’re in love.
(Outside the closed bedroom door, Jyou, Mimi, Miyako and Taichi are sitting in the hall. Minomon is floating curiously in front of the door.)
Miyako: There are some things I don’t want to hear
And I’d say that this is one
After all, he is my brother
And he’s having too much fun!
Jyou: I really don’t like to think
About what they do in that room
It makes me feel a little strange
I have a sense of doom.
I feel a little queasy
A little sick, it’s true
I think I’m hyperventilating
And I bet I’m turning blue!
Mimi: It wouldn’t be so bad I suppose
If it was me in there
But if my son’s getting more than me
It’s really not very fair.
After all, I rule this land--
Jyou: You’ve forgotten something, I fear!
Mimi: Ahem. What did you say?
Jyou: (Weakly) Nothing, dear.
Taichi: Yamato has that stamina
Maybe it’s a household thing
In fact, I think I’ll go find him
Since it’s better than listening. (He exits.)
Mimi: I know that they belong together
Miyako: They fit just like a glove
Jyou: I guess you can’t hope for quiet
All three: When you have two boys in love!
(From inside the room, noises are heard.)
Daisuke: Oh! Oh, Ken-chan, not there!
(Minomon curiously eases the door open. Miyako, Mimi, and Jyou exchange disgusted glances before booking it out of there at top speed. The door swings open to reveal Ken sitting on Daisuke’s back, tickling his bare feet.)
Daisuke: Stop it! No tickling! Foul! Foul!
Ken: That’ll teach you to be coy with me.
(The curtain closes as Takeru and Iori reappear.)
Iori: Ahem. Well, that was...interesting.
Takeru: How come we never do that anymore?
Iori: Now is not the time, Takeru-kun.
Takeru: (Sighs) Ah, young love.
Iori: Yes, all was well in the palace. But elsewhere, in the dark and not very nice neighboring kingdom of Whatsisname, someone watched this happiness with great anger.
(The curtain opens again to reveal Oikawa, sitting in a dark, dungeon-like room on a black and spooky Throne of Evil. Villain music plays in the background.)
Takeru: King Oikawa hated all things happy and bright, because he was so ugly and freakish.
Oikawa: Don’t you think that’s hitting a little below the belt?
Takeru: Quiet! You’re ruining my narration. Anyway, King Oikawa watched the joy in Digitanna with anger in his eyes and promised that he would do something to stop it.
Oikawa: There is far too much happiness in Digitanna. I promise that I will do something to stop it!
Takeru: See? What’d I tell you?
(Takeru and Iori move back to the sidelines as Oikawa begins to speak.)
Oikawa: This simply won’t do. Everywhere I look in Digitanna, there is happiness and joy. Yet here in Whatsisname, it is always dark and depressing. Even the landscape is twisted and evil. It’s not fair at all. Why must they laugh while I cry? Why do they get the pizza, and I get the crust?!
(On the sidelines, Takeru groans and slaps his forehead. Iori just shakes his head sadly.)
Oikawa: All this happiness only serves to deepen my loneliness. It angers me greatly. (Pauses, his head cocked to one side as if listening to someone.) Yes, you’re right, I do need a hug.
(Archnemon and Mummymon appear on the scene.)
Mummymon: Um, excuse me, boss, but who are you talking to?
Oikawa: The voice in my head--I mean, no one! No one at all!
Archnemon: Do you always talk to yourself?
Oikawa: Perhaps I’m just starved for intelligent conversation.
Mummymon: You know, it hurts when you say that. I mean, sure we’re evil Digimon, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t human!
Archnemon: Have I ever told you that you’re an idiot?
Mummymon: (Dreamily) Every day, my dear.
Oikawa: Silence! I have had enough of your dithering. Leave me.
Mummymon: Boss, do you need a hug?
Oikawa: Not from you!
Archnemon: Come on, Mummymon. Let’s sneak into Digitanna and find that CinderKen kid. It’s always fun to try and get a rise out of him.
Oikawa: Wait! Did you say...CinderKen?
Archnemon: Yeah. So?
Oikawa: Then you two have been going to the palace daily and you NEVER TOLD ME?!
Mummymon: Don’t get your panties in a twist.
Archnemon: Do you have a problem with that, boss?
Oikawa: You fools. If you can get into the palace then you can help me get my revenge on Digitanna. I will make them pay for being happy and peaceful!
Mummymon: What do you want us to do?
Oikawa: Tomorrow is the coronation ceremony. Tonight, I want you to sneak into the palace. There you will kidnap Prince Daisuke and bring him to me. His husband and the rest of the Royals will surely come to his rescue, and then, once I have them all in one place, I will destroy them!
Archnemon: Yes, sir!
Oikawa: Go! You have your orders. (Mummymon and Archnemon exit.) At last, I shall make those fools pay for my suffering. Mwhahahahahahahaha---(He starts coughing) Blasted maniacal laughter does a number on my throat. Somebody get me some lozenges!
(The curtain closes again, and Takeru and Iori walk back out to center stage.)
Takeru: Hmm. That didn’t sound too good, did it? Well, let’s see how things are going back in Digitanna, now that it’s the eve before the coronation.
Iori: All the kingdom is readying for the ascension of Prince Daisuke to the role of king. Or almost all the kingdom....
(The curtain opens again, revealing Ken stalking down the hallway of the palace. He is still dressed in his Kaiser outfit and looking quite put out.)
Ken: Coronation, smoronation. Stupid advisors tiring out my Daisuke so he actually sleeps in our bed. Without me! (Sighs) I’m so bored....
What’s the time?
Well it’s gotta be close to midnight.
My body’s talking to me, it says
“Time for danger.”
It says “I wanna commit a crime
Wanna be the cause of a fight
Wanna put on a tight shirt
And flirt
With a stranger.”
I've had a knack from way back
At breaking the rules once I learn the games
Get up - life's too quick
I know someplace sick
Where this boy'll dance in the flames
We don't need any money
I always get in for free
You can get in too
If you get in with me
Let's go out tonight
I have to go out tonight
You wanna play?
Let's run away
We won't be back before coronation day
Take me out tonight (meow)
When I get a wink from the doorman
Do you know how lucky you'll be?
That you're on line with the feline of Prince Daisuke
Let's go out tonight
I have to go out tonight
You wanna prowl
Be my night owl?
Well take my hand we're gonna howl
Out tonight
(Daisuke suddenly rounds the corner, yawning. Ken spies him and immediately dashes over to him, wrapping his arms around the prince’s neck.)
In the evening I've got to roam
Can't sleep in the city of neon and chrome
Feels too damn much like home
When the royal babies cry
So let's find a bar
So dark we forget who we are
And all the scars from the
Nevers and maybes die
Let's go out tonight
Have to go out tonight
You're sweet
Wanna hit the street?
Wanna wail at the moon like a cat in heat?
Just take me out tonight
Please take me out tonight
Don't forsake me - out tonight
I'll let you make me - out tonight
Tonight - tonight - tonight
(Ken plants a kiss right on Daisuke’s lips. As he starts moving in for the tongue, Daisuke pushes him away. Ken, unprepared for the rebuff, falls to the ground.)
Daisuke: Not now, Ken, I’m really tired. I’ll play with you later, ‘kay?
(Ken looks up at him, the hurt in his eyes obvious even behind his sunglasses.)
Ken: What do you mean, you’ll play with me later? What am I, your little pet who you only find time for whenever you’re in a good mood?
Daisuke: Geez, Ken, I didn’t mean it like that and you know it! Mom and Dad and Taichi have had me practicing for the coronation all day, and I’m completely wiped out. I really don’t have time for you right now.
(That strikes a nerve. Ken stands up, fighting off tears.)
Ken: Well, I’m sorry! I suppose the great prince has more important things to do than spend time with little peasant CinderKen! If that’s the way you feel then--then--then you can just sleep on the couch tonight!
(Ken turns and flees into the bedroom, slamming the door behind him.)
Daisuke: Wait, Ken! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that! Ken!
Ken: (from inside) Go away and leave me alone!
Daisuke: Ken!
Ken: I said go away!
(Daisuke finally gives up and sighs. He trudges off towards the couch, collecting Chibimon from where the Digimon was chewing on a potted plant as he walks off. Inside the bedroom, Ken throws himself on the bed, throwing off his cape and sunglasses as he goes. He plays with his hair for a moment, bringing it down into its normal position, and then rests his head on his hands, sniffling and close to tears. Minomon peeks out from under the bed and floats up next to him.)
Minomon: Ken-chan? What’s wrong?
Ken: (Sniffles) Nothing.
Minomon: Please don’t be sad, Ken-chan! I know something’s upsetting you.
Ken: It’s....it’s Daisuke. He told me to stop bothering him.
Minomon: Really?
Ken: Well...kind of. I was really bored and wanted to do something with him, but he said he was tired and didn’t have time for me. Didn’t have time for me, as if I was his little brother or something. (Sighs) Maybe I’m just over-reacting. I just don’t want him to--to--
Minomon: To what?
Ken: It’s just...we fell in love at first sight. But what if, for him, that’s all it was? First sight? What if he’s sick of me by now? Or what if the me he fell in love with is the one who wears spandex and sunglasses and carries a whip, and he doesn’t care for plain old CinderKen? I’m so afraid that I’m going to lose him, Minomon. Sometimes I would just like for the two of us to sit and talk, but I’m afraid that if we do, he’ll-he’ll decide that I’m not good enough for him.
Minomon: Don’t be ridiculous, Ken-chan. Daisuke loves you, I’m sure of it. Every part of you, not just the kinky part.
Ken: I don’t know. Maybe it really is just a fairy tale, that a prince could fall in love with a little peasant who sits by the fire and watches the cinders fly....
Impossible
For a plain yellow pumpkin
To become a golden carriage
Impossible
For a plain country bumpkin
And a prince to join in marriage....
(Ken sniffles and begins to cry)
Impossible...
(Meanwhile, Daisuke is still trying to figure out how to apologize when Ken refuses to even look at him. Chibimon isn’t helping, as he keeps trying to attack the plants.)
Daisuke: Do you think he’d like candy?
Chibimon: Mmm....candy....
Daisuke: What about flowers?
Chibimon: Mmm....flowers...
Daisuke: Or I could send him a card.
Chibimon: Mmm....card...
Daisuke: Is there anything you don’t eat? (Chibimon appears to have to think a bit about this one before answering.)
Chibimon: The grease trap.
Daisuke: This is serious, Chibimon! Ken’s really mad at me this time. He’s even madder now than the time I accidentally called him CinderKen.
Chibimon: Maybe you should bake him an ‘I’m Sorry’ cake. I’ll help!
Daisuke: The cook said that if I bring you into the kitchen one more time, he’s going to gut you with a steak knife.
Chibimon: Mmmm....steak knife...
Daisuke: Oy vey...
(A shadow falls across the prince. He whirls just in time to see Yamato wandering down the hall, a mirror in one hand and a bottle of hair gel in the other.)
Yamato: I feel pretty....oh so pretty...
Daisuke: Hey Yamato! Could you give me some advice?
Yamato: I feel pretty and witty and bright...
Daisuke: Hey! Yamato! (He pulls Yamato’s mirror out of his hand. Yamato blinks in surprise for a moment before grabbing it back.)
Yamato: That was awfully rude of you. It’s not polite to interrupt a person while he’s primping.
Daisuke: Um...sorry. I was wondering if you could give me some advice. Ken’s really mad at me and I need to think of a way to apologize.
Yamato: Well, if you were me, I’d say that all you would need to do is open the door and allow him to look at you, and he would instantly forget his anger. Unfortunately, you’re not me and so you haven’t the hair for it. Have you ever thought of going blond?
Daisuke: Uh....no.
Yamato: (Shrugs) Pity. (He brushes past Daisuke, continuing down the hall.) And next time, please keep your hands off my mirror, plebeian. (He moves around the corner and out of sight, singing to himself.) I feel pretty...
Daisuke: Hey! That’s your soon-to-be king who you’re calling a--a--a--What did he call me?
Chibimon: A plebeian.
Daisuke: Oh. What’s a plebeian?
Chibimon: I think it’s a type of cheese. Ooh, fern! (He dives out of Daisuke’s arms and starts chewing on the nearest potted plant.)
Daisuke: (Slapping his forehead) The richest guy in the kingdom, and these are the best romantic advisors I have?
Chibimon: Yay! Plastic!
(Daisuke sighs and grabs Chibimon. The two of them head into the royal living room, where Daisuke plops down on the royal couch.)
Daisuke: This is gonna be a long night...
Chibimon: Ooh, couch cushions! (Begins chewing on the cushions)
Daisuke: This is gonna be a real long night...
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Songs not mine from this part: Just one; "Out Tonight" is from the musical "Rent." (And I got a very funny visual of the Kaiser while I was writing that part, believe me.)
Okay, that's it for the first part of act one. Was that weird or what? And even scarier, this is shaping up to be longer than CinderKen was. Like i said before: Be afraid. Be very afraid.