but when you wipe there is nothing on the paper and there is no poo in the toilet.
God! That is scary!
THE TEFLON POO: The sort of poo which is so smooth and streamlined that it
virtually falls out of your bottom. You can see poo in the toilet but there is nothing
on the toilet paper.
THE HOT TAR POO: The kind of poo where even after 50 wipes you are still
getting staining on the paper so you have to put some bog roll between your bum cheeks
and in your underwear to prevent skid marks.
THE SECOND THOUGHT POO: Just as you think you`ve finished your poo and have
painstakingly wiped yourself clean and pulled your pants up to the knees,
you realize there is still some more poo to come. out.
THE LINCOLN LOG: The kind of poo that`s so huge you`re afraid that it will not
flush down the toilet unless you break it up into little pieces with the bog brush.
This poo only happens when you are at somebody else`s house.
THE SWEETCORN POO: Self explanatory.
THE "I WISH I COULD POO" POO: You really fell as if you need a poo but every time you try
to dump your load, all you manage is a couple of farts.
THE SIDE BIRTH POO: This poo hurts so much that you swear it`s coming out sideways,
your eyes water and you will probably need stitches.
THE FISHERMAN`S BOBBER POO: You do your poo and flush two times but there is still a floater at several golf ball size pieces floating above the
the water line.
THE SULTANA POO: This type of poo is really frustrating. You get yourself prepared for a
"SIDE BIRTH" and spend about half an hour sweating it out on the bog, but all you manage in the
end is a small plop resembling a sultana.
Gooey Pooey:- This has the consistency of tar, You wipe 12 times and you still don't come
clean. In fact, you couldn't get it clean with gasoline on a rag.
Pop A Vein In Your Forehead Poo:- This is the kind of poo that killed Elvis. It doesn't want
to come out until you're all sweaty, trembling and purple from straining so hard.
Weight Watchers:- You poo so much that you lose several kilograms.
Right Now Poo:- You better be within 30 seconds of a toilet. You burn rubber getting there.
Usually it has it's head out before you can get your pants off.
