Jokes

Unanswerable Questions:

1. Why are there locks on the doors of 24 hour convenience stores?
2. If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
3. If there is no God, who pops up the next tissue in the box?
4. When a cow laughs, does milk come up its nose?
5. Why do they put Braille on the number pads of drive-up banking windows?
6. How do they get the deer to cross at those yellow road signs?
7. If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
8. Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
9. Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
10. Why do kamakize pilots wear helmets?
11. How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
12. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
13. When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
14. Does fuzzy logic tickle?
15. Do blind Eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs?
16. Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped
people at the Special Olympics?
17. Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one unit?
18. Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
19. If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
20. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
21. When sign makers go on strike, who paints their strike signs?
22. If it's the end of the world, what happens next?
23. If your fly didn't have wings, would it be called a walk?
24. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?
25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
26. Why don't you ever see the headline: "Psychic wins lottery?
27. Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
28. Why is a boxing ring square?
29. Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice?"
30. Why does lemon juice have artificial flavoring, and dishwashing
detergent made with real lemons?
31. Why is the third hand on a watch called the second hand?
32. Why don't they have mouse-flavored cat food?
33. Can fat people go skinny dipping?
34. Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
35. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times,
does he become disoriented?
36. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't
people from Holland called Holes?
37. Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
38. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
39. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
40. Why are wise man and wise guy opposites?
41. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they be called Fed Up?
42. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
43. What ever happened to Preparations A-G?
44. Are there interstate highways in Hawaii?