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CHAPTER 26 It was two days later when Ebony arrived. She had Raine on her arm, and glowed with what would have been a smile on most normal people. Since Ebony wasn’t one to smile, she was simply radiant. Kim met her in the hall outside their apartments, greeting Raine quickly before asking how the hell Ebony had managed to get advanced tickets to a Sisters of Mercy concert, and whether or not she would be accompanying them when they went back to Germany for the show. “I bought three tickets.” Ebony let go of Raine, and he headed towards the apartment with their bags. “I wouldn’t want the front grrl of my own band to kill me over Andrew Eldritch, would I?” Kim shrugged. “I never know what’s going on in that dark mind of yours, Eb.” She glanced past Ebony, at the receding image of Raine. “Though I must admit I know more about the workings of your mind than his.” “I’m sure he prefers it that way.” Ebony gazed back at Raine for a moment, then she took Kim’s arm and started walking back to Kim’s own flat. “I have to talk to you, oh great band leader.” “And will you be sarcastic for the entire conversation, or is it just the opening perk?” Ebony shook her head. “I want to be serious today, as serious as is possible.” “Wow. Should I be worried?” “I don’t know yet.” Kim opened the door to her apartment and let Ebony in. “Even you aren’t often serious, Eb. What’s up?” After giving Kim a pained look, Ebony gathered herself and held it all in again. She wandered over to chest of drawers that was pushed against the wall, and touched a blue streak that was on the mirror. “You had your hair done recently.” “Day or two ago, yeah.” “You two grrls are rather messy.” “Eh, it’s nothing like the first time.” “That’s good, considering that we’re never allowed to set foot in that hotel again.” Kim smiled, wishing Ebony would do the same for once. “Yeh. It’s great to be kicked out of a fancy place like that, isn’t it?” “Kimberly, I want to marry Raine.” Ebony said it as quickly as she could, avoiding looking anywhere even remotely close to Kim. A bit shell-shocked, Kim stared at Ebony, wondering if she’d heard properly. What else could Ebony have just said, though? “Marriage...” The word didn’t seem real to Kim. “He hasn’t asked me. He wouldn’t. It’s below him. He knows we’re forever, and doesn’t need to ask me to verify it. But I’d like to actually go through with at least a ceremony, if not the real licensing and legality.” “I can’t see you wearing white.” “Why wear white? It would be a lie. No one in this band, with the exception of Chatha and maybe Jessie, is a virgin.” “Black doesn’t work for weddings, Eb m’dear.” “Red. You’ve seen Beetljuice.” “You want Lydia’s wedding dress?” “No. I’d design my own. But I do want that shade of red.” “Will Raine agree to this?” “Yes, he’ll humor me if I want to do something like this. Besides, what goth boy in his right mind wouldn’t want to be married to the most infamous goth grrl this side of Germany?” “Ich weiss nicht,” Kim muttered. “Sprechen Sie Englisch, bitte.” “Fine. I don’t know. And it’s not worth it to talk to me in the polite form, luv.” “In the grand scheme of things, you are my superior. That can’t be denied.” “So are you asking me permission to marry him, asking my counsel, just telling me, what?” Ebony left the mirror behind and walked over to Kim. She picked up her hands and stared into her eyes. “Kim.” Her voice was soft. “I love him. I want you to tell me the band won’t kick me out if I do marry him. I’ll keep it low profile. The media doesn’t have to know that one of Kim Kissably’s grrls fell for something with a prick. But I can’t help having fallen for him.” “Does he actually have a personality under that dark, brooding countenance?” “Do I?” Ebony let the faintest smile slip. “He’s extraordinary. He lives and breathes goth. Everything he does is sensual, everything he says is spiritual.” “Unless he’s hung over.” The smile became a little more honest. “There is that.” “You know I don’t believe in that whole love thing, Ebony. For a thing with a prick or a grrl, it just doesn’t seem real to me.” “So let me put it another way.” Ebony let go of Kim’s hands. “Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” “So said Catherine Earnshaw to Nelly about her love of Heathcliff. You know how best to manipulate me with my obsessions, I see.” “I observe things, Kim. I understand them. I know things about everyone in our band that they won’t even admit to themselves.” “Oh, and what do you know about me even remotely like that?” “You loved Gwendolyn.” Kim turned away, feeling like she’d been hit. “You can’t know that.” “Can’t I?” “How could you?” Ebony didn’t answer the question, just watched Kim steadily. This agitated Kim, who took to pacing, wringing her hands every once in a while. Finally, when the silence became unbearable, she whirled around to glare at Ebony. “How can you always be so bloody confident? Hm? Everything that comes out of your mouth is a statement of fact. Even your bloody questions are so directing; everything is what you want it to be, isn’t that right? Isn’t that bloody right? You are so bloody maddening!” Ebony continued watching in silence. “So bloody what if I loved her? So bloody what? It doesn’t matter anymore! It can’t matter, it won’t matter, don’t you bloody ask me to let it matter!” Frustrated, Kim shook her head vehemently. “You don’t bloody know anything! How can you be so sure of yourself?” Waiting for a moment, letting Kim breathe slower, Ebony finally spoke. “If you act like you’re sure of yourself, you’ll become that. If you act like you know things, you’ll learn. Take a step backward every once in a while, Kim Kissably. Watch the world before it gets sick of watching you.” “I don’t need any of your bloody cryptic gothic advice. This is so like you. So bloody full of yourself, you make me sick!” “Do I?” “There you are, leading again! Quit leading! Anything I say, you just deflect it back at me. Why do you bloody do that?” “Testing limits, I suppose. I’m sorry, Kim. Never should have mentioned Gwen.” Kim found herself a chair and sank into it, her head spinning. She hunched over, ignoring Ebony for a while. When she tuned back into reality, she glared at the goth grrl. “You had no bloody right.” “I know. I’m sorry.” “I should have kicked you out of the band when I lost her. Don’t need any bloody goth hanging around to bring images of her back.” “I know.” “No, you don’t! You don’t know. Quit bloody saying you do. You don’t know, can’t know, can’t be inside my bloody head!” “I’m sorry.” “Why do I keep you around? You and your bloody boyfriend are a depressing, maddening lot... Go ahead, marry the bugger. You have my blessings. If you’ll put your goth as fuck nature to some good use.” “Meaning?” “Start that clothing design company of yours. You and Raine have wanted to for the longest time. What were you going to call it? Angelic Darkness?” “Yes.” “You and Raine start that. So you have something in case the band folds. You were meant to do something much broader and gother than this band, Ebony Darkness. Please don’t waste away with the rest of us.” “None of us are wasting, Kissably. At least, no more than we would anywhere else. So it’s a turbulent band, but that doesn’t matter. It gives us a raw power. We’ll last a few more years. I have yet to be wrong.” Kim sighed. “Ebony?” “Yes?” “I want to have a talk with your boy before you marry him. Promise you’ll make him actually communicate with me?” “I’ll do my best.”This chapter quotes Emily Bronte's Wuthering Heights. Go read it! |
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