DISCLAIMER: You all know the drill - Paramount is God. All hail Paramount. They own everything in the Star Trek Universe - I'm just
using my overactive imagination to take their characters where they refuse to go. All in the name of fun, not profit (I wish).

RATING: PG-13 Nothing my momma couldn't read.

<< BACK TO PART VIII: THE FIGHT

THE LONG ROAD HOME - AWAKENINGS

PART IX: THE STATUS QUO

Something was definitely going on.
Tom looked around the bridge with a concerned frown. The situation between Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay, whatever it was, had improved only minimally in the two days since their fight in Astrometrics. The tension on the bridge was less noticeable, although it was still there, but Tom still had the impression that his commanding officers weren't speaking to each other more than necessary. Chakotay had said barely volunteered ten words during this morning's briefing, and when the Captain had addressed him he had been as brief as possible.
The Captain had left the bridge as soon as her shift was over, as per her habit over the last few days. Tom knew that was a bad sign -- she usually stayed on the bridge for hours after her shift was over. He couldn't even remember the last time she had left the bridge precisely at 1800 hours.
Chakotay was still on the bridge sitting in his chair, but his attention seemed to be elsewhere. He had spent the entire morning either staring out into space with a grim expression or pretending to concentrate on the console beside his chair.
Something was definitely going on.

Chakotay was aware of Tom's scrutiny, but he ignored it as he stared blankly at the console in front of him, finding it extremely difficult to concentrate. He was still deeply troubled over what was happening between him and Kathryn.
He couldn't believe how stupid he'd been in the days following their fight in the turbolift. He had been hurt when she'd pulled away from him, but he wished now that he'd given her some space and time to think instead of lashing out at her. He could have talked to her instead, tried to convince her that they could make a relationship work. Although that was what he had tried to do in Astrometrics, they had both been far too angry to have any kind of rational conversation. The better course of action, in hindsight, would have been to sit down with her and talk about it.
He realized now, after going over every detail of both their arguments in his mind, that she was probably just as hurt as him. He could still picture the pained expression on her face just before he had walked out on her in Astrometrics. He had been far too upset and angry to notice it at the time, but remembering it now gave him a pang of regret. At first, he hadn't been sure of the source of his regret � he was sorry she was hurt, but it was her own doing. She was the one who was refusing to pursue a relationship, not him. However, he had still felt as though he had done something wrong. It had taken him many hours of introspection to figure out why � he felt guilty because of the sacrifice she was making. She had all but told him that she shared his feelings, but she had put the welfare of the ship ahead of herself. He should have helped her with that decision and supported her, but he had been too absorbed by his own sense of loss and betrayal to consider what she was going through.
Until the heated argument in Astrometrics, they had barely spoken ten words to each other after the fight in the turbolift. Not that she hadn't tried � she had asked him twice to join her for lunch, but he had refused in such a manner that she had stopped asking. If they hadn't been speaking, it was entirely his doing, and he regretted it.

Tom was still watching Chakotay, but he moved his gaze to the turbolift when the doors opened and Seven stepped out. She moved around the railing and down the stairs towards Chakotay. He looked up at her when she approached him, and held his hand out for the PADD she extended towards him.
"Is the Captain in her ready room?"
Chakotay looked up from the PADD and stared at Seven for a few seconds before he shook his head. "She's gone to her quarters for the night." He kept his gaze on Seven just long enough to see her raise her eyebrow in surprise before he looked back at the PADD. When he had given the report a cursory inspection, he started to hand it back to her, but stopped midway and took it back.
"I'll take this to her," he said.
Taken aback, Seven looked at him for a moment before she nodded and went to leave the bridge.
Chakotay pushed himself out of his chair and moved slowly towards the turbolift. It was about time he and Kathryn tried to patch things up, and this was as good an excuse as any. Maybe if she was calmer he would be able to reason with her.

Kathryn slowly lowered her book and turned her head to look out the windows, watching the stars go by without really seeing them. It was quiet enough in her quarters to hear the gentle hum of the engines, but for once the silence disturbed her because it only added to her feeling of isolation. Despite seeing Chakotay every day, she felt his absence in her life keenly. They only spoke to each other when necessary. There were no more breakfasts in the mess hall, no more casual chats over coffee, no more relaxing dinners. She even missed him telling her to drink less coffee and not work so hard. She smiled sadly � their estrangement now felt almost as bad as when she had thought he was dead.
The chime on her doors startled her and she looked away from the window. "Come," she said quietly. She was surprised and relieved when her First Officer stepped quietly inside.
Her quarters were quiet and the lights were dim, so it took a few seconds for his eyes to adjust enough to see her. She was sitting in one of the chairs in the middle of the room, reading a book. Her feet were up on a footstool, and there was classical music playing softly in the background. She turned her head to the side when he entered, and she raised her eyebrows slightly.
"Commander," she said softly, closing her book. "What can I do for you?"
"I didn't think you'd want to wait until tomorrow to see these." He walked over and showed her the PADDs in his hands. She took them, and he stood stiffly with his hands at his sides.
"Seven's latest scans of the region," she said, perusing the information.
"She estimates it will take us about nine weeks to cross the disputed space, barring any course corrections to avoid the fighting."
She nodded and looked at the second PADD. Her eyebrow went up. "What's this?"
"A ship we encountered a few hours ago � an arms dealer who's working for the Kesseret. When we introduced ourselves he mentioned a ship that was looking for us, just like that trader we encountered a few weeks ago."
"Same story?"
He nodded. "A rumor about a cargo vessel looking for a ship called Voyager trying to get home from halfway across the galaxy." She frowned as he continued. "The arms dealer was able to give us more information than Taleth, though. We learned that the ship looking for us is probably an Hathoran trading vessel, and they may have been trying to negotiate passage through Brennin space just over a month ago."
"Hathoran � I don't think we've encountered that species, but they might have some kind of score to settle with us," she said after a minute. "Taleth mentioned a ship we destroyed, or something. We should go to full tactical alert, just in case."
"Yes, ma'am."
His addressing her like that struck them both, and they looked up at each other uneasily. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out and she closed it again. She removed her feet from the footstool and after a moment's hesitation he sat down on.
"What's happened to us, Chakotay?" she finally said in a whisper edged with sadness.
He considered for a moment, but before he could think of something to say she answered her own question.
"Never mind," she said. "I know what happened." She took a deep breath. "Where do we go from here?"
"I guess that's up to you," he said quietly.
She shook her head. "I can't do it, Chakotay. I won't."
He shut his eyes for a few seconds before he responded. "How can you turn away from this? I thought�I hoped that you�" He left the sentence hanging, but he could tell by the look on her face that he had gotten his meaning across.
It took a long time before she answered. "Whatever my feelings might be�that doesn't justify putting this crew at risk."
He noticed that she had avoided the question, and could feel his frustration rising again. He tried to stop it before the words formed on his mouth. He was able to hold his tongue for a few seconds but he finally blurted out, "Kathryn, we've been through this. I know that you think this is best for the ship, but � "
"But what?" she said, her voice taking on a hard edge. "You think I should put myself ahead of the welfare of 150 people?"
There it was. Her emotional shields that she kept so firmly in place had begun to fade for a second, but as soon as he tried to appeal to those emotions the shields went back up.
"No," he said carefully, trying to keep their conversation from escalating into an argument. "I think you need to realize that this doesn't threaten the safety of the ship."
"The welfare of the crew isn't the only issue," she said. "The command structure has to be maintained at all costs."
"If you're going to start listing rules and regulations, Kathryn, I don't want to hear it."
She exhaled sharply and looked out the window. "Chakotay," she said, with a slow shake of her head.
He watched her as she turned her head and stared out the window again. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her this upset.
"Is this how it's going to be from now on?" she said quietly. "We can't even have a conversation without getting into an argument." She gave a deep shuddering sigh. "I wish�" she began, but her voice trailed off and she continued staring out the window.
"What?" he said. "That you hadn't kissed me? That you hadn't let your guard down long enough for me to see how you feel?"
She turned to look at him, and he could see in her eyes that was exactly how she felt. "I wish things were the way they used to be," she said finally.
"Is that what you want?"
"Yes."
He watched her for a few seconds before he answered. "It's not that simple, Kathryn."
She looked at him for a long time before she nodded in saddened acceptance and looked back out the window. "I know."
He sighed in disappointment and dropped his eyes to the floor before looking at her again. He suddenly realized how important her friendship was to him, and he wished he had realized it sooner. She was still staring out the window, allowing him to study her without her knowledge. His eyes traced the contours of her face that were so familiar. She was so important to him - he couldn't bear to lose her friendship, even if it meant giving up on any chance of having something more with her. He vowed on the spot that he would stop pushing her to take their relationship to the next step. If she didn't want � no, that wasn't right. He knew she wanted the same thing as him. If she thought that being anything more than friends would interfere with her duty to the ship, he would have to accept that. He could live with his disappointed hopes as long as it meant she was still in his life. Her friendship meant more to him than anything else, and he would do whatever he had to do to preserve it.
"I'm sorry, Kathryn."
She turned back towards him, frowning in confusion.
"About the other day in Astrometrics," he continued. "I never really apologized. I was wrong to question you like I did, and I'm sorry."
"You're no good to me if you follow my decisions blindly," she reminded him. "But next time � "
"In private � of course," he said. "But that's not what I'm apologizing for." He reached over and rested his hand on her knee. "I agree with your decision about going around Brennin space. You know that's not what I meant."
She put down the PADD on the footstool and looked at him carefully, waiting for him to continue.
"You were absolutely right. I was bringing personal issues into our command decisions and I shouldn't have." He took a deep breath and decided that this was no time to hold anything back. "I was angry," he admitted. "Not with you, though. I was frustrated because I knew you were right about what you said in the turbolift. I'll admit I was disappointed, and I took that out on you unfairly. I know it must have been hard for you to make that decision." He looked her in the eye so she could tell that he meant what he was telling her. "I'm sorry, Kathryn."
"I never meant to hurt you, Chakotay," she whispered. She took his hand that was sitting on her knee.
"I know," he replied, and they sat in silence for a few moments, each basking in the comfort that they derived from the other's presence, a comfort that they hadn't really had in a long time.
"I still don't agree, you know," Chakotay said finally. "With what you said in the turbolift."
She sighed and closed her eyes, afraid they were going to start fighting again. "I thought you said I was right."
"I said you were right, but I don't agree with you."
She opened her eyes and looked at him in confusion. "I don't understand."
"You're right that we can't allow a relationship between us to affect the crew and the running of the ship. You think that means nothing can ever happen between us. I don't agree � I think we could make it work."
"I think we've already seen enough of what happens around here when we fight."
"Maybe�But we're working it out, aren't we?" He leaned closer to her. "Kathryn � can you honestly tell me that you don't think it would be worth the risk?"
She looked at him in silence. He was slowly breaking down her resolve that she had been building up, and she couldn't allow that. She leaned back in the chair and looked up at the ceiling. "I can't, Chakotay," she said, in a voice so quiet he had to strain to hear it. At first, he thought that she was answering his question, telling him that she couldn't deny that it would be worth the risk, but when he looked closer at her face he realized that was not the case.
"I can't," she repeated, sounding close to tears. He realized suddenly that she was trying to convince herself as well as him, and his hopes rose. Maybe he could change her mind after all.
"I can't just walk away from this," he said quietly, and she looked at him again, surprised that he wasn't upset or angry.
"I won't push you, though. I'll accept that for now," he explained, "But I'm not going to stop trying to convince you otherwise. Until I do, though, I'm more than happy just to be your friend and First Officer, if you'll have me."
Moved by his words, she smiled affectionately at him. "Of course I will."
He smiled, and instantly she felt the distance between them narrow. Some of the damage that had been done over the course of their two fights was repaired, and for that she was grateful. He was such an integral part of her life; she couldn't afford to lose his friendship or his support.
He got up to leave but her voice stopped him before he left the room.
"Chakotay�" She trailed off, uncertain what she wanted to say or how to express the relief she was feeling.
He smiled at her. "I know, Kathryn. Me too."
She returned his smile. "Good night."
"Good night, Kathryn."

* * *

The Captain looked up from her desk when the chime to her ready room sounded. "Yes."
She was unsurprised when Chakotay entered. He walked up to her desk and stood with his hands on his hips, raising one eyebrow.
"Something I can do for you?" she said, slightly annoyed.
"Aren't you calling it a night?"
She shook her head. "I have work to do."
He reached over and pulled the PADD she was reading out of her hands. "Hm�I can see that," he said playfully, his eyebrow going higher. "B'Elanna's monthly analysis of dilithium usage?"
She reached over and snatched the PADD back. "Something else I can do for you?"
"Come have dinner with me in the mess hall."
She looked up, surprised. She hoped the relief wasn't too obvious on her face when she realized that it was an innocent invitation.
"I've got a lot of reports to read," she insisted.
"Captain, your shift ended over an hour ago. Those reports will still be here in the morning."
She sighed, beginning to waver.
"Kathryn�"
"All right," she said, holding up her hand. "I'll just finish this one and I'll go over the rest tomorrow."
He nodded in satisfaction. "See you in the mess hall?"
She nodded, but she was already focused on the PADD as he turned for the door.
"Captain?"
She looked up at him as he stood in the doorway. "Hm?"
"If you're still in here in twenty minutes, I'm going to send Tuvok to drag you out."
She chuckled. "That won't be necessary, I promise."
He grinned at her and left.
She turned her attention back to the report, but looked up after a few seconds at the door where he had been standing moments ago. Despite her pretence of being annoyed, she had missed his attention to her well-being. His concern for her was one of the things that endeared him to her. It was a part of her day that she hadn't even missed until it was gone. She decided to take it as a good sign � perhaps their friendship wasn't beyond repair after all.

Chakotay was waiting for the Captain in the mess hall when he was approached by two of the Maquis crewmen, Ensign Tabor and Crewman Dalby.
"Could we have a word with you, sir?" asked Tabor.
"Sure. Have a seat."
Dalby glanced around. "Could we do it in your office?"
Chakotay glanced past them towards the door. Unless she had broken her promise about being there within twenty minutes, she should be arriving any minute, but the crew came first.
He nodded, and rose to follow them out the door. Just as they were leaving, they passed Commander Walker entering the mess hall.
Chakotay told Tabor and Dalby to wait up while he stopped Mark.
"Could you do me a favor?"

Captain Janeway entered the mess hall, and her eyes roamed the mess hall as she frowned -- there was no sign of Chakotay. Commander Walker was sitting at an empty table, and when he saw her he walked over to meet her.
"Commander Chakotay had something to take care of."
She smiled knowingly. "Let me guess. He told you to make sure I eat."
He put on an innocent expression. "Nothing of the sort. Of course, if you have to eat and I have to eat, we could always�"
She held her hand up to stop him with a chuckle. "Never mind, I can smell his interference a lightyear away. But I would love for you to join me for dinner."
"There's one thing I'd like to know before I agree to that, Captain."
"What's that?"
He grinned and leaned over to ask her quietly, "What's pleeka rind casserole?"
She couldn't smell the distasteful dish yet, and quickly realized that Mark had picked it up from Neelix, or one of the crew. She rolled her eyes dramatically.
"Not again," she groaned. She turned and whispered back to him. "Just be glad there's no leola root in it."
"Leola what?"
"You don't want to know."
His eyes darted back and forth across her face for a moment before he winced. "Too late," he muttered. "I can tell that you didn't enjoy it."
She laughed and they moved towards the kitchen. "That's nothing � you should have seen his first attempts at coffee."
He grimaced. "No thanks. Coffee the consistency of molasses? That's just wrong."
She turned to him as they waited to get their food. "You're very good," she said carefully, referring to his telepathic abilities. She wondered how much he knew about what was on her mind concerning Chakotay � that was definitely something she wanted to keep private.
"Your mind is very focused. It makes it easier to pick up thoughts. I didn't mean to upset you, though," he added. "I'm very careful about what I pick up � I don't probe or anything. I'll try to stop since it's making you uncomfortable."
She waved him off. "Don't worry about it. I can't believe that my mind's that interesting to read. If you're looking for ship gossip, though, I recommend Tom Paris."
He chuckled, and they reached the front of the line.
"Captain!" said Neelix jovially. "Good to see you. You picked a good day to join us for dinner � it's pleeka rind casserole today."
"Lucky me," she said with a smile and a sideways glance at Mark. He tried to keep from laughing as Neelix gave them both heaping servings of the meal.
Eyeing their plates warily, they made their way to a table and sat down.
She sighed as she poked at her food. "You know, Neelix may be an invaluable member of the crew, but it's days like this I wonder why I ever let him cook."
"Well, I understand he's convinced Lieutenant Paris to organize a ship-wide pool tournament on the holodeck to take their minds off the 24-hour tactical alert."
She looked up from her plate. "Sandrine's?"
He grinned. "And I understand you're quite good at it. You should give our Lieutenant Blake a run for his replicator rations."
"Oh, I won't be playing."
"You're just going to let my crew walk all over yours then, are you?"
"Not at all. Lieutenant Paris is quite proficient himself."
"Well, if I can't convince you to participate I hope you'll at least show up to watch Nathan wipe the floor with Mr. Paris."
She sighed and shook her head with a chuckle. "You've been talking to Chakotay."
"What makes you say that?"
She merely stared at him and raised an eyebrow.
"He thought it would be good for the crew if you came."
She continued to stare at him, and her eyebrow climbed higher.
Mark gave up. "And he thought it would be good for you to relax."
She chuckled. "That man is incorrigible."
"He thought I might have more success since --"
"Since you're telepathic? It figures he would recruit somebody to read my mind for him."
Mark smiled to himself and looked down at his plate.
"Something funny?" she asked.
"Not really." He took a bite of his food, and then looked at her again. "Are you sure he's not a telepath?"
"Who � Chakotay?" She laughed. "Not that I'm aware of. Why?"
"Because I think the last thing he needs help with is reading your mind."
The smile on her face faded immediately. That was too close to the truth for comfort. "I think so too, sometimes," she said carefully, wondering whether Mark could sense her feelings for Chakotay.
"And I have a feeling you can read his. I've never seen anything like it," he continued, amazed. "Except maybe in people who've known each other their whole lives. You've only known each other seven years?"
"Almost � but that's a long time when you're isolated on a ship."
"Maybe," he conceded. "But still, it's incredible. I noticed it when we were on the Vaadwaur ship, but I'm amazed that I can still sense it now."
She knew that she should change the subject, but her curiosity got the better of her. "What, exactly?"
He thought for a moment. "It's hard to describe, really. It's like�your minds are working together. You're connected somehow. Sometimes it's almost impossible to distinguish your thoughts when I'm with you together. You each know what the other is thinking, what they're feeling, what they're going to say next. Your thoughts both follow the same path."
"Great minds think alike," she chuckled sarcastically.
"That's exactly it � you do think alike. It's like you're on the same page before either of you says anything."
"That's what comes of working with someone for seven years."
"It's more than just that, and you know it, Captain. You don't just work well together, you understand each other completely." He leaned forward and lowered his voice. "I get the sense that he knows you better than you know yourself. Better than anyone around here does."
"Even you?" she said, raising an eyebrow.
He chuckled and shook his head. "I may be empathic but I'm only scratching the surface. You and Chakotay know each other on a much deeper level."
She thought about it for a moment while she ate and realized that he was right � Chakotay knew her extremely well. She had a feeling that he understood her like nobody ever had � not even her ex-fianc�.
When that thought crossed her mind, she froze. Comparing Chakotay to Mark back home had implications that she didn't want to consider right now, especially in the present company.
"It's a shame more command teams aren't like that," continued Mark, and he shook his head. "They should strand every First Officer and Captain in the middle of nowhere for a few years � the command structures would be a lot more efficient."
She stabbed at her food with her fork. "It can cause more problems that it solves, sometimes," she muttered, then froze. That had slipped out accidentally � she hadn't meant to reveal that much about the recent problems between her and Chakotay, especially with a Betazoid across the table from her. She glanced at him, and could tell by the way he was nonchalantly toying with his food that he had picked it up. She was grateful when she looked over his shoulder and saw Adin Jarel making her way towards their table.
"Lieutenant," said the Captain as she joined them. "Care to join us?"
"Thank you, Captain," said the young Bajoran, "But I've got other plans." She turned to Mark. "Don't tell me you've forgotten already."
He winced. "Oh, right."
"Velocity? On the holodeck? 1900 hours?"
He frowned and glanced at the chronometer. "It's only 1903. Is it my imagination of did I have to reprimand you twice for being late for duty shifts when you were first assigned to the Yukon?"
"Actually, sir, it was three times." She grinned. "I just figured you had chickened out. You've never beaten my Bajoran reflexes in five years."
"You're a year out of practice, Jarel. And don't forget I know your moves before you make them." He pushed his chair back from the table and stood up with a grin. "We'll see who chickens out." He turned to the Captain. "If you'll excuse me, Captain."
"Don't let me get in your way."
He nodded and started to follow Jarel, but when he passed her chair he leaned down and spoke close to her ear. "I meant what I said, Kathryn. Finding somebody who knows you that well is rare � it's a once in a lifetime thing. It's a shame to just sit there and try to return to the status quo when it could be so much more � for both of you. There may be risks involved, but maybe it's something that's worth fighting for."
She was too surprised to reply right away, and before she had recovered he was gone and she was sitting alone at the table.

* * *

Chakotay entered Astrometrics and was surprised to see how many people were gathered there. Dalby and Tabor had asked him yesterday to pool his three minutes of comm time with theirs and use it to contact the Federation ambassador to Cardassia and see what could be done about Sveta and the other Maquis still in prison. Despite his plans to contact his sister, he had agreed to donate his comm time for the cause. Of course, they had wanted him to speak for all of them.
"I guess I'll have quite an audience for my little chat," he chuckled. There were almost a dozen of his former crew, including Tabor and Dalby, gathered around his desk in anticipation of his conversation with the ambassador.
"We're just here for moral support, sir," said Crewman Gerron with a grin.
"As long as it's quiet moral support," said Chakotay, pointing a finger at the gathered officers. "We won't get anywhere if all of you start talking or yelling at once. No matter what the ambassador says, I don't want to hear a word from anyone until we're done talking � is that clear?"
A chorus of "Yes sirs" came from the gathered Maquis, and they obediently moved over to the side of the room where they would be out of sight of the viewscreen. Seven turned around from where she was working and nodded at Chakotay just as the monitor began to flicker. When the image cleared, the frowning face of Ambassador Patkin appeared on the screen.
"Commander Chakotay, I presume?"
"That's right, Ambassador. I'm glad you agreed to speak to me."
"Well, I'm a busy man, but I'll admit I was curious when Starfleet said that I would be getting a call from the Delta Quadrant."
"I'd tell you about it, but I'm afraid we don't have much time for small talk � our comlink will only be active for a few minutes."
"Very well � what can I do for you?"
"I'm calling on behalf of myself and several of my crew. We understand that several Maquis are still being held prisoner on Cardassia."
"There are many prisoners still on Cardassia�but yes, some of them are Maquis."
"Is there any chance that they'll be released?"
The Ambassador snorted. "You're obviously not familiar with Cardassian prisons."
"As a matter of fact, I am � more than I'd like to be."
"If that's true, then you should know that nobody gets released."
"Well, I understood that there was a new government. I thought they might be more receptive to diplomacy."
"Just because there's a new government doesn't mean they're any more lenient towards prisoners of war � the Maquis in particular."
"Some of those Maquis are our friends and colleagues. We were hoping �"
"Colleagues?" interrupted the Ambassador. "What were you doing collaborating with criminals? Is Starfleet Command aware that some of their officers were involved with the Maquis?"
Chakotay saw some of the officers tense up out of the corner of his eye, and he frowned at them to make sure they kept quiet.
"We're not originally Starfleet officers � we were Maquis ourselves. When we were stranded in the Delta Quadrant seven years ago we merged with Captain Janeway's crew and have been serving under her ever since. We heard from some of our friends back home about the Dominion war and the destruction and imprisonment of the Maquis. Now, we were hoping you could use your position on Cardassia to get the Maquis prisoners released."
"Absolutely not," snapped the Ambassador. "It's out of the question."
He saw some of the crew get angry again, and he held up his hand to restrain them. "Why? It's not as if they pose a threat to Starfleet, or even the Cardassians. The Maquis were slaughtered by the Dominion � surely there's no reason to imprison those who survived."
"It doesn't matter," he replied gruffly. "Our relationship with the Cardassians is still fragile and I'm not going to risk a diplomatic incident because a few of your terrorist friends are in jail."
"Can't we at least discuss �"
"There's nothing to discuss," he interrupted. "Good day, Commander."
With that, they were cut off and the screen went blank. Chakotay sighed and over at the officers gathered near the wall. Some of them were shocked, some were dejected, and many of them were angry.
"Why would Starfleet pick such an incompetent moron as an Ambassador?" asked O'Donnell.
"To get him away from them, obviously," retorted Jarvin. "If he's on Cardassia they don't have to put up with him." "I'm surprised they would pick somebody so obviously prejudiced against the Maquis," said Ayala, one of the few who had managed to remain calm. "Ambassadors are supposed to be neutral."
"They wouldn't let him on Cardassia if he sympathized with us," pointed out Jarvin.
"Call him back!" insisted Crewman Chell.
"It's no good � he's not going to listen," said Crewman Jor resentfully.
"Then we'll make him listen!" interjected Dalby.
"Everybody calm down," said Chakotay, taking a step towards them. "He won't help us, so we'll find somebody else who will. There's nothing we can do about it right now, so why don't we discuss this some other time."
"While our friends just sit in Cardassian prisons?" asked O'Donnell.
Chakotay frowned at him. "Not now," he said, in a voice that indicated it was an order.
Most of the gathered officers started to file out, and most thanked him for the effort as they left. Soon the only ones left in the room were Tabor, Jor, Chell and Dalby.
"What a waste of comm time," said Jor with a sigh.
"We've still got seven minutes," said Tabor. "Did you still want to call your sister, Commander?"
Chakotay thought for a moment, and a new idea came to him. "Do any of you have somebody you want to contact?"
"Not me," said Tabor.
"I don't have anybody," offered Kenneth Dalby.
"I've got a sister, but my time is in three days, so I can wait," said Jor.
"All our friends that aren't on Voyager are either dead or in prison," added Chell.
Chakotay nodded and moved over to where Seven was working. "Are you calling your sister, Commander?" asked Jor.
"No," he said with a smile. "We may not have anybody back home anxious to talk to us, but I know somebody who does. Can you put me through to Pathfinder headquarters?" he asked Seven.
She raised an eyebrow, but nodded and turned back to her console.
After a few seconds, the face of an unfamiliar ensign appeared on the large Astrometrics screen. "Yes?"
"I'm looking for Lieutenant Barclay," said Chakotay, moving back to the middle of the room.
"Hey, Reg!" yelled the ensign over his shoulder. "There's a transmission here for you."
Lieutenant Barclay's face came into view and his eyes widened when he saw who was at the other end. "C-Commander Chakotay � what a p-pleasant surprise. How are things in the..uh..Delta Quadrant?"
"I'm afraid I don't have time to chat, Lieutenant � I was hoping you might know how I could reach Phoebe Janeway."
"I can find out � we have contact information for everyone on Voyager. Just a minute."
The eyes of the others in the room widened in understanding and they grinned. "See you later, Commander," said Tabor, and they filed quickly out of the room. He nodded at them and turned back to the terminal as Reg spoke again.
"Yes, here it is. Uh�she's on Bajor. Do you want me to put you through directly?"
"Yes, if you don't mind."
"I'm setting up the comlink now."
The screen went blank, and while he waited Chakotay hit his commbadge. "Chakotay to Janeway."
Janeway here.
"Could you come down to Astrometrics right away? It's urgent."
I'm on my way.
Just then, a woman's face appeared on the screen in front of Chakotay. She looked to be about forty, but she was quite pretty and had long reddish blond hair pulled up behind her head. Her face was smudged with brown clay, and she was wiping more clay off her hands with a small towel. He thought he could see a family resemblance, but he wanted to make sure who she was.
"Phoebe Janeway?"
"Yes," she replied with a smile. He could see the resemblance even more when she smiled � she had the same amused and curious look on her face that Kathryn got sometimes.
"I'm Commander Chakotay," he said. "I'm your sister's First Officer."
Her smile got even wider. "Kathryn? You're calling from Voyager?" The smile faded quickly, though, and her face clouded over. "Oh God," she said nervously. "Did something happen to Kathryn?"
"No, she's fine," he assured her. "As a matter of fact, she's on her way here as we speak."
Her shoulders sagged with relief and she smiled again. "If you don't mind me asking, why am I talking to you instead of her?"
"She refused to take comm time away from her crew since she talks with Starfleet for a few minutes a day."
"Sounds like Kathryn � I suppose you had to trick her into talking to me."
Out of the corner of his eye, Chakotay saw Seven of Nine glance at him with a smirk.
"Not really�but she doesn't know she's going to talk to you yet. Three of us pooled our comm time, but our conversation was shorter that we anticipated so we're giving her what's left. If she's fast enough getting here you should have about five minutes."
"Thank you." She paused for a moment and then leaned closer to the screen with a hand under her chin, a gesture Chakotay had seen Kathryn use dozens of times. "Can I ask you something � is she lonely?"
"I think she is sometimes," he admitted, "But we all do our best to keep her from feeling isolated."
"I'm glad to hear it. I'm sure she's in good hands."
The doors slid open and Kathryn strode in. She didn't even get half a step before she saw the familiar face on the screen and froze. She looked quickly at Chakotay before taking a few tentative steps towards the middle of the room.
"Phoebe!" she said, still reeling from the surprise.
"Hello, Kathryn. It's good to see you."
She looked at Chakotay in disbelief. "I thought you were having some trouble with the Ambassador."
"We were," he said with a mischievous grin. "He cut us off."
"You said it was urgent."
Phoebe huffed. "What, talking to your favorite sister isn't urgent?" she said with mock annoyance.
"You're my only sister," retorted Kathryn as a smile spread slowly across her face. "But it's good to see you anyways. How are you?"
Chakotay started to step away from her to give her some privacy, but she shook her head and indicated to him to stay. He raised his eyebrows, but kept his position beside her. She gave his arm a quick affectionate squeeze before turning her attention back to her sister.
"I'm good," said Phoebe, her voice breaking. "I'm working as an art teacher here on Bajor and studying at one of their art institutes. I was out of touch for a while, and I hear I missed some excitement. Mom said you were kidnapped?"
"I'd rather not spend the few minutes we've got talking about that," said Kathryn firmly, trying not to get too emotional.
"Fine then � let's talk about you. How are you holding up?"
"I manage."
"Admiral Paris told Mom that you feel responsible for getting stranded out there. It's not your fault, Kathryn. You had no choice."
She didn't answer for a moment, but finally sighed. "You obviously don't know the whole story."
"I know you saved an entire civilization of people at the expense of not getting home. How would you have felt if you had let them all die just so you could get home?"
She smiled. "You sound like my crew."
"Well, I hope you're not just shutting yourself up in your quarters. That's what you always used to do when we were little and you felt guilty about something. Daddy used to have to come up and pull you out by your ears."
"I couldn't even if I wanted to. I even tried once, but Chakotay came to drag me back into the real world kicking and screaming all the way."
"Really?" she said with a smirk and a raised eyebrow. "I like you already, Commander." She leaned closer to the screen and her grin widened. "So�are you two�close?"
Kathryn cleared her throat and glared at her sister in an attempt to get her to lay off the innuendos.
"Very," she said. "He's one of the closest friends I've ever had."
"Fine, I'll ask you about it some other time."
"What about you? The last time we spoke, you were seeing somebody�a Starfleet diplomat?"
"That was eight years ago, Kathryn�didn't Mom tell you?"
"Tell me what?"
"I sent you a letter when we first made contact a few years ago�"
Kathryn shook her head. "The communications array we used was destroyed before we got all the letters."
Phoebe's eyebrows went up. "I guess she left it up to me. If I'd known you hadn't gotten my letter, I would have written you when they started using the MIDAS array. I just assumed you knew. I'm married � for over five years now."
"You're kidding," said Kathryn, surprised that her mother hadn't mentioned it at all. "Phoebe, that's wonderful."
"His name's Liam. He's a music professor at Julliard back on Earth, but he took leave to come to Bajor with me."
"I'd love to meet him."
"Oh," said Phoebe, obviously disappointed. "He's not here. I know he'd be thrilled to meet you, too. He loves bragging to all his students that his sister-in-law is the best Captain in the 'Fleet."
"The best Captain in Starfleet? Same old Phoebe � exaggerating everything," said Kathryn with a soft chuckle.
"Says who? I'm not worried about whether you'll get home or not. I'm more concerned about you."
"I'm fine."
"That's what you always say. I'm serious."
"So am I � I really am fine."
"All right � but maybe Commander Chakotay and I can have a little chat again sometime, and if he tells me different�"
"Don't believe everything he tells you." Kathryn gave Chakotay an affectionate grin over her shoulder. "He worries about me way too much."
"Good � you need somebody like that in your life."
"I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself."
"Same old Kathryn � too independent for your own good. When are you going to let your guard down and admit that you need some companionship? And don't tell me you're not lonely. I can see it in your eyes and your First Officer isn't a very good liar."
Kathryn was saved the trouble of replying when Phoebe spoke again. "Oh, good. There's somebody here I want you to meet."
A rush of footsteps could be heard. "Mommy!" squealed a young voice. A young girl about three or four years old came into the picture and Kathryn's eyes widened as the child crawled onto her sister's lap.
"Hi," said the young girl when she was settled.
"Your daughter?" whispered Kathryn as her eyes became moist and lit up with a smile. She moved her hand over to squeeze Chakotay's hand resting near hers on the console.
Phoebe nodded, brushing the girl's short blond hair behind her ears. "I like to think she's your good luck charm � she was born on the exact day that Starfleet found out you were alive. She was only two days old when we got the good news." Phoebe turned away from her daughter and looked at the screen again. "We named her after you."
Kathryn's voice caught in her throat and she was unable to say anything before her sister continued, addressing the young girl in her arms, who had lost interest in the conversation and was playing with a small doll in her hands.
"Katie, this is your aunt Kathryn."
That got the girl's attention, and she looked at the screen in awe, her eyes wide in amazement. "The one on the starship?" she asked in disbelief.
"That's right," said Kathryn, her voice breaking.
"Voyager's very far away and you're trying to come home, and then you'll come see me and tell me all about your adventures."
"Did your mommy tell you that?"
Phoebe smiled and caressed the girl's cheek with her hand. "You're her favorite bedtime story," she said quietly.
Kathryn squeezed her eyes shut to hold back tears and took a deep breath. When she opened her eyes, she heard one of Seven's consoles beep.
"Only a few more seconds, Captain," said Seven quietly.
"We've only got a few more seconds before the link goes," Kathryn told her sister.
"It was nice talking to you, Kathryn," said Phoebe. "And thank you, Chakotay. If it weren't for you, I suppose it would have taken her months to get around to talking to me. And Kathryn � next time you divide up the comm time among your crew, take some for yourself, okay? Katie and I would love to talk to you again." The picture started to become distorted.
"I will," said Kathryn quietly.
"Bye!" said Katie, and her waving at the screen was the last thing Kathryn saw before the link was lost and the image faded.
Kathryn covered her mouth with her hand and tried not to cry. Chakotay reached over and put his hand gently on her back. When Kathryn had pulled herself together, she looked at him and spoke.
"I'm her favorite bedtime story," she whispered emotionally.
"By far your greatest achievement in the past seven years," he said with a smile.
"Did Commander Walker put you up to this?"
"What? No � the only time I've seen him this week was when we passed each other in the mess hall last night."
"He hasn't talked to you?" she said, surprised.
"No. Why?"
"No reason � it's just�I mentioned to him a few days ago that I would love a chance to talk to my sister and then today�" She paused and looked at him as if seeing him in a new light. "This was all your idea?"
"It was an impulse," he said. "We had seven minutes left and none of us has any real family to contact, so I automatically thought of you."
"What about your sister?"
He shrugged. "I would have liked talking to her, but�I hardly think I'm her favorite bedtime story."
She smiled, but then it occurred to her to wonder why there had been time to spare in the first place. "It didn't go well with the Ambassador?"
"That's putting it mildly. When he was finished accusing us of betraying Starfleet by collaborating with a bunch of terrorists, he refused to listen to us."
"I'm sorry, Chakotay." She patted him affectionately on the arm. "I'll see what I can do." She lowered her voice and whispered conspiratorially, "I have some friends in high places."
"That's not a good idea � I don't think you should be getting on Starfleet Command's bad side. I don't want you getting involved with this."
"After what you did for me today? Consider it my way of thanking you."
"Possibly jeopardizing your career is not my idea of thanks."
"Well, then what? What you did means a lot to me. How can I ever repay you?"
"Well, you can start by taking a break and joining us at Sandrine's tonight."
"Consider it done. I hear Lieutenant Blake's pool prowess will give Tom a run for his money."
He grinned. "You sure wouldn't want to miss that."
"See you tonight."

>> ON TO PART X : THE DECISION

<< BACK TO PART VIII: THE FIGHT

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