* Born to Japanese parents, and lived in Japan for 32 years.
* Lived with Australian wife in Britain for 7 years.
* Went back to Japan with my wife and 2 children, had an another child, lived there for 4 years.
I have been here for six years since I left Japan. In total, I have lived in English speaking society for 13 years.
On the other hand, my wife was born in Sydney, has lived in Western society most of her life, except the 4 years in Japan.
In the night time I work within the Japanese culture, to give Japanese clients the best customer services that I can as a telephone consultant, of course using the Japanese language. At home we only use English.
Everyday, I must switch my mind between the 2 cultures.
By living outside Japan I have understood that there are a lot of different ways of life between our 2 cultures, such as the different attitudes towards people. I agree that it is not a case of "good or
bad", about the differences, they are just different.
12 years ago I read a book called "The Japanese Mind" written by an American, Robert Christopher. He lived in Japan for about 40 years, loved it and has worked for the benefit of the two nations all his life. I understood his various points about how Japanese and Americans were different.
One of the most important developments in my life so far, was that five years ago I fortunately had the chance to start learning about the differences between men and women, particularly within marriage or similar partnerships. One of my work friends kindly introduced a book called "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus." So I borrowed her book. It was the beginning.
Which do you think is bigger-the difference between husbands and wives or between Western and Japanese?
Would you think about it for a moment, if you know some Japanese people or vice versa?
Sure, there is no right or wrong answer.
I had a big shock when I discovered that Men & Women are so different that it is as if we come from different planets. Again, I agree that there is no "right or wrong" in relation to the differences, we are just different.
Receiving these new insights, I have been inspired very positively, of course. I could take in many new skills, as if the sand in a desert was soaking up water.
Understanding my wife better than before, I could get new hope to keep and nurture my relationship with her.
As one of our big investments, we have two copies.
Surprisingly my wife sometimes expresses admiration about how I have changed in our relationship. I have broken out of stone-head mentality. This is my song that reminds me to be a smart man.
Four year ago we have started learning Positive Parenting skills.
While I only have a couple of parenting books, my wife has read about ten different ones.
The more the children grew the more limitation she felt to guide them. She attended several parenting workshops before, which helped her a bit.
I found that the author of Mars & Venus wrote a book about positive parenting, called "Children are from Heaven."
Reading the book, I gained many useful mental and practical skills.
Those skills worked immediately, so I introduced the book to my wife. Since then she also has being practising the Positive Parenting skills very usefully.
Because we noticed that we need reminders about using new skills in our busy lives, we regularly read the book and discuss any issues which arise.
Please sign Guestbook Your comment will not be open to public.
