| Well, hello dear journal. It's been ages since I've written! I think my last entry was sometime in July, whew! It just got to be such a pain doing this, it takes forever to update this journal. Anyway, here it's been a good 2 months since I've been here and unfortunately I have no losses to report. I have no idea how much I weigh because I won't step on a scale. I have only exercised 2 times the whole month of September, and I have been binge eating since the attacks. The trauma of that day put me over the edge I have to say. I suffer from depression anyway and that just sunk me to the pits of hell. And, just when I was starting to feel somewhat better from that, I started to have my lovely female problems. Even went through a couple of scary nights thinking I was pregnant! My period was late this month on top of all this other crap, I had to worry about that nonsense. I am happy to report that I started yesterday, *YES*!! By the way, September 11th is our wedding anniversary, lovely huh? 3 years of wedded bliss!! LOL!! That's really funny, hee hee. OK getting serious now, I am going to start Weight Watchers Wednesday. I hope I like it, and I think I will. It seems simple enough, basically doing what I've been doing all these months, simplified. I like being part of a group also, I think that will help. I think that my friend is going to join also, and that is always a plus too. Honestly, I don't think I've gained too much weight but it's hard to tell because I'm so bloated this month. I dread getting on those scales Wednesday, I'll tell you that. Well, hubby and I had been flip flopping on whether to try again for another baby before the attacks happened, we had decided that yes, we did want another. Well, after the crisis on September 11th, I decided that I no longer wanted to bring another life into this terrible world that we live in. And that's my final answer. Now, I'm trying to decide when to get my hysterectomy done. You know I've put that off about as long as I can. I bet my uterus is the size of an 8 month pregnant lady's. That's a no-shitter! It's bad being fat, it's worse looking pregnant, that is, when you aren't even preggars, LOL. I think I'm hanging up my gym pass until next summer. Just started hating it big time. No excuses, it was hard to find time to go because of the baby and all, but I do have available time, even if it's not optimum. I just simply don't want to! When I get signed up for WW and get going into that then perhaps I'll start doing my exercise videos again, who knows. I was not losing any weight exercising, but I was toning up nice, my legs were looking real good. They are definetly losing their tone now, but I really just can't seem to give a crap, lol. As far as I know I'm still 170 pounds, but I may be up to 180 by now, but I really don't think so. Of course the WW scales are going to probably weight heavier than mine do anyway, :( Gosh, I just don't want to step on that stupid scale. Well, gotta go, I'll try to update you again at least once dear journal. See you later. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!! |
