November 05
Monday, November 01-05
Kendo training. My kendo teacher walks around during ji-geiko, occasionally intervening to give advice. He shows me how my left hand should be more over the tsuka. He also says that I need to pressure my opponent more with the kensen from chudan. At the moment it is far too high.After the practice he advises me to practice this during my suburi: small movements from chudan to create pressure and control my aite. If this means getting hit less I am willing to try it!
He also points out that due to the suburi I am more inclined just to go through the motions that to make each suburi a strike. This is fair criticism - I have to go back to my philosophy of making each cut a real strike.
Day 408: Tuesday, November 02-05
I take my teachers advice and practice with more intent and concentrate more on generating pressure. It is difficult to do, but I guess this is more like the internal kendo (that's a sloppy term) that high grade kendoists demonstrate.
Day 409: Wednesday, November 03-05 - Day 410: Wednesday, November 03-05
More of the same.
Thursday, November 03-05
Kendo training. With the rugby internationals just around the corner the French people I train with are starting to twist the knife a little - all good stuff. I have been missing the hostility.We do kata and I practice some of the kodachi kata. I have only 1.5 months before my exam and, frankly, much work to do before now and then.
We do ji-geiko. It might sound strange, but I see a new opportunity to strike debana waza, but only after the practice has finished. I realise that against some opponents I can pressure them into attack, but miss the chance to counter-attack.
A good training.
Day 411: Friday, November 04-05
I take my random daughter for a walk. Rather than decide the course I let her go where she wants. As a result we spend a lot of time standing in puddles.I do my suburi and then, magically, my wife and I go out for the evening. BY OURSELVES!
Saturday, November 05-05 - Sunday, November 06-05
I get hit my a blockbuster migraine and spend the weekend in bed. No suburi.
Monday, November 07-05
Kendo training. There are lots of seniors present. We do some interesting kihon and then lots of ji-geiko, ippon-shobu and finish with and exercise where two people fight for ippon and the winner is immediately challenged by someone from the ring of onlookers.I have some good fights, but curse myself for landing a men on my teacher, then losing confidence and not showing zanshin.
It is a really high speed practice and I am pleased with my kendo at the end.
Nothing particular to report - simply that I can't sleep in the afterwards and I play and replay my various encounters in my head.
Tuesday, November 08-05
Kendo training for five clubs in the area. I distinguish myself by forgetting my kendo-gi and doing the session in a hakama and T-shirt. This provokes much piss-taking. 'Have you been doing kendo a long?' someone asks me.Despite leaving the dojo with what feels like a broken elbow, this turns out to be a very interesting session. Because I am only wearing a T-shirt I notice when I am breathing from my stomach and when I am simply gulping air into my upper chest.
I make a conscious effort to breathe properly and I suddenly feel as if I have a solid foundation for my kendo.
Added to this, during the day I read a very interesting article called 'fix your face'. I kind of reminds me of a training course I attended recently where the teacher told us she had consciously decided never to cross her arms or legs.
The upshot of these two bits of advice made me open myself, or, to put it another way, uncross my mental arms.
I wouldn't call this instant nirvana, but I think these things are worth considering.
Day 412: Wednesday, November 09-05 - Day 416: Thursday, November 17-05
I go away for a few days, but keep up with the suburi. I notice that when I control my breathing then my strikes become more convincing and focussed.
Kendo practice is good too, but I note that there is less than a month before the exam and I feel anything but ready.
I continue to concentrate on my feet, hips, controlling centre and seme. I also continue to worry and fret about my kata.
Day 417: Friday, November 18-05 - Day 419: Sunday, November 20-05
My brother's come for the weekend so it's a case of doing the suburi before getting drunk - so it's a case of doing the suburi at about 6am. But not even this helps - we stop drinking at around 2.30am and start with the brandy for breakfast.
I note that in some way I am still afraid to cut. Perhaps not consciously, but there are still unvoiced questions in my head 'Will it be a good cut?', 'Can I do this?'. I cut these out, relax and feel better. I go back to my original thought of making sure I make one good strike, then another.
On Saturday we go to watch the NZ cheat and weasle there way to victory against England. Then we have to watch the England captain say how bitterly disappointed he was by England's performance. It shouldn't be him saying that - it should be Graham Henry and his cohorts. These All Blacks! tsk.
Monday, November 21-05
Kendo training. We have a big competition next weekend so the emphasis is on ji-geiko and ippon shobu. It's not a time to over-intellectualise things so I focus just on fighting spirit.
Recently I feel as if I have become too relaxed in training. I used to be able to rely on a kind of gung-ho factor to lift my game, but this seems to have gone. I can't decide if this is a good or bad thing, but suspect that it has decreased the intensity of my kendo.
I wonder how to account for this. Is it because I am less involved in the life of the club due to having a child? Or is it because, as I read on the BBC website recently, men become less aggressive when they are looking after children? Or might it be a result of spending a lot of time practicing by myself that I can't go to another level in the dojo?
After training we do kata. I note that when I really relax my hands my strikes become cleaner. I resolve to use this in ji-geiko too.
A good session. I leave the dojo in a buoyant mood.
Day 420: Tuesday, November 22-05 - Day 421: Wednesday, November 23-05
I take the lessons of the dojo home and practice suburi with very relaxed hands. In doing so I realise that the looser you hold the bokken - or shinai - the easier it is to make tenouchi. This makes logical sense if you consider that tenouchi is a kind of squeeze and the harder you hold the tsuka the less room there is to make this movement.
This reminds me of holding a rugby ball as there is a way to hold it which is gentle enough to allow you to pass it and hard enough that it sticks to your hands.
I finish the sets with some Pilates exercises that my brother showed me over the weekend. This is partly to build core strength and partly to reduce further the size of my stomach. Actually, since I started to jog I have lost 6 KGs. The other day my teacher pointed to my stomach and asked forlornly 'Where's it gone?' I know how he feels - I miss it too.
Thursday, November 24-05
Kendo training - the last before the weekend. There are so many people in armour now that the floor becomes valuable real estate. I find myself forgetting how long people have practised for. Many of the so-called beginners have become shodan and there is new blood joining all the time.
We start with kata. I am still ironing out basic errors of form, although I feel slightly more confident of my ability. It also helps that my knees are getting stronger and I can sonkyo and do nanahon-me without physical difficulty.
We do a lot of kihonuchi, but I am still feeling the after effects of a migraine I had the day before and my performance is fairly lacklustre. Twice in a row I miss a simple kote during kote-uchi. I don't think I have ever done that before.
My ji-geiko is ok my I have to say that I am relieved when the training is over. Not so my teacher - and are taisho for the weekend - who is injured by a wild tsuki from our senpo. He seems to be in some doubt as to whether he can compete.
I also receive an email from a Maori friend of mine who writes: 'The only tense moment we had was when someone in the pub (English supporter of course) dropped their beer in frustration about the England team's total inability to cross the line in the last half hour of the match. Dear oh dear, that must have hurt... You had your opportunities, but if you want to play with men don't put boys on the pitch against us.'
Ka mate, as they say.
Friday, November 25-05
I skip a day. We have friends round and I only have time for 100 before they arrive. I am so exhausted that I fall asleep before they leave.
Saturday, November 26-05 - Sunday, November 27-05
We travel to the national championships. For the first time we field 3 teams as well as a junior in the individuals. This is a good reflection of how the club has grown in the last year or so. It also underlines the commitments we have made to train regularly and to build a team spirit which, I hope, reaches everyone in the club.
Shinai check, warm up and opening ceremony - the nerves begin to grow. We have reached the finals two or three times in the past. Can we overcome the final hurdle this year?
Our second and third teams start well, both winning in the first round. Our first team has a bye into the second round, but we skip this round as well as our apponents do not have enough members to field a team.
In the meantime our third team is eliminated, but not before putting up a spirited fight. Given that the majority do not have dan grades or much competition experience they do very well and their heads never go down. Our second team really takes the fight to the opposition and goes through.
For the first team, we are in the quarter finals without having raised our shinai in anger. We have to rev ourselves up against what looks like a physical team. Our first and second fighters both win so as chuken it's down to me to seal the victory. I try and keep in the centre of the shiaijo as much as possible to avoid being shoved out. It's not a pretty fight but I win by a point and we're in the semi-final.
On the other side of the table our second team qualifies too, so even if both teams lose now we're into the medals.
We're facing our local dojo and the rivalry is going to be fierce. But they line up without their men. What's happening? It seems they have a team member who is not eligible for the competition and, faced with the decision of fighting without him, they decide that if he cannot fight, they will not fight. So we're into the final.
Our second team gets eliminated at this stage which is disappointing for them. But it shows the strength that we have built as a club that our teams can compete against 1st teams from other clubs.
For us it is final time. The first fight is fast and furious, but not without humour. Our senpo wins it with a point. The next fight is tense and close and ends in a draw. I'm next.
'Do your job' says my teacher.
I walk up to the shiaijo and I feel... good. I remind myself that there is nothing else I could have done - without giving up alcohol - to prepare. It is an intense fight. I don't remember much of it, but I win with a kote-nuki-men and a debana-kote.
Our fukusho goes out. He lands a kote pretty quickly and successfully defends it. I think 'We're the champions', but it doesn't feel that way with one fight left.
The taisho-sen is a great fight - really electrifying, but I have the feeling that our teacher is not going to take a step back. He doesn't and he wins it 2-1.
In the evening there is a dan examination and I am asked to make up the numbers for the 3rd dan examinees. It is a good chance to do kata under exam conditions, although I don't feel nervous. Unlike my partner whose bokken shakes nervously throughout the 10 forms. Two from our club pass. Afterwards I ask for feedback on my kata and the 7th dan judge said that I must be careful not to break 'en', or connection, during ipponme.
As a club we retire happily to a Chinese restaurant for beer and Peking duck.
The next day is the individuals. I have two beginners in my pool, but I feel annoyed at how nervous I am. In the next two rounds I fight against some spirited opponents and thoroughly enjoy the matches. My next opponent, who goes on to win the championship, scores two points against me. Afterwards he tells me that he always enjoys fighting against me. I guess we share a kind of mutual respect, but I am still sorry to lose.
At the end of the individuals we end up with a silver and bronze in the Ladies competition and our junior gets another bronze.
Everyone is happy for the good results, but for me I am most happy for our teacher. We're not a 'shiai dojo' - I think we're a dojo that takes kendo seriously but we do not take ourselves seriously. But perhaps this ethos was becoming lost. So a few months back he told us that he would only go to the competition with people who represented the club and its values - even if the team was him and 4 beginners. The fact that so many people took up his challenge and changed their attitude - and I include myself in this category - is both a testament to his vision and to what can be accomplished when everyone is looking in the same direction.
It was a great weekend - as the length of this post shows - and we had lots of beers on the way home.
I go to work, but I don't have work on my mind. It's a long day waiting for kendo in the evening.
I turn up late! Everyone is already in seiza and I am embarrassed to take the sempai position when I have not got my armour on. However, it doesn't seem to matter. My teahcer is grinning.
He introduces someone who is sitting on his right as the person who supported him when he started teaching and who gave the club his spirit. It was a reminder that we have many, many people to thank when we practice kendo - not just old masters. He also introduces us to another person who pioneered kendo in the area before he moved to a different town. It is a pretty powerful way to start the course.
Then a photographer from the local paper turns up and we all grin foolishly as he snaps are photos. Finally we start the course.
During ji-geiko I am reminded by my teacher of the importance of going forward into strikes. I try to thank him for all his patience by going for a nice big tsuki. But I miss. Actually, given the fact that his sternum is currently held together by sellotape this is probably a good thing.
Afterwards we crack open the champagne - again - and it's almost midnight before we leave.
On the way home I feel somewhat sad. It's time to put the weekend to one side and keep on with the training.
Day 422: Tuesday, November 29-05
It is strange doing suburi again, but I whistle through them. A good set, looking forward, not back.
Day 423: Wednesday, November 30-05
The last day of November. Next weekend I have a weekend off, then more training and my exam. Time to put the head down and get on with it. I am so looking forward to Christmas!