unlikely superhero.
i'm on my knees in a pool of your blood. was this for hate or was it for love. i asked this question a million times in my mind. a question that can't be answered with time. my hands are drenched with blood and sweat. a few seconds of my life i could never forget. a promise we both made when we first found out. when life was filled with nothing we will ever know about. tears escape from my eyes as i soak up whats left of you. as my heart feels like it's been ripped from my chest i have nothing left to do. i knew you were in pain since that very first day. and this is the only thing i could do to take the pain away. i reached for the handle of that knife. the very same one that took away your life. the very same one i put in your chest moments before. once i pull it out from your chest i will cry even more. i now know you will never come back to me. i now know you are happier than you would ever be. you wouldn't have had a smile on your face once i killed you today. you would still be in a pain you couldn't dream yourself away. with a blood pact i kept the promise we both made. because i know in my heart if you i was in your position you would have done the same.
shooting stars.
as i gaze up into the never ending sky i try to find a reason to move forward. i look toward the disillusions of my mind to find the reasons why i am being held behind. as the only true thing that i lack is someone to motivate me. to see me believe in the one person that needs to believe and that is me. how can i believe in a world that is all around when i always feel down. when i look at the distrust and hate and feel like this is the only way it will be. i can't look toward the future and think maybe one day we will be together. when i can't even look forward to the next day with a smile when waking up is so hard to do alone. i need to realize that everytime i look toward you and look away i fall apart inside and there is only so much more left of me that is willing to hold myself together. that if i look away one more time it will be too late to do anything at all. i feel like my life is fading away because i don't ever have the guts to try anything. to make a fool of myself for the sake of being happy for one second of this so called life of mine. as i once again glance up into the heavens above i see shooting stars pass by. i keep quiet for a second and realize instead of just looking at these shooting stars i should of made a wish. because i know in my heart you are the only shooting star wish that i want to come true. but how can a wish come true if you don't have the guts to make that wish. i hate living with social anxiety disorder. for me the words that i want to say will never be said. and my life will pass me by so fast and end up fading away just like those shooting stars.
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