a lifetime in one night.
late last night, as i walked my life into truth. and as i walked i thought. the darkness in my head was darker then the night, last night. the trail on the street lead nowhere. and as my life flashed before my eyes, it seemed to be. 1:32am left me with a new thought. a new beginning. a new way to think my life needed a new change. it became more clear as i stepped into a puddle and my vans got all wet. drenched with apathy and soaked with memories. dreams that never came true. and pieces of the puzzle that i lost. never to regain and never to finish. seperated from the growing realization of happiness that i once knew. i once called upon. i knew it was still there lurking behind the shadows. 4:52am and i'm still walking. thought after thought. dream after dream. simple as that you may think. but so much more. it could of made me into something i always wanted to be. maybe or maybe not. i had to see it for myself. i had to make up my own rules. make my life worth living. so when i'm old, about to die. i can look back at my life and say "now thats a great life that i lived". i could be happy once again. and now at the end of the line. when my watch struck 6:29am, the sun flashed in my eyes. a light beamed over the rooftops. and it dawned on me. my life has just begun and tomorrow isn't just another day. it's the start of something new.
entertainment value.
and did i mention, how sick we are. how disgusting. how violent we really are. we are the most fucked up people in the world. just look around. actually just look at the idiot box in front of you. we can't help it. we all need help. we love death, destruction, carnage. we love to see people suffer. we love it so much we make television shows about it. we love to see cars crash. people being beating to death. animals killing people. anything thats cruel. we'll find a way to exploit it. for you know. a few extra bucks. when animals attack, the most dangerous car crashes. every show people are getting hurt. people almost dying. cars blowing up. nobody dying of course. you know because kids might be watching. how sick can we get. we can't turn away from car crashes. how many people can say when they past an accident they didn't look. not many. hardly anybody. we love to see it. and the next day at work or school. we share. hey, did you see that car wreck yesterday. damn, wasn't that cool. did you see the body. it was totally sick. the drivers head was on the otherside of the road. it was awesome. i hope i can see it again. to us life is the war. you say we're winning. i say we lost years ago.
dead hero's.
they say we need another. one more to save the day. helping the innocent bystandards to fight back against evil. chaos runs the world. we need someone to set us free. evil beware. evil has no power against our hero's. here he comes to save the day. here comes our last hope. our man made superman. we're brought up to believe his our only savior. hope is on the horizon. as we see him in the corner of our eye. he steps through the clouds of smoke. the lightings and the sounds are perfect. with evil dead. our hero stands above withour american flag blowing in the wind in the background. as he comes close from the distant. we stand and cheer. praise in hand. proud to be an american. he's in the paper. he's on the news. he saw tragedy. he made it disappear. statue's made in his honor. speeches made in his name. a name of a street is made in his heroic accomplishments. a made for t.v. movie done by out of work actors. a song done by out of work musicians. a key to the world given by the president. making good. help an elderly cross the street. kiss a baby. help the sick. spread hope for tomorrow. a better day to look forward to or until a new hero comes along. hero's die off everyday. we don't need another one to say everything will be just fine.
pathetic excuses.
tragic explanation to your otherwise tragic life. or is it worse off when you thought it was right. when you believed all the lies everyone was telling you. how could you do what everyone else wanted you to do. you let the wrong reasons tell you what is right. you let your apathy want to fight. for your new famed popularity. when your ego became a starting role.. your fame and fortune was everything to you and your conscience was sold, to the highest bidder, so it made your ego bigger and bigger. until the virus spreads through your viens. changing your image, covering your pain. not taking it away. but hiding where you believe it will stay. tell me how can you stand up when you lost your will. how can you live up to what you think is real. when your will to be yourself, if it means being by yourself. how can you look yourself in the mirror. when your face is distorted. and your life doesn't come in clear. but you seek comfort in money and your popularity. when you're feeling doubts, how can you stand tall, when you have no idea what life is all about. when you're afraid, when you're scared to say. how can you live for tomorrow, when you can't live for today. |
