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| The Bearded Population |
| by DeLorean McFly |
| The styles. The colors. Beards used to be a symbol of distinction and regality within most European societies. This also rings true with early settlers of the U.S. and Canada. Not onldy does the hair on one's chin and neck relate religious beliefs, it showed rank in many cultures. But where, may I ask, have all the beards gone? It went back farther in time than the ancient Egyptians, but now -- it's hard to find anyone with one. "There are two kinds of people who go around beardless - boys, and women, and I am neither one." -- A Greek saying. By definition, a beard is the hair growing on a chin, neck, cheeks and above the upper lip. Beards are generally associated with men, but female beard growth is often either hirstuism - a hormonal imbalance - or dark body hair appearing to be a moustache. The history of the beard can be traced back to the ancient Egyptians. They found them distasteful and unattractive. Eastern nations cultivated their beards with great care and their form of punishment for adultery was to cut the offending party's beard off. The Romans grew theirs long when in mourning, while their counterparts -- the Greeks -- shaved them off. In other cultures, people were not allowed to shave their beards until they had killed an enemy, swore by their beards or even wore ornaments in them. 15th Century -- The beard was grown long. 16th Century -- The beard was grown very long. 1920's - 1960's -- Beards were a social no. DELOREAN COMMENTS ON BEARD STYLES The Chin Strap - This is a beard that has long sideburns that come forward to end under the chin. Personally, I think you could just put a piece of duct tape there and be done with it. Full - A free-flowing beard, probably the most common. I'd recommend against kissing someone with one, you never know what's hiding under there. Garibaldi - Much like a full beard, but with a rounded off bottom. Don't kiss them, especially if you know they're both a sloppy eater and a lover of mashed potatoes. Goatee - A small tuft of hair on the chin. Lot's of people seem to have one. They're weird -- the beards, not the people. Well, actually, both. Royale - A small tuft of hair directly under the lower lip. Ew. Van Dyck - A goatee/moustache set. Verdi - A short, rounded beard with a very prominent moustache and shaven cheeks. How long does it take to groom this one? I mean, seriously. |
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