REDEMPTION
Part 10/13
Disclaimer: see part one. :-)
Tom and Chakotay entered Tom's quarters to get a few supplies for Tom's stay at Chakotay's.
"I just have to grab a few things in the bedroom Cha, then we can go." Tom said as he walked into the bedroom. Tom suddenly came to a dead stop as his gaze swept across the room.
Chakotay looked over at Tom wondering why he had stopped, then he noticed that the younger man was starting to shake. "Tom?" he asked hesitantly.
Tom felt dazed. All the feelings from that awful day came rushing back, he remembered entering the room, getting the dagger, everything. He started to tremble harder and felt his knees give way.
Chakotay watched in shock as Tom feel to his knees on the floor. Racing over to him he knelt beside him.
Tom let loose and agonizing howl of despair. Bringing his hands up to cover his face he started to chant, "What did I do? What did I do?"
Chakotay wrapped his arms around the younger man pulling him close. He made a quick survey of the room to see what had upset his lover. The blood and the dagger were gone, and the room was immaculately clean. Chakotay made a quick mental note to thank Harry later for cleaning up. Turning his thoughts back to his upset lover Chakotay asked, "What is it Tom, please tell me."
Tom turned around in the embrace and buried his head in the older man's chest, so he would not have to look at the room any longer. "This is where it happened," Tom replied between sobs.
Chakotay began to rub a hand over Tom's back in a comforting manner while whispering in his ear, "Shh Tom, it's alright."
Chakotay and Tom continued to kneel on the floor for a while, Tom in Chakotay's embrace, while Chakotay waited patiently for Tom to explain why he was so upset.
"I'm sorry," Tom began, "walking into the room brought back all the awful memories of that day."
Chakotay kicked himself mentally, he never thought that returning to the �scene of the crime' would be so upsetting to Tom. "I'm sorry too baby, I should never have brought you here."
"No, don't be sorry, their my quarters, I would eventually have to come and face all the demons in this room anyway."
"True," Chakotay murmured back as he continued to hold Tom, "let's just get your things and go, we can come back and deal with the room later. Maybe we can do a cleansing ritual to clean the negative aura from the room.
Sighing Tom nodded his agreement then broke away from the embrace. Offering his hand to Chakotay, they stood up together and went in search of Tom's things.
When everything was collected they moved towards the doors to leave. Turning one more time to look at the bedroom Tom repressed a shudder. *To think I almost ended it all in there,* he thought to him self grimly.
Clutching Chakotay's hand tighter they left Tom's quarters. Tom smiled slightly when Chakotay squeezed his hand reassuringly.
The short trip to Chakotay's quarters were uneventful. Thankfully they didn't run into any of the crew.
Breathing a sigh of relief when the door closed, Tom let go of Chakotay's hand and flopped on the couch. Chakotay took Tom's things into the bedroom and returned to sit beside Tom. "Are you hungry?" he asked.
Tom nodded.
Chakotay rose from the couch dragging Tom with him to the replicator, "What do you want?"
"Umm.......Pizza," he said with a grin.
"Alright," the Commander agreed, "as long as it's vegetarian."
Tom nodded, practically drooling at the smell of the pizza when it materialized.
The two grinning men walked over to the table and sat down, both starving and ready to eat.
Both men ate quietly, remembering the last meal they shared together at this table.
Reaching across the table Chakotay picked up one of Tom's hands and squeezed it lightly.
Looking up from his supper Tom grinned fondly at his lover. "I want to thank you for all you've done for me Chakotay." Tom started. "I really, really appreciate it."
Chakotay smiled brightly his dimples coming to light, he tried to wave away the thanks.
Tom caught his breath at the dazzling smile, "No, I really mean it, you've been there for me like no one else has."
Chakotay brought the hand he was holding to his lips, lightly kissing it he said, "You're welcome."
Tom's grin fell a little bit, "I still don't know how I deserve you." he said sadly, "but I'm glad your here."
Chakotay was saddened to hear his lover talk this way. "Don't worry Tom, you'll figure it out."
Tom smiled but made no reply.
After supper both men retired to the couch. Chakotay sat first drawing Tom to him. Tom leaned against the Commander as Chakotay wrapped his arms around him.
Tom sat for a while just content to be held.
"Chakotay?" he asked.
"Yes?"
"I love you."
Chakotay's heart leapt. It was the first time Tom had ever said he loved him. Placing a kiss on the top of Tom's head he replied, "I love you too."
Tom snuggled deeper into Chakotay feeling the warmth of his body along his back.
Both men knew that nothing else was going to happen tonight, that Tom was still to fragile for more than cuddling. But both were content just to sit there and be in each other's presence.
Chakotay broke the spell when he noticed Tom yawning. "Come on, lets go to bed," he said.
Tom reluctantly rose up from the couch, away from the comforting warmth of the Commander's body. Holding out a hand to Chakotay he helped him rise from the couch.
Hand in hand they entered the bedroom and prepared for bed. Tom slowly started to undress. Chakotay watched the way his muscles played in the soft light and sighed as Tom slipped into a pair of sleeping shorts.
Chakotay usually slept nude, but tonight he also wore a pair of shorts hoping that he could keep his hormones under control.
Lifting the covers Chakotay slipped into bed and smiled faintly when he felt Tom's weight settle beside him. Reaching over he pulled Tom closer to him. Placing his lips over the pilot's he gave him a long kiss good night. Chakotay broke away when Tom tried to turn the kiss into something deeper. Looking pointedly at Tom he grinned.
Tom grinned back apologetically, snuggling in deeper he said, "night Cha."
"Goodnight Tom."
Deeply content for the moment both men fell asleep quickly.
*****************************
Chakotay woke to find Tom struggling in his arms again.
"No." Tom whimpered.
Chakotay fought with himself, deciding whether or not to wake the younger man, remembering what happened last time he woke Tom from a nightmare.
Tom bolted awake with a scream taking that decision away from Chakotay.
Tom sat shivering in the bed, not remembering where he was for a moment. Then he felt the presence beside him. Panicking slightly he looked beside him. All he saw was Chakotay with a concerned expression on his face. Choking back a sob he launched himself at the Commander, throwing his arms around him.
"Hold me?" Tom asked shivering.
Chakotay quickly wrapped his arms around the younger man, pulling him close. Chakotay was at a loss at what to do, should he ask what was wrong and anger Tom like the last time, or should he wait for Tom to talk to him. Chakotay held Tom closer and started a soothing rocking motion. Deciding that he should try to get the younger man to talk he asked the obvious, "Nightmare?"
Tom nodded.
"Do you want to talk about it?" the Commander asked concerned.
Tom took a deep breath while deciding wether or not to tell him. He decided he should, "It was about prison."
Chakotay continued to rock Tom, encouraging him to continue.
"I...I was cornered and had no where to run," he began. "And the other prisoners started to come towards me. I didn't know what to do."
"It's ok, you're safe," Chakotay said comfortingly.
"I was so scared, then they started to hurt me."
Chakotay took Tom's face in his hands, "We're you hurt in prison?" he asked concerned.
Tom tensed for a moment, he did not like the way this conversation was going. It was to early to let Chakotay know about the rape. First he wanted to test the waters with less painful memories, to see how the Commander handled it. Looking deep into Chakotay's eyes he responded, "Oh just the usual prison fights, nothing to serious."
Chakotay thought he saw something deep in Tom's eyes, some sort of lingering pain, but chose not to pursue it. The fact that Tom was talking to him about his time in prison was enough for the moment.
Tom looked away from Chakotay, "I had stopped getting nightmares until I spent that time in the brig, then they came back with a vengeance."
"Is that why you were taking the sleep aid?" Chakotay asked.
Tom nodded sadly, "Yeah, I didn't have nightmares with them."
Both men let go the fact that the alcohol Tom was ingesting also played a factor in it, but that was a topic for another time.
Changing the topic Chakotay said, "When I visited the Captain earlier she told me to say hi for her."
"She did?" Tom asked surprised. He still felt that she hated him.
Chakotay reached up and stroked a tear stained cheek, "Yes she did. She doesn't hate you, you know. She feels guilty about this whole situation"
Tom was even more shocked, "Guilty? How?"
"She thinks that by placing you in the brig she broke your spirit."
Tom thought about that for a moment, It was true that being in the brig started this whole downfall, but the feelings behind it were always there. It was only a matter of time before it all blew up in his face. Tom felt a little bit of peace at this revelation, maybe the Captain didn't hate him after all. Looking back at Chakotay he said, "It wasn't her fault, I think that this would have happened eventually anyway, I was running from my pain instead of facing it."
Chakotay gazed in wonder at his lover, he did not think that he would get a statement from Tom like this. "Tom this is a great first step, admitting you have to face your past."
Tom smiled tentatively, "there's still a long way to go Big Man."
Chakotay leaned over and kissed Tom deeply, breaking off the kiss as he stroked his cheek, "yes there is, and I will be with you every step of the way."
Tom brought his hand up to cover Chakotay's, leaning over his initiated the kiss this time. Both men luxuriated in the feeling. Moaning slightly Tom opened his mouth and let Chakotay's tongue in.
Chakotay groaned as their kiss deepened. His tongue moving a heated path in Tom's mouth. A familiar hardness starting to form between his legs.
The two men continued to kiss for what felt like hours, until they had to break apart gasping for air.
Looking down ruefully Chakotay said, "I think I need a cold shower."
Tom chuckled and replied, "I promise to keep my hands to myself. Just hold me until I fall asleep again."
Chakotay kissed Tom again, "I think I can arrange that," he said.
Snuggling down under the covers Chakotay pulled Tom closer to him, praying that his semi-erection would soon go away. He couldn't wait till his lover was feeling better, he was planning on the time he would be able to make love to him all through the night.
Sighing with a bit of regret Tom snuggled closer to Chakotay, the warmth of his body a comforting presence. Closing his eyes he waited for sleep to come take him, hoping that he would not have another nightmare.
Chakotay lay holding his young lover until Tom's breathing evened out and he fell asleep, only then did he allow himself to sleep as well.
**********************************************
Tom and Chakotay woke up groaning to the sound of the alarm.
"Computer, turn off the alarm," the Commander barked.
Tom moaned and pulled the covers over his head, "I don't want to get up," he whined.
Chakotay looked at the cloth covered bundle beside him and smiled. Getting out of the bed he ripped the covers off Tom.
Tom yelped as the cold air hit his skin, "What the fuck!" he yelled as he snatched the blankets back.
Chakotay leaned over his sleepy lover and kissed his rumpled hair, "Time to rise and shine sunshine."
Tom threw a look of disgust in Chakotay's direction, "You are an evil, evil man," he said wrapping the blankets around himself.
"Well, I was going to start the shower for you, making it nice and hot, but now I don't know if I should, you've just insulted me after all."
Tom's eyes lite up at the mention of a hot shower, "Can you please still start it?" he begged.
"I don't know," Chakotay replied trying to look serious, "I think I need some sort of payment now."
"Will you do it for a kiss?" Tom asked.
"Just one? No way, not enough."
"Ok," Tom began slowly, "How about two kisses now, and two when I get out of the shower."
Chakotay looked like he was thinking for a moment, "Ok I suppose I can be persuaded with four kisses. Pay up mister."
Tom stepped out of the bed and walked over to Chakotay, wrapping his arms around his neck he pulled him closer and placed his lips over his. Giving him two quick pecks he broke the embrace and ran to the bathroom.
"Hey," Chakotay cried, "they weren't good enough, get back here."
Tom poked his head out of the bathroom and stuck out his tongue, "you didn't say what kind of kisses. Maybe they'll be better ones if this shower warms me up." With that Tom locked the door.
Chakotay looked solemnly at the looked door, he really wanted his kisses now. Slipping on a bathrobe he went over to the replicator and ordered some coffee. Chakotay was secretly elated at Tom's teasing mood, *He must be feeling better,* he thought as he sat down. Chakotay could hear Tom singing to himself in the shower, *yep, he's definitely feeling better.*
Chakotay continued to sit and sip at his coffee, not hearing the bathroom door open. Tom slipped out and stalked towards Chakotay. Chakotay placed his cup down on the table while he stretched out a kink in his shoulder. Reaching for the cup he saw a pale hand sneak out of no where and grab his coffee. Startled Chakotay turned around to see Tom drinking his coffee, "Hey, that's mine. Replicate your own."
"But yours taste much better Big Man," Tom said grinning as he took another sip.
"That's it young man, first you refuse me my due kisses, then you steal my coffee. I think you need to be punished."
"Oh, hurt me Big Man," Tom purred.
"You're asking for it," Chakotay warned as he moved towards Tom.
Tom continued to drink Chak's coffee as he backed away from the older man. Backing into the bedroom his legs hit the bed. Falling to a sitting position Chakotay took the coffee away and placed it on the night table. Then he reached out and placed one hand on Tom's shoulder, slightly pushing him.
Tom fell backwards on the bed and Chakotay took the advantage to straddle him.
"You are my prisoner now Tom, what'cha going to do about it?"
Tom smiled mischievously, and reached out towards Chakotay's groin.
Chakotay caught both of Tom's hands with one grasp, pinning them above Tom's head. "I don't think so," Chakotay whispered in Tom's ear as he nipped along the lobe. "I do believe I am due two kisses." Chakotay leaned down and placed his lips over Tom's, forcing them open. Tom thrust his tongue in Chakotay's mouth before Chakotay could reciprocate. They continued to kiss passionately before Chakotay tore his head away. "That's one," he said before leaning in for another kiss, this time taking control. He nipped along Tom's lower lip, making Tom moan slightly.
Breaking away from the heated kiss Chakotay said with a moan, "We shouldn't do this right now."
"I know," Tom panted slightly as he kissed Chakotay's face lightly.
"I really, really think we need to stop now," Chakotay groaned as Tom moved to nip at his neck.
Tom pulled away from nuzzling Chakotay's neck. "I know we do, it's to early," Tom replied regretfully. "I think you should go take your shower now."
Chakotay looked down at Tom with regret, leaning down he placed his forehead on Tom's, "We'll be able to do more soon, I promise."
Tom lifted Chakotay's head in his hands, "I'm holding you to that promise Big Man." Tom said kissing Chakotay once more, then slapping him hard on the ass he said, "now get off of me and get your butt in the shower."
Chakotay yelped at Tom's swat. Rubbing his ass slightly he got off of Tom and went into the bathroom. Closing the door he leaned against it thinking, *I'm so horny. Time for a long and very cold shower.*
Sighing as he stepped into the shower Chakotay looked down at his erection. *Well, there's no way that's going to go away on it's own,* he thought as he took his dick in hand. Leaning against the shower wall for support he started to move his grip up and down the length of his swollen member. Chakotay gasped as his knees weakened with the pleasure of it, wishing it was Tom doing it to him. Chakotay let his imagination run away with him. He pictured what it would be like to fuck Tom. Would he gasped as he entered him, or would he moan. Excited, Chakotay speed up the pace on his cock, groaning in pleasure at the pressure on his dick. Dipping one hand lower to fondle his balls, he gasped as his orgasm crept closer and closer. With a muffled shout joy Chakotay shuddered at his release, coming and coming till he was dryly ejaculating. Sighing with contentment Chakotay stepped under the stream of water to finish his shower.
**************************************
Tom lay panting shallowly on the bed. Chakotay's earlier ministrations had left him hot and hard. Reaching down he started to rub his hard shaft though the thin cloth of his shorts. Sighing with pleasure Tom lifted his rear off the bed and slipped his shorts off. Reaching down he grasped his hard cock and began to stroke it slightly. Tom quickly stepped up the pace and arched his back with pleasure, he was so close already. He wished desperately that it was Chakotay causing him this pleasure, but he knew that they had to wait till he was stronger. Tom quickened the pace again and increased the friction on his cock to a rate that always got him off. Softly crying Chakotay's name Tom exploded all over his hand and chest. Tom laid still for a moment basking in the glory of his orgasm. Getting up from the bed he grabbed a towel and quickly cleaned himself off. Pulling his shorts back on he threw the towel in the fresher and walked over to the replicator. Ordering some breakfast he waited for Chakotay to finish his shower. Tom smiled slightly when he heard a muffled groan emanating from the bathroom, *I bet I know what he is doing,* Tom thought with a grin.
Chakotay came out of the bathroom wearing a robe and a content smile. Sitting across the table from Tom he grabbed a piece of Tom's toast off his plate. Chakotay sniffed the air and smiled slightly when he smelled Tom's scent.
Blushing both men began to laugh at each other and their secret releases.
"So, did you enjoy your shower?" Tom asked wagging his eyebrows suggestively.
"Yes I did." Chakotay replied smiling, "Did you enjoy your time alone?"
"Oh very much," Tom laughed.
Tom and Chakotay reached out at the same time and clasped each others hands. Blushing for a while more they continued to eat and enjoy their time together.
to be continued.......
Liked it? Hated it? E-Mail comments to Beth at [email protected]
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