WHYS, WHERES AND WHAT IFS

WHY DO WE PRESS HARDER ON THE REMOTE CONTROL WHEN WE KNOW THE BATTERIES ARE LOW?

WHY DO FAT CHANCE AND SLIM CHANCE MEAN THE SAME THING?

IF LAW SCHOOL IS SO HARD TO GET THROUGH.......WHY ARE THERE SO MANY LAWYERS?

WHY DO THEY CALL IT A SHIPMENT IF IT'S TRANSPORTED BY CAR.....AND A CARGO IF IT'S TRANSPORTED BY SHIP?????

WHY DO WE PARK ON DRIVEWAYS AND DRIVE ON PARKWAYS?

WHY DOES YOUR NOSE "RUN" AND YOUR FEET "SMELL"?

WHY DOES YOUR ALARM CLOCK "GO OFF" WHEN IT STARTS TO RING?

WHY ARE THEY CALLED STANDS IF THEY'RE MADE FOR SITTING?

WHY DOES "JINGLE BELLS BATMAN SMELLS" COME TO MIND BEFORE THE REAL SONG AT CHRISTMAS TIME?

IF A FLY HAD NO WINGS WOULD IT BE CALLED A WALK?

IF A TRAIN STATION IS WHERE A TRAIN STOPS, WHAT IS A WORK STATION?

WHY IS IT WHEN WE ARE DRIVING AROUND, LOOKING FOR AN ADDERESS, WE TURN DOWN THE RADIO?

IF FED EX AND U.P.S. WERE TO MERGE, WOULD THEY BE CALLED FED-UP?

IF QUITTERS NEVER WIN, AND WINNERS NEVER QUIT,
WHAT FOOL CAME UP WITH, "QUIT WHILE YOU'RE AHEAD"?

WHAT HAIR COLOR DO THEY PUT ON THE DRIVER'S LICENSES OF BALD MEN?

MANY MOTHERS FEED THEIR SMALL CHILDREN WITH TINY SPOONS AND FORKS,
DO CHINESE MOTHERS USE TOOTHPICKS?

WHY DO THEY PUT PICTURES OF CRIMINALS UP IN THE POST OFFICE?
ARE WE SUPPOSED TO WRITE TO THESE MEN?
WHY DON'T THEY JUST PUT THEIR PICTURES ON POSTAGE STAMPS SO THE MAILMEN COULD LOOK FOR THEM WHILE THEY DELIVERED THE MAIL?

HOW MUCH DEEPER WOULD OCEANS BE IF SPONGES DIDN'T LIVE THERE?

IF A MAN SAYS SOMETHING IN THE WOODS AND THERE ARE NO WOMEN THERE,
IS HE STILL WRONG?

WHAT WOULD THE SPEED OF LIGHTNING BE IF IT DIDN'T ZIG ZAG?

WHAT'S THE SPEED OF DARK?

WHY DO THEY STERILIZE THE NEEDLES USED IN LETHAL INJECTIONS?

WHO'S CRUEL IDEA WAS IT TO USE AN "S" IN THE WORD LISP?

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