Chapter Four
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JC was waiting for Justin outside Johnny's office when he came out.  "You ready, J?" he said as he stood up, trying to read Justin's face.

"I'm more than ready.  I wish I was old enough to drink, cuz I could use one.  Got any beer at your place, C?" Justin asked.

"Don't even go there.  Drinking is NOT how you should be dealing with the nightmares or missing Britney," JC replied sternly.  He'd been there a million times himself.

Justin stopped walking and turned around, leveling his icy blue stare right at JC.  "Would you get a grip, JC?  You've let me drink your beer before, you know.  If I really wanted it, I could surely find someone to get it for me if it's too much trouble for you!  I wasn't really serious anyway."

Justin turned away and started walking out to JC's car.  JC ran up to walk alongside Justin, though it wasn't easy with Justin's longer strides.  JC could tell he was pouting.  "Oh, stop poutin', man!  Jeez!  I've never seen a grown man who pouts more than you do.  Look at your lip! If you aren't careful, you're going to trip, not only yourself, but me as well!"

With that said, JC jumped in front of him with his arms up to fight.  Justin couldn't help himself and started laughing at JC's attempts to lighten him up.  As he continued walking though, he straight-armed JC right in the chest, sending him ricocheting to the side, coughing and doubled over.

"Shit, Justin.  That knocked the wind out of me!" he gasped.

Justin stopped to look down at him and simply said, "Wimp," before smirking at JC and continuing on to the car.

"You should really be nicer to your elders!" JC yelled after him.

Once he recovered, JC joined Justin and they drove to Justin's house in silence.  Justin didn't seem mad, just lost in his thoughts.  As they pulled into Justin's driveway, he looked at JC with a smile, "Sorry for punching you back there.  I didn't mean to hurt your old feeble bones. Thanks for giving me a ride."

He paused a few moments and continued, "Johnny's going to hook me up with someone to talk about things.  I think I need to get it under control before June if I'm going to tour with you guys.  It'd be too bad if you had to change everything to just say "SYNC".  Plus you need me there to keep it cool," he said, laughing.

JC chuckled at Justin's little joke and slapped at the back of his head.  "You are so arrogant.  Get outta my car!"  Justin climbed out and disappeared into the house, while JC turned for home.

Once Justin was in the house, he checked the answering machine for a message from Britney, finding none.  He frowned and he wondered what she was up to.  She'd always been independent, so he wasn't surprised.  He did want to continue the conversation she'd ended abruptly that afternoon.  Calling her tonight wasn't an option though.  He knew she was working, which she did most nights until midnight or so.

It had been a week since he checked his email so he turned on his computer.  While waiting for it to boot up, he thumbed through his mail.  He smiled when he saw a card from his grandma in Tennessee.  It was a "thinking of you" card that his grandma was famous for.  He smiled, making a mental note to go see her soon.  She always gave him unconditional support and love, which he could use right now.

He signed on to AOL.  His mailbox was full, mostly of junk mail and a few messages from friends....but none from Britney.  He clicked on the chat icon.  Just for fun, sometimes he'd go into the *NSYNC chatrooms to see what crazy stuff was going on.  It was very funny, watching the girls arguing over who was the cutest.

There were 21 people in the room and some of them were commenting on one of *NSYNC's performances.  He didn't normally participate in the chats, but eavesdropping wasn't above him.  'MAN, SOMEONE JUST CALLED ME A FAG!' he said to himself.  Then he waited for all the *NSYNC fans to come to his defense, which inevitably several did.  It was like a tennis match.  After about a half hour, his stomach was growling so he signed off.

He kicked off his sneakers and went into the kitchen, returning to his sofa and coffee table with a bowl, milk, spoon and cereal box.  He laughed and shook his head, thinking, 'What a stud!  Sitting here alone, eating cereal!'  The guys had gone out dancing but Justin had begged off again.  He still liked to go out with the guys but he didn't like the big, crowded club they were heading for that night.  Plus, he didn't need the temptations the club scene always brought with it.  He'd had problems before and Britney wasn't the type of girl to forgive him forever.  Fighting off the women in the clubs wasn't all that appealing when there wasn't that element of possibility and danger.  And he wasn't about to screw things up with Britney.

His mind kept returning to the conversation with Johnny.  He hoped this therapist would help him get passed the panic he felt whenever he was around large groups of people, especially if the people were young women.  One or two were manageable.  Somewhere between two and 1/2 a million, Justin felt his palms start sweating.  Deep in thought, his telephone rang a few times before he jerked out of his reverie.

"WHAT??" he barked into the phone.

Johnny replied, "Were you asleep?"

Justin yawned, "Naw, sorry, man.  It's only 9:30!  What's up?"

Johnny said, "I've got that phone number for you and a time for you to meet with her.  Her name is Dr. Breana Gallagher and she can see you tomorrow night after 6 PM.  Just call her to finalize the time."

Justin's mind was whirling. "The therapist is a she?" he said quietly, while he searched for a pen and something to write on.  He wrote down the phone number and her name.

Johnny said, "Is that a problem?"

Justin thought for a moment and said, "I don't think so.  I just was thinking it'd be a guy, since, well...I'm a guy."  After a short pause, Justin said, "I'll call her office tomorrow.  Thanks, Johnny!"

After they hung up, Justin looked at the piece of paper in his hand.  He stretched his long legs out as he lay down on the sofa.  This therapy thing had to work; otherwise he didn't know what he'd do.  While the tour wasn't the most important thing at the moment, the  second the album was done, his life would be all about the tour.  He couldn't bear to think about meeting the fans and performing on stage if this didn't work.  Desperately, Justin tried to push the images out of his mind and concentrate on the basketball game he had on the television.  It wasn't long before his eyes closed and he was again running from screaming girls in his dreams.

* * * * * *

The next morning, Justin awoke with a start.  He squinted as he looked around the room.  He'd fallen asleep on the sofa again.  He quickly looked at his watch to make sure he wasn't late.  The telephone rang and he groaned as he reached to grab it.  "This is your friendly wake up call," sang into his ear as he recognized Melinda's voice.

"Oh, thanks, Melinda, I think.  What would I do without you?" he said into the phone, laying on a thick southern accent he only used when he needed a favor.

Melinda said, "Ok, Justin, what do you want?  Whenever you use that sweet drawl, I know it's going to be followed by a request."

"Melinda, I know how you love to do stuff for us.  I do need a favor.  I'm going to be busy with charity stuff today.  All I need is for you to call this number I'll give you and set up an appointment for me for after 6 PM tonight.  That's it.  Could you do that for me, pleeeease?" he asked, dripping every syllable with Tennessee honey.  "Pleeeeease?"

Melinda replied, "And why can't you do it, Mister?  I know for a fact that your charity thing today will only take 2 or 3 hours.  I think you can manage a simple phone call.  You are not too grown up or too famous for me to teach you how to run your own life.  You could call right now if you hang up and dial the numbers."

Justin teased, "Are you shooting me down, Chicken?  I can't believe you just said no to me," and then he laughed.

Melinda was like a big sister to all of the *NSYNC guys and couldn't fall for their ploys.  She chuckled and said, "Always, baby.  I'm immune to all you have to offer."

Justin said, with a loud sigh, trying to sound as pitiful as he could, "Ok, Melinda.  I get your message.  I'll call myself.  Remind me to get my own personal 'beck and call' girl, ok?"

Melinda said, "I wouldn't use that title in her position description, if I were you.  Are you up?  If so, I've got lots of important things to do that don't include chatting up boyband members."

Justin thanked her before hanging up and shoved the paper in his coat pocket.  He had hoped to avoid having to call himself.  Asking for an appointment to see a shrink damaged his pride a little, but he sighed in resignation as he ran upstairs to get ready for the day.  He just hoped he didn't fall asleep in the shower.  He'd put in a very restless night again, running from the mobs.  This time they all looked like Mandy Moore, which made him wonder why the hell he was even running.

About an hour later, he pulled into Johnny's driveway.  The other guys were already there, mulling around the van.  It was easier for security to keep track of everyone if they went together, so they always piled in one van with security following close behind.  As he parked, Chris ran up to his window, jumping up and down like a madman.

"He made it.  He's here!"  Chris yelled while still jumping up and down.  He loved to embarrass Justin and was very good at it.

Justin grabbed his coat and got out, only to have Chris jump on his back like he wanted to ride him piggyback.  "Get the hell off me, Chris!" he said while trying to pry Chris' arms off his neck and out of his hair.

Joey, Lance and JC were all laughing at the ruckus.  Chris and Justin had always rough-housed and competed against each other in everything from dancing to basketball.  The practical jokes that they played on each other often served as their only entertainment on the long tours around Europe and Japan.

Johnny came around the van, all business, saying, "Load up guys.  Justin, will you stop picking on Chris?" before stepping into the security van with Mike.

Chris let go and Justin elbowed him hard into his side before disappearing into the back of their van.  "You are dead meat, Timberlake!!" was all Chris could squeak out in response before Lonnie shoved him in to sit next to Lance.