I was being pressured from all sides by something� It told me to vote� It was Air - not your everyday air, mind you. This Air, aptly named Air, tried to impress upon me the importance of voting. He kept talking but I didn't really pay attention to it.
Eventually he stopped and asked. "Do you understand now?"
"Think about what?"
"�You haven't been listening to a word I've said, have you?"
I rolled my eyes. "Of course not!"
"You don't realize who I am. I am God and thou shalt cast my divine vote!"

Right around that time, I breathed God in - he smells a lot like cod-liver oil. It serves him right, though. I mean, that's a pretty stupid thing of a divinity to do. But I don't know why my voting was such a big deal to him� I mean, we were just voting for the science department's president� and the president is just a nickname we give to the next animal we're going to dissect. I was inspired to vote anyway.

The classes were released into the hallway where the animals were being displayed. We had choices from aardvarks to plains lions to kimono dragons to ducks� Roasted Peking Ducks to be exact. None of these really attracted my attention for long due to the fact that I had long since realized that all of the interesting animals were a pain to kill - we have to do that ourselves, by the way. All we get are a pair of gloves, a tazer, some cow venom, and a toothbrush (for good luck) since killing it is three fourths of our grade.

Well, back to the point. After walking around for a bit, I found the one that'd get my vote - the parrot! He's usually perched right above me in Biology and he likes to repeat the things I mutter to myself. "Man, I sure wish she'd shut up and let us burn stuff", "Woah, what is she doing?� Holy crap! What is she doing?!" and so on. So when time came to vote, I started writing down "Parrot" but Polly swooped down and bit my eye. I abruptly stood up and screamed at the top of my lungs, waving my arms frantically for effect. Once the class began to lose interest, I yanked out the parrot and, coincidentally, my eye. He spat it up my nostril and I felt it roll up to my eye socket slowly. So I let Polly go and I got a new ballot. This time I wrote "Clay Pigeon" along with an explanation about not voting for the parrot� mostly because I knew he wouldn't make a move against me.

So when time came for the winner to be announced, we were gathered in the auditorium and the envelope was opened. The head of the department announced, "Our new president is the Clay-Pigeon-I-was-going-to-vote-for-the-parrot-but-he-bit-me." Needless to say, the rest of the unit was smooth sailing.