1-2-3 Years...
Chapter Fourteen
Just as Abbie had said, it took Olivia a little time, but she did come around. In other words, she came out clean to Alex in every little detail that she thought was needed to be said. And just like Abbie had told her, Alex listened through it all. And now that Olivia's voice had stopped talking, an eerie silence took over demanding a reaction, a response from her.
But she had none.
She could have been happy that now she finally knew about Olivia's past or shocked by what she heard, or just saddened that Jena held a much larger piece of Olivia's heart than she had been prepared for. But the only thing Alex felt was suffocation, suffocation that needed to be remedied. So, she rushed out of Eve's room and found herself in the kitchen gulping down two drinks before she even took a breathing break.
The third drink remained in her hand as details of Olivia's words replayed in her mind as she let them all sink in and make sense.
"Jen and I were married."
"We wanted to have a baby."
"When Eve was born it was the happiest day of my life."
"When we broke up, Jen took Eve."
"Eve is my daughter."
Every key sentence of Olivia's confession made a fresher cut on her heart. Alex gulped down that drink too, and immediately poured another. She must have been on her sixth drink when Olivia interrupted her hand's path, causing the drink to splash on both of them.
"Alex please, say something." Olivia begged.
"What am I supposed to say?" She had swallowed down half a bottle but she still was awaiting its effect.
"I know I should have told you all this before, but it never felt like the right time. And with Jen and Eve settled in Washington I thought waiting for the right moment was a good decision."
"Eve was here. Right here with us." Alex pointed out unable to believe that Olivia hadn't found that to be the right moment.
"I know, but just when I thought I could tell, Jen called. She warned me not to tell Eve anything."
"But I wasn't Eve."
"No, you weren't but Jen was going to be here. I wasn't sure what kind of game Jen would play. You have to understand, when Jen gets it in her head to hurt someone, she would go to any extent, and that scared me."
"What did you think she would do?"
"I don't know....I didn't really think. I just thought she might come between us or something." Olivia took Alex's face in her hands to make another honest confession. "Somehow I thought I would loose you. That's what scared me, the most."
She leaned her face forward and allowed her forehead to rest on hers.
"Alex believe me, every stupid thing I did or didn't do, I did it only because I didn't want to loose you, and I didn't know how you would react to my past. To Eve...." Tears rolled out just as her words did.
"What did you think I would do?" It was Alex's turn to cry. "That I would say you were married and had a kid, so I don't love you anymore." She held Olivia's face a little away from hers and looked directly into her eyes. "I fell in love with you, way before I even got a chance to tell you or show you my love. And you thought our love was so fragile that I couldn't understand."
"I don't know...I don't know what I thought. All I knew was I didn't want to loose you. She had promised me that she would hurt me every chance she got, and when Ray said that she was still holding on to it. I mean we are talking about a woman who slept with a guy just so that she could hurt her ex girlfriend. I am not saying she did that to me, but I am saying that when she sets out to hurt someone she crosses every limit so I didn't know what she would do. And when we saw her in the hospital, I knew she hadn't changed. So, I thought if somehow someway, I could keep Jena away from you, from us. Things would somehow be okay. But then, I irrationally accused Ray, and Ray died. He was a friend, I owed it to him to bring Davis to justice, and with Eve being the only witness. Believe me, I did try and coax Jena into allowing Eve to be a witness, but that was the only reason why I went to ...."
Alex captured Olivia's lips before she could say or cry anymore. May be it was the drink that had finally got into her, but Alex didn't want or need to hear anymore. She believed every word Olivia was rambling. And now she wanted to make those tears to stop.
It took Olivia more than a second to realize what had stopped her words. It was Alex's lips on hers, nudging for her to open up. Even though she wanted to, but she felt she still had more to say, so she pulled away.
"Alex..."
"Shut up." She commanded huskily pulling her girlfriend to her lips.
"I love you." Olivia quickly said before the ADA's lips claimed hers.
The kiss was deeper than they had ever shared before. Alex probed deeper and deeper in the hope to prove the strength and understanding of her love, while Olivia opened up and sucked her harder, welcoming Alex back. They had cried talked and begged for too damn long that their exhausted emotions collapsed behind as their bodies took control, and they found their hands desperately searching any part of bare skin they could find.
Alex's one hand found Olivia's neck while the other tried to pull out her shirt tucked in her pants. While Olivia's both the hands were working to open the button of Alex's trousers. Both of them loosened the other's top at the same time. So they broke their kiss only for a fraction of a second to yank them off of themselves before continuing the kiss. At that particular moment they needed to feel the other internally at every passing second. So, regardless of how much attention their naked skin yearned for, it had to make do with their roaming hands since their tongues remained wrestling inside of each other.
Alex's trousers were the ones that came off first, but Olivia's were on the floor soon after. Olivia tried to break the kiss and make her way down, but Alex pulled her up. After couple of seconds, Alex tried to slip but Olivia didn't let her either. They stayed kissing and touching each other for couple more minutes till both their need between their legs throbbed for attention and their tongues sought a deeper taste. They broke the kiss and stared at each other.
They were naked. Their bodies were streamlined to each other. Physically the need was escalating. But neither woman was giving in. Because they were not out to make love, they were out to prove their love and they both wanted to prove it to the other. So they remained staring hoping the other would give them the chance to be the one to bestow. At that moment, Olivia found a middle ground, in between their bodies as her hand traveled down, between her legs and easily slipping inside her folds. Alex's hand followed an immediate suit and entered her lover's core right after. Their need to prove, their want to have, all cumulated between the two cores as each rocked rhythmically with the other. Both the women held on to each other and the kitchen counter where the half a bottle of whiskey and empty glass endured the preliminary quake before the volcano that erupted simultaneously on two of NYC's finest women.
Hours had slipped by as their initial wrestle for the need to prove had subsided into a subtle dance of love that they each performed for the other in the comfort of their bed. The room boasted of consummation of every aspect, from the scent to the taste had dissolved as beautifully as were the two women who remained wrapped up in their naked state.
Stamina was what had tapped out as they paused allowing each a breathing break. Olivia was the one lying on her back staring down at the blonde head that rested heavenly on her stomach. She had her hand embedded deep inside her silky hair, tracing circles on her scalp, while the former ADA followed the same pattern on the curls defining her womanhood.
"God I had missed this." Alex said inhaling the intoxicating vapor of the detective's pleasure.
"I know." The brunette agreed. "When I let you storm out of the precinct I knew that I had screwed up big time. What I didn't realize was that you would completely shut me out. And with Gina almost everywhere I wanted to see you, for a moment there, you sure gave me a heart attack."
"Oh well, don't blame G." Alex defended her friend. "She just got this mother syndrome going on for her."
"I don't think so. Did you see the grin on her face? I think she was enjoying the fact that I was in so much pain."
"You are just imagining it." Alex brushed the topic aside. "Talking about mother syndrome, tell me one thing." Alex got up and looked at her girlfriend. "Not that I am trying to judge you here." She decided to tread carefully. "I get the whole, things didn't work out and Jen and you broke up deal. But, you completely walked out on Eve too?"
"I didn't walk out, Jen did." Olivia confessed. Olivia took Alex's hand and held it before she continued. "Saying things were bad between us, is phrasing it lightly. On one particular night, we were both arguing and she was basically shoving all of Eve's responsibility on me, and that ticked me off, so much so that I ended up yelling at her that it was her daughter and she was the mother not me." Her hand kept a tight hold on her lover's hoping that her momentary misguided words would not fracture what was between them, just like it had once done to her already. "You have to believe me; I did not mean it to come out in that very way that it did. But, after that to Jen it was no turning back. She walked out with Eve. I tried to talk to her when she was here, and also followed them both to Washington. But she just refused to give me a chance. I begged her for us and for Eve, but then she warned me never even to think that Eve was my daughter again. As days turned into weeks, I was getting all ready to pursue legal avenues but then Ray came to me. He was the one who pointed out that with the way things were with us, the best thing for Eve was for one of us, to not be there. Because Jen sure wasn't going to make it pretty for anyone, not even for Eve if I was there. That�s when I promised him that I would walk away and never cause a commotion in Eve's life."
"While Jen thought the reason I did not fight for Eve, was because I was scared of getting �out�ed. She thinks that I chose my career over Eve. So, she sent me a letter saying that no matter, how sorry I might feel, she'll never forgive me."
"And Ray never told her about the real reason?" Alex asked.
"I don't know. I don't know if he did and she didn�t' believe him ...or he just plain fucking didn't tell her. I don't know. But he was a manipulative ass who always tired to stir some bullshit between Jen and me. I am not saying he wasn't a good friend. I mean he came through for us many a times. But sometimes he just ... I feel wished that he was in my shoes."
"In other words he liked Jena?" Alex summarized listening to Olivia's past like she was reading a juicy novel.
"He was in love with Jena."
"And the plot thickens." Alex mocked hoping to bring back the smile on her sweetheart's face.
"It does sound like a bad romance novel doesn't it?" Olivia allowed the mockery of her heart's tale.
"No, it doesn't. I was just trying to cheer you up. After all, everything is just a memory now."
"I know but.... you might hate me for this." Olivia who was lying on her back sat up. "I am going to break my promise to Ray."
Alex remained silent not quiet understanding the implication.
"The reason why Cyn was here today was because I wanted to know if there was anyway I could file for some custodial rights on Eve."
Alex once again remained silent.
"Ray had promised me that if nothing I would always be Eve's guardian. But now she took that away too. Not just that, she put a restriction order on me from Eve. I can't take that sitting down. She is my daughter." Olivia explained.
"So, does Cynthia think you have a case?" Alex asked after a long silence.
"She told me that most probably it won't even be heard. But if she manages to find a judge who will take it, it would also mean ...."
"A lot of publicity and press is going to follow every single minute of it. A gay woman asking for custodial or guardianship rights on her ex-partner's daughter can sell a lot of papers." Alex the lawyer knew the consequences too.
"That is why when you walked in she wanted to make sure that I was prepared for it and was completely sure if that is what I wanted to do." Olivia offered the explanation for what Alex had seen.
"And you said yes." Alex remembered Olivia's answer.
"I did. Jen thinks that we broke up, she won't drag you in, and I won't let her. Whatever happens due to this, I'll face it all. You don't have to be involved at all." Olivia hoped that Alex would not think that she was trying to out Alex or cause any kind of drama in former ADA's life.
"But I am involved. Don't you see?" Alex was surprised that Olivia thought she could stay out of it. "She is your daughter, how can I not be involved."
Olivia panicked. Their relationship had just been mended and now here she was straining it once again.
"And I want to be involved." Alex didn't share her views. She was thinking in a completely different angle. "In fact let me, be the one to fight this case for you."
Olivia couldn't believe her ears. She stared blankly unable to process what she just heard. "You want to take my case?"
"Yes. I want to give you, your daughter back." Alex held Olivia's face that once again had tears rolling down. "I can't promise you we will win, but if there is a way, I want to be the one to find it."
"Thank you." Olivia managed to only mouth the word before she hugged the woman whose love for her was overwhelming.
Alex hugged her back for dragging moment till, her libido kicked in. After all when you are naked in bed with a stunning woman as Olivia, how was she to remain un aroused for long.
"Of course there is a small matter of retainer." She refrained from smiling, as she pulled out of the hug.
"Retainer!" Olivia asked genuinely surprised, but only for a minute.
The moment she caught the lustful blue eyes, she knew exactly what kind of retainer her lawyer lover was talking about. She flipped Alex effortlessly so that it was the blonde who was lying on her back and she was on top of her. "I think I can manage to work out some retainer agreement with you. What exactly did you have in mind, counselor?"
"Along the line of what you are about to do, works out fine with me." Alex replied as she kept a narrow eye on the detective's fingers that were tracing its way down to the dotted spot to sign her retainer.