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12/31/04
Happy New Year DG Minna-san! Guess what I'm doing for new years? E-mailing you! Michelo-san, do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage and would you be willing to share any with Master Asia? (He needs some) What kind of teddy bear does Wong-san have? Does it have it's own floaty chair? Ulube-san have you ever gotten so drunk you woke up in someone else's bed? No questions for Master Asia. He woulnd't let me hug him. Love, The Emperor |
Dear "The Emperor",
Michelo: Share? With him? Yeah right! HAHAHAHAH! That's a good one! Wong: Teddy bear? Who told you that? If I did have one it wouldn't have a floaty chair. Only I can have one. >_><_< Ulube: Excuse me? I'm not going to answer that. It's really none of your business. Master Asia: I DON'T NEED A QUESTION! Especially from someone like you. BAH! Kyoji: Thank you for the letter, Emperor-san. |
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01/01/05
Emperor: *sighing* First off, my associate Shen has a few words for you... Shen: *bouncing up and down* HAPPY NEW YEAR! HAPPY NEW YEAR!! HAPPY NEW YEAR! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! *waves sparklers* Emperor: Gah! What did I tell you about lighting those INSIDE the house?!! Shen: *pauses* Hmm.... can't remember!! *bounces off* Emperor: ..... Yes.. well. Shen's been celebrating a little hard this year... *yells* I told you to stop at the pixie sticks! Shen: Emperor-chan, what's in these cans labeled Red Bull? Emperor: NO! DON'T TOUCH IT!! Shen: *pops the can open and chugs* Ooooo.... Me like...*giggles insanely* I'm gonna light some more sparklers! Emperor: *falls over* (Before Shen found the Red Bull, our question was: How much DO you guys spend reading and watching porn? Sure, I always figured Chibodee to be a perv' like that, but George? I'm appalled) Love, The Emperor & Shen |
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Dear "The Emperor" and Shen,
Kyoji: Porn? Well I don't read or watch porn. George reads porn? Are you sure about that Emperor-san? Ulube: What kind of question is that?! Honestly now, that's crossing the line! Wong: George watches porn? Hmmm... can't say I saw that one coming. I suppose it's always the ones you'd never suspect. Master Asia: WHAT'S THIS?! Porn? NEVER! I would never take part in reading or watching so lowly! What George does is his own business! BAH! Figures! PATHETIC! Michelo: He really looks at porn? HAHAHAH! Now I got blackmail material! HAHAHAHAHAH! |
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01/01/05
>.< Heh. Thanks Master Asia. Yeah, I do have a sad life, ne? .....WTF??! Did I just agree with you..? *hits head on keyboard* BAD KITSUNE!! Yeah.. I probably shoulda went out and found the ACTUALL Princess and Cecil....Then they could've both died.. Sorry. I'm a bit touchy at the moment. Thank you for your insult, Michelo. I appreciate it. bah.. Kitsune Orenjii, Neo-Norway News. |
Dear Kitsune Orenjii,
Master Asia: Of course I'm right! I'M MASTER ASIA! Kyoji: Well, it's probably a good thing you didn't use the real people, you would probably wind up in jail. Wong: Oh come on, it wouldn't have been a big loss. Jill, would have loved to hear that Cecil was exploded. Ulube: *cough* Uh, remember, we aren't suppose to be giving advice on doing "evil" things. It's against the rules. *cough*I would have gone for the real people*cough* Michelo: Heh! You're Welcome! Kyoji: *hits Michelo over the head* URUSAI! Michelo: �_� |
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01/08/05
Urube You know your sexy. When I said 'a bunch of 20's' I meant American dollars! You'd make a great stripper! Oh and here's your hat back! Adorably Yours Neko Navis/ Obsidian Angel ^.^* |
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Dear Neko Navis,
Ulube: Well Um... thank you... I think. As for the stripper thing, um... well... it's not a very uh... well... I'm sure there are other ways to make some money. Ah! My hat... thanks, I needed that back. |
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01/09/05
DG Guys, Sorry, but I'll have other questions for you later. This letter is devoted to Master Asia. Dear Master Asia, Do you have hemrhoids? Are you masking the sadness from Domon opening up a can of whoop-ass on you? Why don't you try changing your look? I suggest calling "Queer Eye For The Straight Guy". I'm sure they could help. Have you ever... Gone skinny-dipping? Out-drank Michelo-san and Chibodee? Mooned someone? Worn a thong on your head? That's all and I promise, Master Asia, if you answer these truthfully and let me hug you, I'll leave you alone and NEVER EVER SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN. Love always, The Emperor |
Dear "The Emperor",
Master Asia: WHAT IS THIS?! This is an outrage! Skinny Dipping? MOONING?! A new look? I don't need a new look. I LOOK FINE! HA! Domon? What a joke! Hemroids?! WHAT?! These questions are out of line! AND NO! I YOU CAN NOT HUG ME! |
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01/14/05
Dear DG, Poo. Kitsune Orenjii, Neo-Norway News |
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Dear Kitsune Orenjii,
Kyoji: Nani? O_o? I'm not the only one confused by this letter right? Wong: Yes, this is a bit odd. Poo? What is this suppose to mean? Michelo: Is it a joke? I'm not laughing. Ulube: Well, at least it's not an insult... or maybe it is. O_o? Master Asia: YOU ARE ALL MORONS! Can't you see that poo is exactly what this letter is. IT'S POO! |
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01/14/05
Dear Master Asia, You make me very sad. Since you didn't answer not even ONE of my questions and you didn't hug me, I shall continue writing you these long, boring, pointless e-mails. What do you say to that? Wong-san, is there any type of sweets you don't like? Urube-san, did you know your mask looks sort of like the Phantom's from Phantom Of The Opera? Michelo-san, what did you REALLY want to be when you grew up? Other than a mob-boss Gundam Fighter? Kyoji-san, keeki to pai to dochira ga suki desu ka? Watashi wa keeki ga daisuki desu! Love& Peace Out, The Emperor |
Dear "The Emperor",
Master Asia: Bah! Fine! Waste your time on these letters! YOU ARE A FOOL! Wong: Yes, those little things that look like gummi candies but they are actually fruit. Those are gross. Ulube: Does it now? I haven't heard that one before. Michelo: Simple... to make lots of money and rule the world. I will one day...you just watch. Kyoji: Hmmm...ano...muzukashi desu ne. Emperor-san, donna keeki ga suki desu ka? (Hmmm, that's a hard decision. Emperor, what kind of cake do you like?) |
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01/26/05
Dear Schwartz, What's it like being a Japanese-speaking, German ninja clone? I also think you are very cool. Love, The Emperor |
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Dear "The Emperor",
Kyoji: A letter for Schwartz? Um... >_><_< Well... let me get him for you. U__________U; Schwartz: *cough* Um, oh *cough* Well, you see, it's a long story. There isn't enough time or space to get into that here. You think I'm cool? Well thank you. It's nice to know I have fans. >_><_< *cough* |
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01/26/05
Dear Wong, Are you belimic or anorexic because for the amount of sweets you eat you should be fat and out of shape and yet you aren't. Please explain. Inquiring minds want to know, The Emperor |
Dear "The Emperor",
Wong: Ah, good question. No, no... I'm just fine. I work out when I have time. Also, I do eat other things beside sweets. A balanced diet helps even out the junk food. Hmmm, I suppose I should get back to the gym, I haven't done any exercise fore awhile. Need to work off the holiday weight gain. >_><_< *cough* I mean uh... >_><_<... Thank you for the letter. |
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01/28/05
Hey U-sama you know track 4 of Ashanti's 'Concrete Rose' Reminds me alot of you. It's just so sexy. Also what cologne do you wear? I'd like to know. Always Your's Neko Navis/ Obsidian Angel ^.^* |
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Dear Neko Navis,
Ulube: Sexy huh? Well I suppose I am, aren't I? Heh. Cologne? Hmmm it depends on how I'm feeling. I don't really like strong smells though. Anything light is just perfect. |
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01/28/05
DG Guys, I apologize for the last letter. I was in a depressed mood. But now I shall explain it to you: Poo. P= Person O=Operated O=Octopus Thank you for your time. Kitsune Orenjii, Neo-Norway News |
Dear Kitsune Orenjii,
Kyoji: ...I'm not sure that really made anything less confusing. Wong: ...I can't think of anything to say to that. Michelo: Person operated octopus? What are you on? Ulube: ...So poo wasn't an insult then...right? Master Asia: BAH! This is mindless dribble! IT'S NOT WORTH OUR TIME! |
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02/03/05
Dear DG Master Asia, I believe I could take you in a game of Jeopardy. What say you, One-with-large-stick-up-his-butt? Wong, I have a very yummy suggestion for you. Try Green Tea Ice Cream sometime. It's very good. Kyoji, thank-you for letting me talk to Schwartz! Urube-san, do you use super-glue to keep your mask on? Michelo-san, Have you ever woken up in bed with another man? Lots Of Love, The "Emperor" |
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Dear "The Emperor",
Master Asia: Jeopardy? WHAT IS THIS?! Like I, Master Asia, would waste my time on a stupid game show! SUCH FOOLISHNESS! I have no sick up my butt! BAH! Wong: Hmmm Green Tea ice cream? That does sound interesting. I tried to get the Green Tea pocky Jill had.... she doesn't know how to share. ;_; Kyoji: Dou itashimashite. I'm sure he enjoyed the fanmail. >_><_<;;; Ulube: Super glue?! No! Never... that's not good for your skin. Michelo: ...WHA WHA... WHAT?! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!!! YOU'RE KIDDING ME RIGHT?!?! I'M NOT ANWSERING THAT ONE! NOT FOR ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD! |
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02/11/05
Hey Wong ~Sachi |
Dear Sachi,
Wong: Hey. >_><_< Pocky? |
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02/13/05
yo, Michelo, I'm sorry. My doctor says I'm not supposed to tell people what drugs I take. ^.^ Asia, I was wondering. Does it ever bother you that you made Domon cry? More than once? -Kitsune |
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Dear Kitsune,
Michelo:... HAHAHAHAH YOU HAVE TO TAKE PILLS!!! WHAT'S THE MATTER?! NOT RIGHT IN THE HEAD?! AHAHAHAHAH!!! Master Asia: HA! Never! See? He's weak! HE COULD HAVE NEVER DEFEATED ME! Why would I be bothered by that? FEH! |
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02/14/05
To view your eCard, choose from the options below. Click on the following link. Hi, I sent you an eCard from BlueMountain.com |
Dear "The Emperor",
Kyoji: Dou itashimashite. Though...that was a very odd card. Remind me to give you something on White Day. Master Asia: What mindless dribble that was! THAT MUSIC WAS HORRIBLE! Bah! stupid holiday! Michelo: ... that was disturbing... I hope you die. Wong: Ah, Happy Valentine's Day. Ulube: Thanks for the card...but... it was a bit...odd. |
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02/14/05
Happy Valentine's Day! Master Asia, I may not be a delusional Gundam Fighter who got their ass whopped by their former student, but I AM the Emperor and I AM the Ken Jennings of amateur Jeopardy! NOW will you play some Jeopardy with me? Onegai? Kyoji-san, last Monday in class, Schwartz said Sensei was handsome....just thought I'd let you know. Sorry, that's all I can think of. Bai bai! "The Emperor" |
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Dear "The Emperor",
Master Asia: NO! NEVER! Jeopardy is a pathetic game show! I WOULD NEVER DISGRACE MYSELF IN THAT MANOR! ... delusional? YOU DON'T KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD! Kyoji: ... Nani?! He did?!... But...but... How? I mean...uh... >_><_< Is that so? >_><_< |
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02/16/05
Dear Michelo, I hope you die too. -"The Emperor" |
Dear "The Emperor",
Michelo: ...I got out of bed for this?! >____< Do me a favor and jump off a bridge or something. |
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02/18/05
Hey Guys! Happy Belated Valentines day!!! Oi It's been Hell but I MADE IT THROUGH!!!! *ahem* anywys I wanyed to ask you guys your biggest fears....>_><_< jes for the helluvit! Toodles!!! Neko Navis/ Obsidian Angel ^.^* |
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Dear Neko Navis,
Kyoji: Biggest fear? Hmmmm ano... I'm not sure actually. I suppose dying alone... but then again... I suppose not. Uh... I don't know. Gomen nasai. Master Asia: Fears? HA! I, have no fears! I AM FEARLESS! Foolish girl! Waste someone else's time with these pointless questions. Michelo: Why would I tell ya what I was afraid of? Feh. That kind of stuff can be used as blackmail. Wong: Fear... hmmm... no more chocolate. Ulube: You know what's scary? Kyoji before he get's his morning tea. |
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02/18/05
URUBE!!!! You back stabbing, woman stealing, little bastard!!!!! Vega belongs to ME not you insignificant spot!!!! I can stomp you out of exsistance if wanted to but don't want your blood on brand new boots!! Instead I'll rip your insides out and wring you like the chicken you are with your own intestines!!! How do like that eh!!!! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! Fuck You!! >:) Lt. General Ra Kim P.S. Neo Japan sucks! Neo Korea all the way!!! |
Dear Ra Kim,
Ulube: How did you find me here?! Ugh! And don't think the dear attached to this response is a kind gesture. I'm required to write that. You need to get over the past. You lost, simple as that. As for ripping out my insides, I'd like to see you try. I didn't know that was possible through e-mail. Why don't you go amuse yourself with a violent video game or what not. You're wasting my time. |
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02/18/05
Zdrastvuyete Urushka, Remember me? Your wife? Oh I just wanted to say I still love you with all my heart. Even though our relationship is long distance I pray everyday that we'd be together forever. I hope you can visit me in Neo Poland sometime. Love Ambassador Vega Welasea Ishikawa (Neo Poland) |
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Dear Vega,
Ulube: Seems I getting most of the mail lately. ^^; Sorry I haven't been in touch. You wouldn't believe what you have to go to get the phone around here. >_><_< Taking a trip sounds nice right about now. Unfortunitly I'm a bit short on cash right now. The rent around here keeps going up. ^^; I should stop making excuses huh? >_><_< Uh... I miss you. |
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02/24/05
Dear Kyoji, Can you explain how Schwartz is at this con? Love, "The Emperor" |
Dear "The Emperor",
Kyoji: O____O? Ummm well uh... you see >_><_< ano... that is an imposter. I can assure you of that. It's just like Jill's Wong costume. Schwartz doesn't go out much anymore. >_><_< Uh... thanks for the letter. Sayonara. |
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02/24/05
Dear Wong and Master Asia, I found these and thought you might like them. Enjoy. Wong Master Asia Master Asia, you still look like you have a stick up your bootay. Is your body too bootilicious for the stick? Shits and Giggles, The Emperor |
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Dear "The Emperor",
Wong: Hmm, that is rather amusing. Even on a small scale I look good. *smirk* Master Asia: What is this? BOOTILICIOUS?! Can't you use real words?! ANNOYING PEST! Bah! That image does no justice to my appearance. PATHETIC! |
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02/26/05
Yo! Miss me? *wraps arms around Kyoji-san* *kiss oniichan on cheek* How ya'll doing? eh, I'm ok. Just my body is sore from training with grandma...do you know how hard she is?!?!?! She is harder than O' Billy Goat! She almost kills me at times! I swear!....eh, anyway. I bring riceballs for everyone! *hands a plate full of riceballs* Won't stay too long. Hey onnichan, you wanna go get sushi or raman tonight? You don't mind paying, do you? I'm broke ^___^;; hehe Laterz all and enjoy the food! and yes Wong, they do have chocolate in them, German chocolate to be more accurate. Love, Alisha Kasshu |
Dear Alisha,
Kyoji: Ah imoto... Ohayou Gozaimasu. Thanks for the riceballs. Hmm sushi or ramen. Sure, I can pay. Jiru-san let me off the hook for rent this month, since I went out and did all the grocery shopping. ^_^ Wong: Chocolate? Ah, Kyoji has such a nice sister. ^___________^ Master Asia: Hmph! I would never eat such junk! FEH! Michelo: Yeah! Free food! ...wait a minute... Kyoji doesn't have to pay this month?! Is that why my bill went up?! Ulube: My rent is higher this month as well! Kyoji: Heh... let's go get that sushi now, Alisha. ^^; *sneaks off* |
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03/07/05
Dear Michelo, There's a nice, tall, narrow bridge near here and next time you're "free" (a.k.a. SOBER) we'll BOTH jump off it together. Sound like a date? Love, The Emperor |
| Dear "The Emperor",
Michelo: ...No... |
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03/07/05
Dear Master Asia, How do you explain that stash of Yaoi smut underneath your bed? - The Emperor |
Dear "The Emperor",
Master Asia: WHAT?! This is and OUTRAGE! There is no such material under my bed! And how would you know?! YOU'VE NEVER BEEN IN MY ROOM! |
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03/09/05
Dear Master Asia, Of course I've been in your room. I've been in your room lots of times. I've even had a drunken (naked) Chibodee make love with your pillows. And that porn was really kinky. Who knew Master Asia was into S&M. Love, The Emperor |
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Dear "The Emperor",
Master Asia: What is this? HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH THINGS?! I don't believe a word. PATHETIC! Go bother someone else! I HAVE NO PORN!...and my pillows! THAT DRUNK HAS BEEN NO WHERE NEAR MY PILLOWS! |
