| Something Like You |
| [[This is the worst week of my life]] Lance thought as he barely contained his tears singing 'Gone' he kept glancing over at Jc, missing him more and more with each passing second. [[It's your own fault he's gone James!]] His innervoice scolded [[You pushed him away! You never told him how much you love him, need him, can't live without him! You were the one who started that stupid argument that lost him forever]] Lance kept barrating himself during the rest of the concert and he wanted to cry when Jc held his hand during 'The Game Is Over'. Lance couldn't finish this torturous concert fast enough and as soon as it ended he was getting dressed and headed back to the hotel and when he was safely in his hotel room he let the tears fall. [[I miss Josh so much! God why'd I never tell him I loved him?]] Lance's question went unanswered [[Why did I start that stupid argument? I need him! I have to get him back]] Lance thought back to all the moments he and Josh had shared during their 6 months together; every touch, every smile, every glance, every kiss. Lance had loved Josh for years before they finally began dating, part of the reason they hadn't got together earlier was that he had been going out with his ex-boyfriend. Justin. Lance closed his eyes fighting back more tears, a major cause of their breakup had been Justin, and Lance's overwhelming jealousy of him. Lance started sobbing as he remembered that fateful day nearly a week ago when Josh broke up with him. -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-FLASHBACK-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ Lance was sitting at the desk in his and Josh's hotel room, reading his e-mail. Or at least trying to he couldn't get anything done because Josh was out with Justin playing basketball and Lance knew he wouldn't relax until Josh walked through those door and into his arms. Lance's mind started to wander and he thought about what Jc and Justin were doing. When all that did was conjure up images he really didn't want to see he asked himself the queston that was really bothering him ::Was Jc cheating on him? With Justin?:: Lance shook his head [[Josh would never do that to me! Would he?]] Lance was just depressing himself with these thoughts so he resolved to watch some tv, but his mind couldn't leave it alone. ::Was Jc cheating on him?:: 20 minutes later Jc walked in smiling, "Hey babe." Jc walked over and gave Lance a quick peck which did nothing to soothe Lance's insecurity, "I'm all sweaty after playing with Justin. I'm gonna shower 'kay?" Lance knew he should have said ok and left to calm down but no he couldn't do that! He had to start the conversation that would put the final nail in the coffin of their relationship, "You had a good time playing with Justin?" Josh rolled his eyes, "Yeah I had a good time, just like you do when you leave me to go and party every-fucking-where because you're Mr Hollywood, can't stay away from a club for one-fucking-night to spend time with me; your boyfrind, in case you forgot." Lance glared at Josh, "I ask you to come with me." Josh glared back, "Is that supposed to mean something? You know I don't really like clubs! You know I would rather stay at home and curl up with my lover!" "Well Justin hasn't come to a club in a while so I'm sure you've got your lover by your side while I'm on my own!" "By *choice*" Jc growled between clenched teeth, he really loved Lance but there are obvious signs that Lance would never trust him. Lance noticed Josh didn't answer whether he was with Justin or not and it tore at Lance's heart, he asked the question he never thought he would ever have to ask, "Are you cheated on me with Justin, Josh?" Josh tood there frozen in shock before shouting, "No! You honestly think I would play around on you? Do really think that little of me? Of us?" "You never answered my question." Lance said quietly while desperately trying to hold back tears. "Yes I did!" "No...you didn't." Lance whispered with a heavy heart, "You never answered me when I asked, do you hang around with Justin while I'm not here?" "Of course I do! He's one of my best friends." Josh answered agitated, ::What is Lance's problem:: "Who is also your ex-lover Jc! You were each others first love Josh you don't loose that kind of love easily." Jc laughed without an inch of humor, "Yes I loved him but we changed, we weren't what the other wanted anymore," Josh sighed, "Lance are you ever going to trust me?" "I trust you." Lance didn't even believe his own words so how could Jc. Josh snorted, "Yeah and I'm in love with Chris. Try again." Lance swallowed hard, "I do trust you." Josh had enough of Lance's lying, "No you fucking don't! Ever since we got together you have acted childlike and stupid and you wouldn't even give Justin the time of day! Do you expect me to want to be with you if you act like an insecure loser because I still love Justin..." Lance cut him off, "I knew you were cheating on me!" Josh's jaw tightened, "I'm not cheating on you!" Josh pinned Lance with his intense gaze, "And what I was going to say was I still love Justin and always will but I'm not *in* love with him. When are you going to trust me?" Lance blurted out his true feelings instantly regretting them the moment they left his lips, "I won't ever trust you as long as Justin's here!" Josh couldn't believe those words had actually left Lance's mouth, "That's it! I can't do this anymore. I can't risk my heart just to get hurt because you don't trust me and never will." Josh took a deep breath, "It's over. Don't ask to be friends because I can't right now." Josh had packed up and left, Lance was in too much shock to stop him. -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-END FLASHBACK-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ And that is how Lance came to be standing nervously outside the hotel room of his love, hoping beyond hope that Jc comes back to him. He timidly knocks and waits for Jc to open the door, and when he does Josh coldly asks, "What do you want?" Lance swallowed hard as icy blue eyes looked straight into his damaged soul, "I was an idiot. I made a mistake, I really think we should talk." "You said all I needed to hear when you told me you'll never trust me. Goodbye Lance." And he slammed the door. Lance's tears started to fall soon after and he began banging on Josh's door to get him to open it and talk to him. To forgive him, "Josh please! I'm sorry." Lance leaned his head against the door, the only answer he got was a 'go away' and he couldn't do that. He needed Josh, he's nothing without Josh, then he thought of something that might work. [[Please work...]] Lance silently begged. "Josh I am so sorry! I love you, please baby, come back to me." Lance was speaking from his soul and sang, tears refecting in his voice causing it to quaver with emotion: "So many times I thought I held it in my hands But just like grains of sands Love slipped through my fingers So many nights I asked the Lord above Please make me lucky in love To find a love that lingers Something keeps telling me That you could be my answered prayer You must be heaven sent I swear 'Cause" Lance was surprised when he saw the door open and Josh stood there with tears running down his face as he took my hand and sang the chorus with me. "Something happens when you look at me I forget to speak Something happens when you kiss my mouth my knees get so weak Could it be true This is what God has meant for me 'Cause baby I can't believe That something like you Could happen to me" Josh opened his arms and Lance collapsed into his warm embrace sobbing as Josh gently sang in his ear: "Boy in your eyes I feel your fire burn All your secrets I will learn Even if it takes forever With you by my side I can do anything I don't care what tomorrow brings As long as were together My heart is telling me That you could be my meant to be I know it more each time we touch 'Cause" Lance sniffled and look into those blue eyes he missed more then Josh'll ever know and he gently, timidly brought his lips to Josh's and gave him a chaste kiss. Josh smiled at Lance, "Lance let's go into my room. We need to talk." Lance entwined their fingers and followed Josh, he would do anything his love asks to get him back. Anything. He and Josh are meant to be together. |
| Chapter 1 |