Eco-battiness, Humbugs, Ignorance, and Quackery by Your Friend Benj Morgan and others. Hucksterism,
Now as Benjamin Morgan reported in his book about his experience with hypocrites, Miss Julia Spear gave the following definitions:
Fashion -- the art of doing all you can for the benefit of the dry goods dealer, the milliner and the dressmaker, regardless of your own comfort, or the condition of your father's pocketbook or credit. Washington Irving wrote in Salmagundi (or the Whim-Whams and Opinions of Lancelot Langstaff, Esq) vivid descriptions of the fashion world of 1807. How little times have changed.
Music -- a charming sensation when it is properly made but if it lacks a chord, or has too many chords, it makes you feel as if a drag was being hauled over you, and has a tendency to strain your nervous system.
Manners -- is to know how to behave decent. When you go to a stranger's house you should scrape your feet on the edge of the porch floor; either before or after you go in, remove your hat or bonnet, make a pretty bow and smile sweet, and shake hands with the person that greets you at the door, unless it should be the hired girl, at which time you are not expected to act decent.
Money -- is the most powerful lever in the world. You can control governments and manipulate the courts just as you desire, and control elections. You can command the attention of all the sycophants of the country. You can buy the average minister to pass you off as a Christian, and at your funeral send you into the fair kingdom.
Character -- the one thing which money can't buy. You can't get it with any kind of price. However, you and all of us can have it; it is true, honest and upright.
Politics -- Politics is a fine art, and one that requires a good deal of shrewdness and studying. It consist of a through knowledge of how to bamboozle the people, or, in other and more comprehensive language, how to pull the wool over the eyes of the people so they can only see the outside of you. The bold outlines is this art is to work all the points to insure the candidate's election. The deep shades and dark background is the principal work done after he is elected.
The United States has got within its borders an innumerable host of proficient scholars and old masters in the school of politics. For hypocrisy and sham they excel an equal number to be found in the world.
Time -- is a thing most people want more of 'especially if they are short on a deal,'(attributed to an uncle who was a trader in grain in Chicago).
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Shams or Uncle Ben's Experience with Hypocrites was written by Benjamin Morgan of Morganville, Blank County, N. Y. and published by H. J. Smith and Co. of Philadelphia, Chicago, Kansas City and Oakland California in 1889. Actually Ben Morgan is a pseudonym for John Smith Draper. The book is delightful in describing Ben and Clarissa's experiences when they bought a low-cost ticket for a trip from Morganville to California and back.
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I highly recommend the book as much for what it said about hypocrites in the 1800's as to its timeliness in appraising our current life and times.
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