Goldman's Grudge
As a mosquito named George settled down on a blood-filled arm for a drink, he heard the familiar voice of his friend. "Hi George! Is that blood tasty?"
"Yeah, I love this blood. I love this life. I am completely satisfied with my great happiness. Well, I guess that's true, except for this really annoying ache in my needle. It makes me so angry. Why does this pain have to come to me, of all mosquitoes? And, you know, this wind is making me cold. I can't stand this coldness here."
"Hey, quit complaining and watch out. Remember last time you got angry? You flew into a tree. That's probably why your needle is hurting. Anyway - Hey watch out! That guy's looking at you. Now, he's bringing his arm back for the swing. Move fast, George."
This hand was going to kill him. George did not have time to escape. It came closer. This hand had taken over his life! "Stop it, you bloodthirsty hand!" he shouted furiously "Neither you nor anything will never again control my life! I will furtively take over the world." Thus, his diabolical plan of world domination began. And then he died.
He was dead for but a short time. George was back to carry out his devious plan in the form of an innocent eighth grade Technology teacher, Mr. Goldman.
"Um" announced Mr. Goldman on another gloomy day in cell-phone-free D13.
"That's interesting," noted a student.
A memory of a previous life jabbed Mr. Goldman. He stared maliciously at the conversing children. "Be careful or I'll take over" he proclaimed irritably.
"Take over the school?" whispered a one student to another.
"No. He's gonna take over the whole world," the other student joked.
These students did not realize the importance of what they were saying. However, other students did.
"Oh my God, he's going to take over the world!" shrieked Greg during football practice. Greg was a guard on the football team and a sufferer of deutschphobia, fear of people taking over the world.
"We know he's doing something," Jeremy replied suspiciously. "Can't you feel that it is hollow underground?"
"Yeah and there's that weird noise like someone is typing below our field," commented Josh.
"That reminds me of something. Did you ever wonder why some of the school's computers have disappeared?" asked Jeremy.
"Everyone in our tech class knows about that. Mr. Goldman discreetly "borrowed" them. But we caught him. He told us he needed the computers for classified purposes. He also bought a whole bunch of computers," replied Josh.
"Shut up, you mental midget and start this abomination!" the coach yelled.
"Let's configure a plan in the LGI after practice," hissed Jeremy to his fellow players.
"Do you want me to get crayons and draw you a picture?"
After practice everyone assembled in the LGI.
"He had to put those computers he stole somewhere," Jeremy decided.
"Oh, he must have put them under our football field," speculated Josh. "Didn't you hear the typing sound?"
"So he built a secret underground computer laboratory and he took a bunch of computers and is using them for his plan to take over the world," joked Josh.
"Why is my computer so slow?" questioned Greg in an annoyed tone.
"I bet it has to do Mr. Goldman's evil plan," answered Josh sarcastically.
"I wouldn't be surprised if it were." Jeremy alleged.
"Stop trying to sound smart."
"No, I'm serious. All Mr. Goldman's secret computers are sucking speed from the network. We need to do something."
"So we know he's doing this but why and how will we stop him?" asked Greg.
"I think I know how," Jeremy assured them with confidence. "You know that day when workmen kept coming out of that tunnel into our tech room? They must have been building his computer lab. They got to it through the tunnel."
"We'll have to investigate after school when no one's around," cautioned Josh.
"Are you saying we'll have to break into school?" Greg asked timidly.
"Sort of," Josh replied.
They got to school at six. After checking that no teachers were around, they entered the D building and sought the custodian.
"We left our tech project in the tech room," Jeremy told the custodian, Ian.
"We were wondering if you could let us in so we could bring it home and work on it," Josh asked.
"Sure. Just close the door when you leave," Ian answered.
The boys looked around the room pretending to search for their presentation until the custodian left. They were actually looking for the door to the passageway. It was no longer there.
Just when they had given up, Josh stood up and used Mr. Goldman's method of requesting silence. "Take five," he said and fell into a tunnel.
"I know how to do this!" exclaimed Jeremy.
He walked over to where Josh had been and shouted, "Take five!" Suddenly, he fell through to the tunnel.
Filled with trepidation, Greg followed him into the tunnel using the same method.
After trekking through what seemed to be an endless tunnel, the trio emerged into a large, white room and were met by an average-sized emu who tried to escort them back through the tunnel in a friendly manner. Its friendliness soon turned to force.
"Kill that emu!" shouted Josh as the emu attempted to drive him backwards. He did not have any time to evaluate the situation: he did not want any time for thinking. The single issue on Josh's mind was discovering Mr. Goldman's plan and this emu was his only obstacle.
"Don't kill it!" Jeremy said calmly. "Let's just hold the emu down and examine it rationally."
Greg, however, began to choke the emu. "Tell us everything you know!" he demanded.
Unfortunately, emus don't talk.
Greg was filled with anger; he hated emus. In his childhood, Greg had a catastrophic accident with an emu. This caused his lack of self-confidence. Greg was so angry that he choked the emu to death. When the emu died, it instantly transformed into Mr. Goldman. He stared at them and gasped. "Now I have learned, anger is self-destructive."
He then frantically threw six floppy disks onto a magnetic board on the floor where they arranged themselves in a pattern. Mr. Goldman uttered two familiar words, "Take Five."
"Which five?" Jeremy asked anxiously.
Mr. Goldman did not answer Jeremy's question. Instead, his face turned bright red and his anger consumed him. His anger took the form of the highly radioactive chemical, AGITATION 'H,' and engulfed his body. This caused a chain nuclear reaction after which Mr. Goldman spontaneously combusted.
Suddenly a message popped up on the overhead projector. It read, "W."
Jeremy realized that five disks were arranged in the shape of a "W," besides one that was alone. He took the five that made the "W" and put them into the smallest computer which conveniently had five floppy drives.
There was one large file on all the disks. It was a PowerPoint presentation. Jeremy boldly opened the presentation. They watched as it told them Mr. Goldman's plan.
He had built his secret lab and passageway over the summer. Through out the year, he had bought many computers and had taken others from the school. He had used their combined power to configure a sixty-gigabyte compatible motherboard with a one-hundred-eighty-gigabyte compatible mega board and set his clock to 45 milliseconds behind central Greenwich communications zone. This caused a microbus of power and resulted in the extinction of an obscure species of skunks on an island off Peru. More important, the computers had sucked much of the mind power out of almost everyone who came within a mile of the High School. The computers could control what was happening in the world by using the eight-ninths of the controlled people's brains that they do not use. Thus, he built up a strong army of mind power to take over the world.
Jeremy, Josh, and Greg were flabbergasted that such a seemingly benign teacher would build such an ingenious system for such malevolent intentions. It took them three nights of deep analysis to untangle the complexities of Goldman's lab. They took a few nights off to catch up on sleep but were soon back. Meanwhile, another species of skunks died in the northern reaches of New Jersey.
After another week, they had formulated a plan. The students immediately utilized the mind power and used it to settle the current problems in the world. Within six weeks they employed humanity's brainpower to discover a cure for the common cold. Soon they had found an antidote to cancer and a solution to the conflicts in the Middle East. After all the conflicts were resolved and the world was set on the right path, they disbanded the mind control and kept the whole issue a secret.