"It's A Scream!"	Year of Release: 2000 Directed by: John Blanchard Running Time: Approx. 86 minutes Rating: R Listing on the A.K.A. Page: YES! Click here! A Second Opinion: The B-Hive Buy it on DVD at: Amazon.com or Movies Unlimited.com. My Rating:

Screw Frombehind- Popular student of Bulemia Falls High School and first victim of the Killer. She ends up running face first into a bug zapper while fleeing from the Killer.

Doughy Prime Suspect- Tom Arnold! Named after his father (who was a baker), Doughy is a mall security guard, hot on the trail of the Killer. Stops his evil twin cousin's murdering spree.

Hagatha Utslay- Tiffany Amber Thiessen! An EMP-TV reporter (Hehehehe.) who's covering the story of the recent high school murders in the area. She and Doughy begin a blossoming love relationship, but in the end she leaves him for a pizza delivery guy. (If you haven't yet noticed her last name is pig latin for "slut!")

Dawson- New kid at Bulemia High. He and Martina fall in love by the end of the film. He also helps bring the Killer to justice.

Boner- "It's pronounced, Bonner!"(Hehehehe.) He's a really horny little guy who finally loses his virginity to a nurse at the film's end. He apparently dies of a heart attack, but is saved due to an overdose of VIAGRA.

Barbara- A complete slut, diagnosed with Syphillis, Gonorrea, Clamidia, Crabs, and Herpes. After escaping the killer time and time again, she gets stung by a bee and dies from an allergic reaction.

Slab- Complete moron, who happens to be illiterate. He takes a massive dose of steroids which causes his head to explode.

Martina- Supposedly a lesbian but it turns out she's just a little more masculine than most other girls. She beats up the Killer, saves Dawson, and the two love birds live happily ever after... I think.

Principal Interest- Coolio! The Administrator Formerly known as PRINCIPAL! Hehehehehe. He ends up falling into a hot tub with a lamp.

The Killer- Self explanatory! He originally donned a hockey mask but it caught fire and melted into the ghost mask from "Scream." Hehehehe. He fails to knock off anyone, and shakes his head in dismay whenever a character ends up stupidly killing themselves. Apparently stalking is harder than it looks. Turns out to be Doughy's evil twin cousin... Arnie? Or was it Harvey? In any case, he's played by... Tom Arnold!

All I have to say right now is this. This movie is what "Scary Movie" should have been! If you're reading this and disagree... GO TO HELL! This is MY opinion OK?! Your opinion doesn't matter right now. (To all those offended by that last line, I apologize. Please continue reading.) Anyways after that awkward moment... this movie is hilarious in a stupid kind of way. Unlike it's predecessor, Scary Movie, this film is short, and keeps up a good pace. It also keeps you laughing from start to finish (if you give in to the easily amused teenager within). If I may, I shall now make a list of things this film makes fun of:
Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Friday the 13th, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Child's Play, Dawson's Creek, Titanic, Scary Movie, Halloween, Prince, teenagers (in general), Pam and Tommy Lee, sex (that's a given in a parody), law enforcement, Mentos, Grease, Lassie, homosexuality, high school (refers back to teenagers), Christine (you know, the movie with the Killer Car?!), There's Something About Mary, Baywatch, The Incredible Hulk (Slab in the overdose of steroids scene), drug usage, POP-UP Video, M-TV, Home Alone, Star Wars, and even makes fun of itself. Whew, I think I covered everything...NO wait! It also makes fun of Phantom of the Opera. Ok I think I'm done.
The best part of this movie is, there's no male (but sadly no female) NUDITY! Anyways, it starts off with the Killer calling Screw Frombehind. The Killer keeps her pre- occupied on the phone as he sneaks into the house. He suddenly appears and begins chasing Screw around the kitchen counter... again... and.... again... and again... you get the idea. The chase stops when the phone rings. The Killer answers it and gives Screw the phone. Screw tells her friend on the other side of the line that she'll call her back, and then runs outside, face first into a bug zapper. The Killer then lights up a cigarette, but accidentally lights his hockey mask on fire (what the hell? Was it covered in gasoline or something?). He douses his head in a bird bath, and when he looks up, we see that the mask has melted into the ghost mask (from "Scream")! HAHAHA! I rewound that about 8 times (that just shows how petty and easily amused I really am).
Then we meet our cast of characters. Boner, the hopelessly horny loser, Barbara, the doorknob of the group (everyone had a turn at her... well except for Boner), Slab, the total idiot, Dawson, the new kid who's trying to fit in, and Martina, the masculine girl who ends up falling for Dawson. Ok so the whole movie revolves around them avoiding a killer who, obviously, is not good at what he does. Through the course of the whole film, he never really kills anyone. All the deaths are accidental. While the kids try to escape the Killer, Officer Doughy Prime Suspect and Reporter Hagatha Utslay are hot on the trail of the murderer. After each of the kids has a run-in with the Killer, and after Mentos and "Grease Lightning" are parodied, the teens all have a huge party at Slab's house.
At his house, the Killer attempts to kill them, but fails every time. The Killer is about to slice Boner with a chainsaw, but Boner has a heart attack before that can be done. Barbara is also about to be done in with a weed-wacker, but she is stung by a bee and dies of an allergic reaction. And Slab... well he ends up killing himself with an overdose of steroids. Later that evening, as the Killer chases Martina and Dawson, the movie suddenly becomes a POP-UP Video! HAHAHAHA! Anyways, Martina knocks out the Killer and Dawson sits down and pulls off at least 60 masks off of the Killer's face. It turns out the Killer is none other than... Doughy's evil identical twin cousin (or rather, Tom Arnold with a mustache drawn on his face)?! Well the Killer is shot 6 times and is beaten with baseball bats by police officers (Rodney King!), but he still gets away. The film ends with Martina and Dawson going for a stroll in the dark woods to be alone and Boner, as it turns out, is still alive. He took a massive dose of VIAGRA which kept his blood flowing and circulating. Then the end credits roll. But Wait! At the end of the film there's a kind of Where are they now thing. Or should I say a "WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY NOW!?" kind of thing. Now I loved this movie, but I'm sure that others will openly disagree with my opinion. Sure it has some flaws (probably due to a miniscule budget and Tom Arnold) and it's humor is mostly sophomoric in nature, but there's plenty to like about it too. The best way to approach this movie is to NOT compare it to Scary Movie. As hard as it may be to do that, give it a whirl and maybe you'll enjoy this flick as much as I have.

Killer: "Anyways, do you like Scary Movies?"
Screw: "Oh, you mean Spike Lee movies?"
Killer: "Look! Lay off the Spikester, he's keepin' it real!"

Doughy: "Guys, that's not how you treat a lady, unless she burns the toast."

Barbara: "Slab, give me a hand."
Slab: "Isn't the trophy enough?"
Barbara: "Yes, but we have to dump this dear."
Slab: "Ok sweetie."

Pizza Guy: "Twenty Four Hour Pizza, if we're not here in 24 hours we're not coming!"

Doughy: "Pizza guys get all the pussy."