| My Gangsta Style draft, and what...Phil thinks? |
| 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 |
| Round 13 |
| G Howard Mike Jason Danny Stefan Phil Pokey Joe Arun Oleg Ade |
| Pick Player/My Ranking/Tier What does Master !Phil! think? |
| New York Giants DEF U Tier Points: 3 Matt Stover K #7 Tier Points: 4 Peter Warrick Joe's Ranking: 96 Tier Points: 2 Donald Driver Joe's Ranking: No. Tier Points: Nah. James Allen Joe's Ranking: 71 Tier Points: 3 Rob Johnson Joe's Ranking: U Tier Points: Nada. Jeremy Shockey TE #7 Tier Points: 2 Jacquez Green Joe's Ranking: U Tier Points: Zilch. Chris Redman Joe's Ranking: 120 Tier Points: 3 Willie Jackson Joe's Ranking: U Tier Points: Haha. Quincy Morgan Joe's Ranking: 127 Tier Points: 1 Adam Vinatieri K #10 Tier Points: 3 |
| After drafting a young Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf last round, G picks a respectable D. Joe doesn't have 'em ranked too high, but the G-Men are A-OK in my book. They gots Strahan and Seh...uh, Brandon Short. After all, G can't make a pick much worse than Chris Jackson, can he? Stay tuned... Howard drafts an accurate kicker in Matt Stover, and he probably thought to himself, "The Ravens won't score touchdowns, they'll have to settle for three! Eureka!" Problem is, the Ravens might not have enough firepower to get in field goal range, either. Their QB is Chris Redman, and he's not the worst player on the offense. Yowza. The Ravens suck. Peter Warrick? I don't know about this one. He's a Cincy Bungle! Also, he shows flashes of brilliance, but for the most part, isn't very productive. I would have taken Donald Driver or Az-Zahir Hakim before him, or maybe a few rookies, but this pick isn't terribly bad. Plus, we can call him "Big Pete" in honor of the quintessential Saved By The Bell backup nerd. Joe doesn't have Donald Driver ranked, but he was Favre's go-to WR going into the season. That's bad for the Packers, but good for Jason. Javon Walker may eventually get more catches than ol' Don, but for now, Jason is in the Driver's seat with this pick. Ha! Wait, that wasn't funny. It was marginally clever, though, grant me that. Yes, he was a starter going into the year. However, he is also a Texan, and Jonathon Wells should be getting more carries than him soon, if he isn't already. For such reasons, I have no choice but to look down on this pick. I lie. The main reason I look down on this pick is because it's James friggin' Allen. He sucks. Not a bad choice as a backup, 'cause everyone's heard Gruden loves his athleticism...and his firm ass. Hey man, that's just what I heard. I have no idea how firm Rob Johnson's ass is. Maybe that's why Stefan picked him. Or maybe it's 'cause he thought he might have a chance to start eventually. One reason is viable, one is not. It's up to your personal beliefs to decide which is which. I think this was a steal for yours truly. Everyone had to hear all of the hype surrounding him, and I was sure someone would bite early, but no! I get lucky and he falls all the way to round 13, allowing me the chance to draft for depth earlier. The likes of David Sloan and Desmond Clark went before Shockey, and that's bad for those guys (Arun and Mike), but great for me. Clear!...and he Shocks the Globe! Jacquez "So Fresh and So" Green Green is not a good pick. I understand the 'Skins are pass-happy now, but he's not one of their major options regardless. Plus, did he get slower, or is it just me? His best attribute used to be his speed, now his best attribute is...uh...his knowledge of the Smurfs' universe. Ask him to catch a 20-yard out, and we have a problem, but the man knows his Gargamel. Joe uses his now infamous "monopoly method," in which he grabs as many relevant players as he can at an important position. Knowing how passers are at a premium in this league, Joe takes his 4th QB. Too bad it's Chris Redman, who, when most people see his name, what they really see is "Stay the hell away. Avoid me like the plague. I am the fantasy plague. Seriously. I will kill your whole team." "Slick" Willie Jackson is not any good, but I guess Vick needs to throw to someone. I thought it'd be Finneran or someone else, though. Arun probably saw the name and mistook "Willie" for "Veggie." The last two letters are the same, and what is a "W" but two "V's," anyway? He got all excited and drafted the man in a heartbeat. When he found out it was actually Willie Jackson, he cried himself to sleep. Luis said so. Quincy Jones is the man. Most Grammys ever! Quincy Morgan is no Quincy Jones, even if he has a few good weeks. For a backup WR, he's a solid pick. Even if he does play for the Cleveland Brownies. Drew Carey's favorite team. 'Nuff said. Vinatieri is an accurate kicker, and certainly a good pick for that Don, da-Don, Don, Don. He has to play in cold weather, but that hasn't hurt him much in the past. He also won the Super Bowl last year. He also got them to the Super Bowl last year. If he likes rice, Ade will really be down with him. Ade loves his rice. Not plain rice, though. Gotta spice that shit up, maybe put some chicken in it. That's the ticket. Winners: G, Howard, Mike, Jason, Stefan, Me, Oleg, Ade, Outkast, Quincy Jones, ALF, Jarome Iginla, Andre the Giant. Losers: Dan, Pokey, Joe, Arun, Riley, Gregory from across the hall, me and Ade's American Humor professor and anyone that owns a Kia. |