The
energy of words: Chapter Six
ASPECTS OF SOCIETY THAT LEAD
TO VIOLENCE AMONG TEENAGERS
The
energy of words:
Degrading
words are a form of pollution. Hate,
aggression, and anger directed towards others are creative forces that deplete
our personal life force. Regardless
of the status of the attacker, it is a false one because at any moment the
attacker can become attacked. Such
activities do not allow anyone to feel good about self and this is how it clouds
our emotions. As for the attacked, emotional reaction weakens self-respect and is
self-draining.
This is what has been happening in our schools, and although this type of harassment has always existed in some manner, it is now out of control. During my high school years, students hurled words such as “smack” and other derogatory terms into each other's faces continually. Words cut deeply into our psyches, just as acutely as a knife cutting our flesh.
We all know of instances when more passive students are tormented
unmercifully because they appear defenseless, either
by their demeanor or by
being alone. Often these attacks
end up in physical violence. It
doesn’t matter whether it is a cool group or nerdie group, this can happen in
any group or clique. These actions
occur among adults also, but adults are not trapped in restricted areas like
teens,
and the peer pressure is much less.
In such encounters teens
don’t usually find a semblance of any sympathy, let alone compassion, for any
teen who should reach a hand out to the tormented youth must have the courage to
withstand an attack that may now be directed at the would-be protector.
Psychologists, psychiatrists, and sociologists struggle to find the basis
and solution to school violence,
with no success beyond extremely tight security on school premises.
This holds true with adults also
as in the case of road rage, violence between neighbors,
or racial riots.
Perhaps it is because we have lost sight of how to honor, respect,
and love ourselves as Spirit. If we
are not shown such examples by our elders, how can we hope to treat others with
such consideration?
Globally we have Indigos
present right now who are prepared to use unorthodox and, at times, violent
means to forcefully direct attention to the inadequacies of the human society
in order to create honorable and equitable conditions for everyone.
Schools and children reflect the norms of a populated area.
We have seen some of them in action already.
We Indigos have extreme challenges, but then we are extremists,
and some of us will demonstrate how to bust non-functioning, passé systems;
some of us will devote our entire selves into healing, creating new avenues of
approach, and stabilizing them so that they function as we envision them.
But please, readers, do not wait for Indigos to do it all for if you do not desire or interact with our realities, we will be left on our own with perhaps less than smooth actions and reactions.
The life we build becomes
an individual one for each of us to explore. We each have our own diverse ideas,
responses, tastes, likes, and dislikes. Commonalities
attract us to each other. As with
elemental energies that either attract or repel, if we are not similar, we do
not stop to greet each other. We have Soul/Minds
that
can direct our decisions and
actions. We need not always respond
to another’s attitude that differs from ours with anything other than respect
for the other’s right of free will.
One aspect of counterbalancing the infection of disharmony and
unhappiness in another is by striving to understand why
the Ego-brain
chooses to live within these disruptive behaviors or conditions.
Or perhaps it is the other’s Soul/Mind who chose to place itself in dramas
that would force it to stretch his/her wings.
If we yearn to improve our lives and be more content, then we must either
commence, or if we have done so, continue to display compassion and
understanding in our own little environment.
These efforts ripple outward, spreading to others,
and ever rippling on.
I believe the statement, “Heaven is already here, we just don’t see
it yet,” to be most fitting.
Truth
and trustworthiness:
Part of the confusion within children today is that they do not experience safety in being who they truly are.
They are almost discouraged by society from telling the truth and they don't know whom to trust. There are many adults, both famous and infamous, and everyday moms and dads who talk the walk, but do not walk the talk. We see educators and teachers who are teaching principles that they do not exemplify in their lives. Where are clear role models for children?
Children need a safe space in which to be honest, where fears and doubts are shared, where it is all right to be angry and to question anything and everything. Children are not encouraged to ask questions in Sunday School or to challenge the religious instructor if they disagree. They are not encouraged to ask questions in school beyond those with which teachers feel comfortable.
Children
need
adults who will listen, not ridicule
their
questions,
and answer them as honestly
and sincerely as possible, even to the point of saying, “I don’t know.”
Many who are
children-at-risk can be likened to having their
heads in vises with some of them
having flat heads, like they
have been held upside down and squashed on the
ground. Some young Indigo teenagers
individually have tightly wound ideas about self and life, but these ideas
generally are warped. They are not
correct. Many young Indigos,
because of using drugs, too much alcohol or physical abuse,
have brain damage and don’t think quite right.
Indigos who have chosen to do this, with the restricting results, do not
know how to plan and think ahead in a logical fashion like those raised in a
healthy atmosphere are trained to do.
What is so important about trustworthiness that draws so much attention? More importantly is the interpretation teens place on how this characteristic plays out in their daily lives. Often teens see a lack of trust towards them by their peers and by adults. Is this because sometimes teens abuse trust by desiring instant gratification rather than abiding by their promises, or perhaps they feel it is easier to run from their problems and challenges by seeking an instant of happiness, fleeting though it is? When young, sometimes they feel betrayed by their best friends and family members.
How did this lack of trust between family members happen? Did adults reveal their own weaknesses that now reflect in their progeny? Adults don't always realize the subtle ways in which they expose their strengths, but particularly any weaknesses. And they are role models for their children. An obsolete saying among the forties and fifties generations was "Do as I say and not as I do." It just doesn't work that way.
For most of us, first
we have to trust ourselves, because this gives us stability, courage,
and the
strength to do that which we believe, regardless of the consequences or what
others may think.
What does it mean to be
trustworthy? Webster’s Dictionary
defines trustworthiness as being dependable and reliable.
It also means living up to expectations and refraining from self-serving
behavior that hurts and destroys relationships with others.
This is true,
not only in our social and family circles, but also in job-related areas.
One of the biggest challenges that we first face as we mature is
in gaining the trust of others. We
all have had the experience of our parents or guardians saying, “I want to
trust you,” when we go out for the evening.
As teenagers we strain at the bit to grow up and be adults instantly, but
in truth, these years are a time of exploration lying between childhood and
adulthood, almost like a null zone. “Where
do I fit in? Who am I? What choices
should I make?” Maturity and its
beneficial rewards are gained as we internalize the meaning of trustworthiness.
Life is full of opportunities and challenges that help us to
soar. Some parents do not demonstrate qualities in such a way that teenagers
recognize any benefits. Then it becomes much harder.
In such instances children
can make a decision to hold a vision of who
they
want
to be. If necessary, they
can seek a
role model who fits this vision in the person of a teacher, older relative,
youth group leader, or older friend. Through
all of this they
may always ask for spiritual help, for guidance to find someone
out in this big world to help them. This
help may come from unexpected sources, but they
have to ask.
Although we Indigos individually may not be displaying truth or
trustworthiness in our actions, it is a part of our nature when we entered
Earth’s vibrations. Our lives will become more productive and self-satisfying when we
acknowledge this need to receive and give it.
Compassion
and self-love:
We Indigos have come to help teach others to act out of compassion rather than judgment. There is a difference in the true meaning of the word “compassion” and the word “sympathy.”
We like to believe
that when we
are sympathetic we are acting as equals.
If we look deeply at the thoughts flowing through us when we utilize that
word to express our emotion of the moment, we may find that we actually feel a
little superior; that what we see shows us a lack of something, whether it is
food, clothing, housing, health, freedom from pain, poverty; anything that makes
us aware that without it we would feel uncomfortable in some manner. At times
while extending our sympathy, we fail to see that what may be uncomfortable to
us is normal and comfortable for the other.
To substantiate what I say, if we are
both in the same situation we don’t feel sympathy, we feel sameness.
This is why people in need often say, “I don’t need your sympathy.
I need your help,” meaning that action is more important for their
wellbeing at the moment, not an emotion.
Compassion is an empathetic response.
We stretch out with our hearts emotionally, share the discomfort of the
other, and when it is within our ability, may act in such a way as to help the
other help self. We feel their
emotions, whatever they may be, and by such sharing we actually lighten (lighten
up) their burdens for awhile.
Actions of a compassionate nature
express
equality towards or with another; empathetically listening and touching the
other’s feelings and thoughts, and respecting the other’s ideas even though
they may be unique.
We are connected like branches on a tree stretching towards the
sky, embracing the wind, and soaking up the rays of the sun. Each branch is an
extension of the tree. All of the
branches connected to this solid tree are a unit growing bigger and stronger
together. If a branch becomes diseased with a fungus or invaded by
insects, a strong tree can isolate the attacked branch and protect the rest of
itself from further infestation. If
it is weak, the entire tree is susceptible and vulnerable to slow death.
As soon as an affected branch sounds the alert that there is trouble, the
entire tree’s defenses spring into action to resist the attack, but it needs
the right conditions to heal this branch, and thus save the entire tree. The tree
needs sun, rain, and Love from its entire family in order to heal and survive.
Our global family needs attention,
kindness, and Love in order to remain strong and vibrant.
These tools of survival, protection,
and good health are
absolutely vital for
human family units also.
Healing begins within us in the form of
self-love. If we cannot nurture and
properly love ourselves, how can we aspire to be loving individuals? Are we to
be left with only an outlet of hating that which we truly seek
and desire--Love?
Many religions teach that the only way to achieve spirituality is through
suffering, sacrifice,
or martyrdom. In
other words, to feel miserable and, consequently, we are miserable.
Some of us have been taught that in suffering we achieve the highest
spirituality. These ideas help to create self-destructive paths, especially for
young people.
It may be true that during our growing-up years we are perhaps too self-centered and too intent on satisfying
everything that feels or tastes good. However,
as an alternative we are handed a standard for living a good life that is so far
the opposite that it is inconceivable to us who are yet in the experiential
stages. To be faced with such
negative choices can project us,
who are yet immature,
into rebellious and truly
destructive paths.
The facts speak for themselves.
For thousands of years our more prominent religious bodies, through its
priests and members, have advocated total sacrifice and subjugation of self.
Thus what transpired was and is disillusionment, and a total inability to
understand how to love others because humans, for the most part, cannot even
love themselves properly. And by
properly, I mean self-respect, self-nurturing, confidence in who they are,
and
who they choose to be. We Indigos
are continuously facing and being challenged by these same perspectives.
To love self is to be true to self.
Many great teachers and way-showers have included love of self in their
classification of spiritual essence, although their terminology would have been
befitting the historical era. But in viewing the history of many religious
traditions, it is possible that structured
restrictive ideologies only delayed humans from
becoming more understanding, tolerant, compassionate,
and loving.
Many of us are awakening to various and
diverse realities. Perhaps the word
“enlightenment,” as utilized by philosophers and teachers, actually means to
lighten up. We have all heard
the expression, “Lighten up, man.” It
is insightful to exchange common street language for the complex interpretation
of words describing fulfillment and contentment.
If we know in our hearts what we mean in what we say, then we can live
them.
When we respect and love ourselves, we
respect and love our neighbors more fully.
No matter the color of skin or ethnic background, we all bleed red, we
all are born and die, and we all are members of one big, human family.
Within our family we Indigos have the qualities to bring peace,
fulfillment, and contentment to all of humanity.
But we have to totally think this, believe this, and live it before it
manifests in our reality.
Everyone desires respect within our families, social interactions, vocations, and communities. The manner in which we demonstrate this varies from situation to situation. “Respect” is the display of regard for the worth of people, including self. In our environment there may be individuals with whom we may not relate as well as we do with others. Yet we acknowledge that all of humanity deserves equal respect and dignity, whether it has been earned or not.
Misunderstandings
can arise between individuals because one or the other feels or sees a lack of
respect in the other; especially among the minorities of the industrialized
countries this is true. Past
experiences have implanted these emotions deeply within cellular memories. Because of this old programming, individuals, both young and
old, may resort to intimidation, violence, and coercion in attempting to force
others to recognize them.
When we accept others for their diversity and uniqueness, we
demonstrate acceptance and recognition of our differences, whether we understand
them or not. An inability to see
beyond another’s racial or cultural distinctions is a form of disrespect. Such inability has been a basic cause of much social unrest
and physical injustice erupting globally. Everyone
is demanding his or her place in the sun.
We hear within youthful peer groups, “I’ll show you respect, if you show me respect.” Our youth demand that adults be responsible in the manner in which they demonstrate their interactions with each other and us. Adults loudly proclaim that they are opening the doors for us. What kind of doors are some adults opening?
We Indigos have the ability to be the role models, even in our teens. We express appreciation of another’s individuality by extending a helping hand to another child, whether at school, on the playground, or in social exchanges. We can express our respect to anyone else by acknowledging his or her presence with a smile, a pleasant remark, perhaps even a thank you for some small service rendered. Adults and youth alike may express the idea of personal dignity by the manner in which we interact with each other.
I remind Indigos that we have the ability to be that which we choose to
be,
and perhaps one day others will catch on.
Under certain conditions, it is difficult to realize that the manner in
which we present ourselves affects the outcome of our own space. This is the crux of all conditions within our environment.
It starts with us.
Proceed to
Chapter Seven 
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