Chapter Four

PARENTING INDIGOS: NO HANDBOOK 

COMES WITH AN INDIGO BABY

As a parent of two Indigo children, Christiana age nine, and Noah age four, I am meeting myself, and then some. Raising these children and, especially Noah, causes me to scratch my memory to find me during those ages.  As I remember, it helps me develop the patience and wisdom necessary to assist these Indigo energies adjust to Earth’s frequencies and accomplish that which they came to do.

During her first three years Christiana displayed many of the same characteristics that Noah now does, except that hers was and is much gentler and responds more easily, especially since she is older with better verbal skills. Also, during her young years I did not work and she didn’t have a sibling interfering with her time and attention.

At school Christiana has only select friends, and complains of the noise and chaos. Since she was very little she sees entities in other vibrations and communicates with them, most often in dreamtime. She feels Earth changes and sees rainbow colors of pink, blue, yellow, and purple around her hands. Since the age when she could verbalize more clearly, she communicated with me about her special gifts.

Christiana is an empathic healer, using healing energy in her lower arms and hands. She seeks to understand how to be compassionate and helpful without feeling drained afterwards.  She often makes the statement that she has magic in her hands that heals. Sometimes she pulls out an invisible bottle that holds her magic, gently opens it, and pours the invisible contents into her hands to heal herself or a family member.

One time she used this magic to ease our family dog moments before he died.  Neither she nor I had any first hand knowledge that he was dying, but she intuited it. Christiana spent the whole morning with our dog Drake, placing her hands on him, and praying over him. 

She continually asks me about emotions and how people feel and act, for this is an area that she needs to understand in order to utilize her empathetic healing vibrations more beneficially.  Her greatest desire is to learn about human emotions--like what we do when we are angry or sad? Where do we feel that, and how do we move that energy?  Her own feelings and the energy associated with them need to be expressed in constructive ways.

She tells me about different incidents, and she has found a little girl at school her age with the same abilities. They discuss their experiences. Christiana states that they sometimes share how they know when someone in their family is about to die. Quite often she comes home from school with a stomach ache, which I think is because her empathetic nature allows her to feel other children’s discomforts.  She loves to draw and her pictures express life as she sees it.

She is most affectionate and needs much love and consideration.  Since Noah demands so much attention, she considerately steps aside without showing resentment. However, both her father and I do special things with her alone to balance quality time for her.  She is willing to help with her brother, actually taking on a motherly role. Yet, I do not want to leave an impression that she is not a normal little girl. She is, and when Noah harasses her too much, she is not against letting him know it in no uncertain terms. Christiana also shows through her actions, like whining, when she is in need of one-on-one attention.

If my husband and I are experiencing anger, she internalizes this energy. As a parent, I need to help her discern her energy from others. She likes everyone to get along and can be impatient at times. No matter what the topic may be, I have to do my best to tell her the truth in such a way that she can understand. For a parent this can become draining and time-consuming to stop and explain everything, but she demands it and will not let it  go. Christiana gets vexed if she is talked down to for she knows she may be young, but not senseless!  I cannot push her feelings under the rug as she will act out her frustration in some manner.  Recently she complained because her body feels so heavy and cumbersome.  She asked if I felt that way also?  I replied that I did.

From the time of his birth Noah definitely has shown that he has a mind of his own. When he wants something and doesn’t get it immediately, he displays his rage by screaming, throwing anything within reach, and refusing to do anything he is asked to do.  He can carry on like this for two or three hours.  I discovered at age two that one way I could calm his tantrum was to take him to his room, which I call “time out,” and he couldn’t come out until he calmed down.  Now when this happens I give him an alternative between time out or something that I know he might choose.  As his ability to verbally communicate increases, acting out his frustration in tantrums and uncontrolled physical reactions lessen. 

He moves quickly and obviously is never confused as to his intent. He sleeps only about seven hours a night and since he has been two, it is very rare for him to take a nap. He is slender and feels like a vibrating rod. During the years of age two and the commencement of age three, he was on a cycle of turning every room upside down, throwing items, breaking many, and climbing everywhere.  Nothing is safe from him unless it has a lock.  If he gets out of the house, he takes off in a direct line as fast as he can. This is dangerous as we live on a farm next to a small creek and adjacent to a highway. Our fences do not keep him in and I panic when he gets out.

Then there is the Noah who loves to be held and snuggled as he is most loving. He is happy with his little cars, mechanical toys, in his sand box, spends considerable time watching children’s videos, and attempts to draw. He is very content and proud when he can help his father work on the car or help his grandpa with small chores around the farm.  Noah can hold his focus as long as he feels he is a part of the work, or it is an action that uses all of his senses. He can become bored with an activity quickly and then out of boredom will pick a fight with his sister, which gets a quick response from her.

At the onset of these behavioral patterns it was difficult to get his attention, but if I could hold him long enough to look him right in the eye and talk to him directly, he responded. At age three his vocabulary was limited, but one of his favorite games was to say words he knew and have us repeat them back.  Then he clapped his hands together and said, "Good." His vocabulary is improving, but he struggles with verbal communication just as I did at his age.

Sometimes when Joan and I are together brainstorming, he climbs on Joan’s lap, opens a little book in front of him, and quietly listens to us for over an hour. It is like he understands on one level. I feel when he is able to speak more clearly so that we can understand him, he will not feel so frustrated. Much of his anger is because his Soul/Mind is racing like mine, but he is unable to communicate.

Noah shows his frustration through aggression. When we go to a children’s museum or the aquarium, he runs around in circles trying to look and be everywhere. He demands to absorb the whole experience at once, instead of a piece at a time. When this occurs, he becomes so agitated that he looks like he is going having a seizure. I settle him down by holding onto him and taking a “time out” because he is unable to stop. He will scream long and loud, not caring that he is drawing everyone’s attention. He is so into his Ego-brain attempting to do that which he intends without any regard to safety, that he is like a bulldozer, and would plow right over the top of people if he could. He becomes over-stimulated when there is much to see and absorb.

He has cute tricks like he ran out of the house on me and I spent frantic moments searching for him before he either drowned or a car hit him.  I searched and called his name for five minutes.  I discovered him standing on a limb in our little apple tree, a broad grin stretched across his face.  He had been watching me the entire time. 

I realize that the reason that Indigo boys are having so much more difficulty in remaining calm, which causes them to be diagnosed as having ADD or such, is because the Indigo energy is androgynous, but it lacks the male, macho genetic programming.  When Indigo vibrations enter the human male body, the circuitry doesn't fit and the Indigo has to utilize so much more of its vibrations to modify the male body to adjust to its energies.  This facet, along with an accelerated Soul/Mind, result in this continuously overactive, male child.

Although he may show his innate male aggressiveness, Noah has a compassionate heart, and enjoys other people. He especially likes little babies and gently plays and talks with them.  He shows great intelligence; it is simply that he is limited from verbally expressing it yet.  I know that he has great purpose in aiding me in my own tasks after he reaches adulthood.  I am the first to admit that because I am a working mother with all of the other chores that the usual mother has, sometimes I forget that which I need to do for him.

My own experiences and the everyday challenges and rewards of raising my children make me know just how difficult Indigos can be and yet, how wonderful they are. During their babyhood and youth, they desperately need assistance and understanding until each becomes aware and commences to fulfill the task selected to help Earth transmute into a planet of Love and Light.  

What do Indigos need?

§        Love:  Generous displays of personal affection, hugging, care, and attention.  We come in on a Love vibration, and it needs to be continually nurtured for adjustment on this plane is most difficult. 

§        Respect:  We will not accept it when adults tell us that we will get respect if we show it first.  We want adults to demonstrate since they are in a position of being our teachers.

§        Creativity:  We have a need to express ourselves through poetry, art, drawing, painting, quilting, handicrafts, writing; anything to channel our high energy into creation.

§        Listen:  We need to be honestly listened to; for adults to hear us out without interruptions or abruptly telling us we are wrong.  We have something to say and we need a safe place in which to say it.  Even if, because of our inexperience, we may not be entirely correct in our viewpoint, we respond better if we are heard out, and then the adult may gently suggest other ways to view the situation.  We see all of life much differently than adults.  Some of this is because we come in knowing, and some of this is because our family environment may have warped our views.

§        Boundaries:  We need the freedom to express ourselves, but our parents should create definite boundaries of what is right and wrong, as far as restrictions within the household and family environment, and teach life skills and character education.  This is why it is so important that parents and those in control of youth actually live their lives in the manner that they advocate.  I have seen children teach each other for truly broken children quite often are so dispirited that they accept their peers as role models rather than adults.

§        Education:  We should be challenged and allowed to express our thoughts in a supportive atmosphere where we are not ridiculed.  It is important that we develop critical thinking skills by learning from our peers in a peaceful area where we can exchange.  What better way for Indigos to learn than from each other?

§        Hope:  Sometimes because of adverse living conditions, we become extremely agitated and depressed.  We should be encouraged to see light at the end of the tunnel.  With hope goes the act of forgiveness.

§        Forgiveness:  We need to let go of others’ negative energy or Thought forms that hold us by learning how to forgive when we are hurt.  It is tricky because we must learn how to forgive the personal intent of the individual who activated the hurt.  But we are to remember the action so that we are able to utilize this experience to make the changes we came here to effectuate.  We can acknowledge another’s fault, yet keep compassion within our hearts in the hope that our positive energy will raise the other’s movements into more loving actions.  We Indigos are able to see the Light in others and actually bring it to the surface if we are made aware of the fact that we have this gift.    

§        Responsibility:  We should be taught responsibility in carrying out chores and take part in community activities that are beneficial for others.  In this manner we learn our part in society’s interchanges.  It helps us awaken to the fact that our lives are to be utilized for the highest and greatest good of all.  

§        Integrity:  We should be complimented on our productive efforts so that we continue to seek good principles by which to live that do not trespass against others or ourselves.  We should be encouraged not to compromise our values and to be who we truly are, regardless of how challenging that may be while we are children. 

§ Self-discipline:  We should be encouraged to be self-disciplined, attempt to see the big picture of any situation and not be overwhelmed. Because of our rapid rate and manner of thinking, we find it difficult to remain focused so we need help with this.  (Because my Soul/Mind flits with the rapidity of the scenes, I get much better information when I am required to specifically focus on one subject.) 

  § Encouragement:  We should be supported in our efforts to strive for higher states of experience, to learn from our mistakes and failures, but not to thrive on them.

§        Fairness:  We seek to be treated with fairness and point it out immediately when we see someone is not being fair.  We demand equality, to be treated in the same manner others want us to treat them.  We want others to be open-minded and not so rigid.