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No part of this document may be reproduced by any means without the written permission
of Jose M. Salomon S.
No responsibility is taken for any loss, damage, expense,
bodily harm, confusion, obfuscation, precambrian micro-organisms,
liberal tendencies, linguistic complications, sheep, unexpected
spleen removal, unsightly stains, the heartbreak of psoriasis,
brain damage due to cosmic rays generated by extraterrestrial
spacecraft, enlarged feet, outrage, premature combustion,
pregnancy, lack of pregnancy, uncontrollable stuttering, early
battery failure, road-kill cats, grave offense to the deity of
your choice, tasteless pink plastic flamingos appearing without
warning on your lawn, spontaneous human combustion, laser rot,
Levis, plagues of locusts, the disappearance of your wife,
Jehovah's Witnesses, body hair which might be difficult or
embarrassing to remove, the planet Jupiter,
Central Pacific Time, pieces of string in excess of eleven
inches, his most exalted majesty Price Gregor Mesopotamia of no
fixed address and any unexpected electrical shocks, however they
are caused.
This document may not be duplicated, transmitted, stored,
genetically manipulated, spindled, folded, mutilated, crushed,
cracked, stapled, punched, bound, photocopied, autopsied,
tenderized, ignited, lunched, launched, lurched, flocculated,
fluctuated, fornicated, arched, axed, actuated, confabulated,
congratulated, hyprinfundibulated, pressed, hydrogenized,
pasteurized, homogenized, carburetted, liberalized, disinfected,
disenfranchised, disembowelled, disinformed, disinterred,
displayed, disfigured, distrusted, shredded, diced, pureed,
masticated, archived, buffed, rebuffed, refrigerated, retrieved,
reformed, rebuked, returned, retreaded, sawn, shingled,
lobotomized, appendicized, amputated, articulated, artheroscoped
or sent by special messenger to a small poorly-lit restaurant in
an unnamed village in the south of Mexico where it might be
recycled into political statements about the lack of comfortable
leisure seating without the written permission of my self.
This document may not be duplicated in any manner without the
express permission of the publisher, including but not exclusive
to photocopying, lithography, facsimile, calligraphy, hand-
written reproductions, impressing into wax tablets, writing in
Nile mud, carolingian miniature script, translation into haiku,
uncial illuminated manuscripts, rendering as verse in iambic
pentameter, bellowing by an overweight Sinaloa ferret rancher
through a distorted megaphone in the town square of a small but
populous market village in the Sierra Madre, graffiti, bawdy sea
chanties, engraving on the head of a pin, microfilming for
discrete infiltration into an unnamed but potentially volatile
guerrilla camp high in the mountains of Chiapas, carving into the
trunk of a redwood, tattooing across the broad, muscular buttocks
of a professional female nude grape jelly wrestler, branding onto
the side of a yak with a laser, scrawling in ball point pen on
the back of a sleeping brother-in-law, skywriting, snow
sculpting, painting in oils, sketching in partially coagulated
goat's blood on the forehead of a liberal politician running for
re-election on a platform of prosperity through higher taxation
of anything impertinent enough to move or uploading to God.
This document may contain opossum dandruff, desiccated
hectoliters, psilomelane, heterocercal mesothoractic dorsal fins,
maleic acid, hypostatic secretions, wolfsbane, orobanchacite,
vacuolated hematite, aromatic essence of giraffe, hydrogenized
gouda cheese, iguana nostrils, mellifluous swamp byproducts,
ommatidium, palindromes, argentite, a tendency toward Einsteinian
shift, oil of venus flytrap, zoroastrian running shoes, samphire,
mitochondria, road-kill skunk, gamma globulin, lead acetate,
fissionable isotopes, recycled post-consumer waste, roseola,
abatoir left-overs, brake drums from a 1963 Chevy Biscayne, lost
wax, armageddon, Grimm's Law, sprues, hogfish parts,
dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane, San Tejeringo El Chico,
all or part of the remaining wardrobe of the former inhabitants
of Atlantis, polysorbate 80, mantoids, the lesser Magellanic
cloud, Morgan the unspeakably large Newfoundland dog, a plague of
espresso makers, powdered toe of liberal, and the complete works of
Guillermo Ballesteros.
Please be certain that you have read the foregoing carefully
before proceeding.
Updated on:
Oct. 30, 2001
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Designed by
Jose M. Salomon S. Culiacan, Sin. Mexico,
1999
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