| Clarinet Jokes |
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| "The clarinet is an instrument the only thing worse than which is two." How many clarinetists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but he'll go through the whole box of lightbulbs before he finds just the right one. What's the definition of "nerd?" Someone who owns their own alto clarinet. What do you call a bass clarinetist with half a brain? Gifted. You might notice that there are very few jokes about the clarinet. This is out of sympathy. The clarinet has already been the but of so many jokes - the saxophone, for instance. Is there any difference between the sound of a clarinet and that of a cat in heat? Of course, but only if the cat is in good health. How do you get a clarinetist out of a tree? Cut the noose. What do a clarinet and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed. What is the best use for duct tape? Taping a clarinetist's mouth shut. What's the difference between the hospital use of a clarinet and a saxophone? The saxophone is used to lull crying babies to sleep, while the clarinet is used to wake coma patients. What's the difference between a mouse and a clarinet? You can't hear a mouse squeak over a band. Why do clarinetists blow their horns between their legs? That's all the excitement they can get. |
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