Jimbo Arrested!

Police have been unable to question Jimbo yet, as he is still too drunk to give coherent answers. The police found him in a movie theater, standing on top of seats and speaking German rapidly. According to officers, their equipment broke when they tried to test Jimbo�s blood alcohol content. "When we listened closely, we thought we could actually hear his liver groaning because all the alcohol it was receiving," said one officer. "It turned out to really be the other theater patrons groaning about the terrible movie that was playing."

Jimbo�s friends said that Jimbo traditionally consumes 42 cans of beer on Sundays. "Sometimes we place bets on whether he�ll be picked up by the police or by paramedics," said one.

This is Jimbo�s fifty-third arrest for public intoxication. He has also been arrested forty times for DUI (though he has never actually caused an accident), six times for indecent exposure, and eight hundred sixty-seven times for disturbing the peace. "It�s okay, as long as they don�t deny me my constitutional right to get excessively drunk," Jimbo has said.

Jimbo is expected to be unconscious most of today. He is not expected to have any idea why he�s in a police station when he awakens.

Jimbo�s mug shot